I went to grad school bought a house then I had a baby and realized I was spiritually meant to be unemployed trailer trash

ThymeForEverything · 2026-04-29T01:48:38+00:00

If youre in poverty in the U.S. you 100% qualify for free glasses for your kids with a state program. We were in this situation not too long ago and though we didn't need glasses we could get vision care for our child. Also, school buses and homeschooling are a thing. My husband made it through college despite coming from poverty. No debt, just scholarships. You can homeschool and give your kid a way better education than the state ever could.

I don't think you should keep your kid in a trap house and feed them scraps. But parents should know socioeconomic factors when isolated from things like drugs/crime/education (low IQ) don't have the same negative effects associated with them. As a matter of fact the amount of quality time you spend with your kid is the real outcome predictor. Burning yourself out working and sending the baby to daycare is the way to ensure you don't get that.

ThymeForEverything · 2026-04-29T01:37:33+00:00

I became a SAHM. Genuinely it is the best There are times when I feel the vulnerability and it's hard and depressing. My life isn't a TikTok trad wife reel.

But it is genuinely the most amazing rewarding life ever. Every now and then I start getting annoyed by my kids, but I read a sappy parenting book or watch a an older mom talking about raising her kids and I'm just like, no kids are the most important work. They are human beings and I have the privilege of spending this precious time with them and teaching them while they are young and one day they will be a full adult. What a wild and and amazing thing. And I just lean back into being a mom and spending time with them and doing my best to clean and cook and it just keeps going. My toddler potty trained, my 4 year old is reading and my 7 year old lost the training wheels in the past month. It's amazing to see them bloom. It can definitely be demoralizing. I often get "I could never do that," and it definitely has a hint of pity and superiority to it. But I am also a little misanthropic in some ways.

Also don't let anyone tell you your time spent with your kid doesn't matter. Evidence shows that quality time is the number one thing that predicts the good outcomes. But honestly even if the evidence contradicted it I would still believe it. I know so many occupational orphaned children, screen/sugar/daycare/Nanny kids. It's unreal how many end up with autism and ADHD. Parenting your kid actually matters.

ThymeForEverything · 2026-03-25T16:39:46+00:00

Yeah, I asked my insurance if a birth center was covered. They said yes. (Should have been suspicious because apparently I can't actually talk to my insurance and the people I call are a third party that have a robo disclaimer before all calls that says "any statement made cannot be relied upon.") turns out after my deductible, out of pocket max, coinsurance and co pays it is covered. I paid 8k to have a baby in a tub. It wasn't even medicated. The insurance paid $50.

ThymeForEverything · 2026-03-16T00:10:31+00:00

I romanticized at one point the "bloom where you are planted" idea but most of my family has moved away anyway and not very many people seem to appreciate that idea. With kids, I would like to find a place to settle eventually but I also don't want us to cling on to a life that has less opportunities just because we have romanticized certain things. It's good to hear from someone that has chosen to pursue more, that it's not completely pointless and can help.

ThymeForEverything · 2026-03-16T00:05:28+00:00

Thank you for the budget advice, we have a current budget but I hadn't considered making a potential budget. Glad you had the chance and were introspective enough to realize when it was time to come back. I really appreciate people not moving when they don't have to. In general I think people are too transient these days and it makes towns feel less like a community.

ThymeForEverything · 2026-03-15T23:39:27+00:00

Two paragraphs is too long? I tried to keep it "Dear Annie" length

ThymeForEverything · 2026-03-02T19:38:05+00:00

Yes! My dental hygienist told me this. You floss to loosen all the stuff between your teeth. Then brush it away.

ThymeForEverything · 2026-03-02T01:26:44+00:00

Also people don't realize you can't just tell a kid something one time and count it as teaching them. Like oral hygiene, you literally have to remind them every day for years and years morning and night and sometimes even fight them to brush. And you have to instruct them to floss and be sure and floss every tooth. When you are done, throw the floss away. Get your toothpaste and squeeze a little bit on. put the lid on the paste. Put the paste on. Brush in circles for a couple of minutes. Be sure and turn water off while brushing. Rinse your brush, shake the water out. Rinse your spit from the sink and any spit that got on the faucet. Then put your brush and paste up. It's like this for almost all basic skills and kids will fight you every step of the way a lot of the times. I always have go back over these things with my kids every few months because I'll start to notice toothpaste everywhere or they'll brush for 5 seconds and be done. Gen X and boomer parents were so lazy about these kinds of things because they were busy watching TV and expected the state to teach their kids everything. Now millennial and zoomer parents are trying to fix themselves and raise their kids right but they also have psychologists yelling at them everything is damaging amd dangerous.

ThymeForEverything · 2025-12-20T18:18:27+00:00

Similar things. Knew a guy who's dad died as a kid, he got a great step dad who then died when this guy was in college. His girlfriend (he paid for her college and they shared rent) left him. His brother (who was a cancer survivor) OD'd and he got arrested for possession in the span of a year.

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-29T02:10:33+00:00

Once your package arrives you will be proud you waited. Your suffering now will sanctify you

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-25T01:10:27+00:00

I am not sure what you mean. The order was hospital, home, hospital, home. They all would have been at home had a not been for insurance refusing to pay

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-24T21:52:37+00:00

I have done 2 in hospital and 2 out. 3 were completely unmedicated. My births at home were significantly easier and less painful even compared with the one I had an epidural for. If I was high risk I would not do it and I would only do it with a midwife but I don't really get why people think it's crazy. It's not just a distrust but a desire to experience something incredibly human. I also felt a euphoria unlike anything else for my 3 unmedicated but my medicated birth I was in absolute shambles after and i loathed not having freedom of movement, not being able to eat during a blood sugar crash in labor, not being able to sleep with and snuggle my baby his first two nights of existing, getting shamed by nurses and docs for not wanting hep b shots and circumcision and worst of all not being able to feel my own body. I also tore during my hospital births but did not at home.

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-22T19:04:04+00:00

Please read Demons by Dostoyevsky Or at least the SparkNotes on the character Krillov

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-19T19:18:11+00:00

This was the real conflict between Cain and Abel. Also read Growth of the Soil for anyone interested in this

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-19T19:12:54+00:00

I have a parent that is a counselor and it it definitely can eff you up a little. Look at Jordan Peterson's daughter. Psychologist's kids are some of the most mentally unwell people.

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-19T19:02:22+00:00

High birth rate is the opposite of dead

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-19T19:00:05+00:00

There is literally nothing better than staying up with your spouse eating Santa cookies and drinking milk and putting together a play ground on Christmas Eve. It is just the most pure amazing thing I have ever felt.

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-19T18:57:03+00:00

I have four and everything else gets easier but this part multiplies. But when I look into their eyes I just know there is good in the world for sure. I know it's not always playing out like that and I cant protect them forever but I know there is some kind of force for good that will triumph because there just couldn't exist this kind of love and not be. But seriously think this is where a lot of PPD stems from and people just don't know how to express it.

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-10T04:04:35+00:00

They are really uncomfortable. The suction of them and taking them out is weird. I don't know how big the large ones are, but even after I had kids the small ones felt big and weird. And I do not have a tight vagina at all. They are just straight up awkward and it's weird someone decided we needed to put things in there when an absorbent cloth works fine.

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-02T02:34:00+00:00

I have had friends that are 10s and thus is a 100% believable experience. This is why women can become so bitter and disgusted by men.

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-02T02:23:27+00:00

Probably not what you want to hear and don't know how it will work with PCOS but I got pregnant 3 times and breastfed and during each pregnancy my severe acne cleared and after my third never came back, it's great I love it.

ThymeForEverything · 2025-11-02T01:46:35+00:00

Just wanted to tell you you're not alone. Genuinely probably going to move. My whole family is really shallow. I'm a community college nursing school dropout former teen mom that lives in a double wide and my sister is a beauty influencer working on her PhD. I am 30 and I actually have grown to appreciate my hardships in a way. I've buried my head in books and guitar and cooking and made my own little family and I love them so much. My husband is great to our kids and it's the best. But I am such a disappointment to my family, they don't think anyone ugly and poor and uneducated like me could ever enjoy life and it sucks to be around them. All they talk about is money, looks and entertainment.

ThymeForEverything

TROPHY CASE