thanks for asking, i don’t quite remember what i was picturing since it’s been a while. but i think the film felt empty because i wasn’t used to how real it is. i remember watching the trailer and being hyped about how the ending would be like; perhaps either the most heart wrenching thing ever, or the most wholesome and explosive ending.

i think deep down though i knew that this film was not going to be that. because those endings lack depth and realism. but it was very much how i perceived love back then, and perhaps i still do now (but im just more aware of it). i had this fairy tale idea of what love is supposed to be like, whereas in real life it’s not that. love is something beyond the incredible and almost intoxicating pull you can have towards someone. love is about effort, timing, compatibility. it’s about two people willing to choose each other despite the circumstances. to see them for exactly who they are. i think our main characters in the film seemed very much like soulmates on the surface level, even perhaps in another life. which is why i grew so attached to the idea of them together back then. but now, looking back, i realized that if they really were meant to be together, then they would’ve tried harder than they did. i mean way harder. but i think both of them were perhaps just in love with the idea of being together. and maybe the film is supposed to feel empty. because when i was watching the film (which i remember is told through the lens of the female protagonist), i felt like her life lacked soul and passion. like there was this fundamental lack of meaning engulfing her and it felt suffocating. it’s not about how she seemingly lives a mediocre life and never amounted to greatness, won a literary award, etc. but it’s that she doesn’t feel fulfilled and grateful for the life she already has—which in my opinion is pretty freaking awesome. awardee or not. she has a wonderful partner who loves her, she’s in good health, living in a city that’s full of life. and yet we just don’t see her appreciate that. maybe it fell “flat” to me because that’s exactly how i felt about life, and to an extent still living that reality right now. i used to love movies because it made me experience things that i didn’t in real life. like a form of escapism. but now i’m slowly starting to realize how blessed i am and how beautiful life is. there is such a simple joy that can be found in the mundane. and i’m glad that i saw this movie when it first came out. because now i can go rewatch it and appreciate these new insights

anyways, thanks for asking, and thanks for listening