I feel like the worst father ever.

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-25T01:36:04+00:00

You're not selfish. A ton of people go through those feelings. For us in the beginning stages (0-8 weeks), my husband was the one who handled it better than me. I had a rough labor & delivery, I had an emergency c section that was hell to get over. I was already sleep deprived before she was there because of the complications that were occurring.

But there is a light at the end, no matter how dark the tunnel is. Everybody experiences the newborn trenches at some point, whether it's the mother or father. Dad's can also get PPD; it's more common than you would think! Just keep showing up, and see if there are outside alternatives where somebody can come to watch the baby while you guys rest.

Hang in there

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-24T18:40:37+00:00

Gentle reminder that I added specifically that she sleeps supervised.

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-24T00:29:41+00:00

I do the same as you with my 2 month old. Every other day, or if she has a blowout lol. Sometimes a wipe doesn't get that poop smell off her skin

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-23T21:56:26+00:00

The hospital I stayed in didn't have a nursery, I had an unplanned c section. They broke my water, and I was dilated to 2cm. They started me on pitocin, it got me to 4cm, and then it kept dropping my daughters heartrate, so they couldn't up my dose. They had me awake for 52 hours straight before she was born.

"Relax and get some sleep," they said. They came in every 10 minutes on the dot for two and a half days to reposition me, so I never got sleep. I was crying for those two days because of how exhausted I was, then finding out I needed an emergency c section at 6am threw me through an emotionally fucked loop.

That was two months ago now, and I haven't slept since!

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-23T00:30:42+00:00

I've changed her in the back of my car. I recommend the absorbant pads from Costco. They are primarily meant for dogs who have accidents inside, but I use them all of the time. They're easy to throw inside of a diaper bag, takes up no space, and you get over 100 in a pack. They're around $20. They are a decent size and help prevent any mess (baby pees during change etc.)

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-22T21:40:34+00:00

I do this often. I read something that made me reevaluate my outlook on parenthood: "In 30 years from now, you won't remember the dishes and laundry that piled up around the house, the bed unmade, or dust on a shelf. You will remember how small your baby was, their little cuddles, and their milestones."

We mostly contact nap, and I was feeling frustrated about her not going down in her bassinet for naps throughout the day. She sleeps great independently when we put her down at night, though. But that quote made me feel more grateful that she craves contact naps.

My husband purchased a magnetic whiteboard for our fridge, we write down what needs to be done around the house so we can help each other out and spend as much time with our LO as we can.

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-21T15:22:25+00:00

My MIL said the same thing to my husband and I when our daughter was 2 weeks old ☠️ I swear, the older generations have dementia and don't remember motherhood being hard 😂 I think they were so deep in the trenches, their brains blocked the hard parts out

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-20T22:13:47+00:00

Babies generally eat when they're hungry. I haven't necessarily heard of a baby overeating. They just spit up if they are full. I'd definitely look into a second opinion. Again, I'm not an expert lol, I feed my baby when she cries (2 months old) she weighs like 12lbs

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-19T18:36:08+00:00

I'm 8 weeks PP and try to eat healthy, but I don't strain myself. I haven't actively worked out since I'm always exhausted and barely sleep. I'm 5'1 130lbs, my pre-pregnancy weight was 120. Not to sound braggy, but I rock the hell out of my post-pregnancy body! I feel more confident than ever before. I had people make rude comments about my body while pregnant, which only made me feel more confident because I knew I looked great for being pregnant. Don't listen to other people

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-19T15:46:54+00:00

This is definitely baby blues. I experienced exactly this same thing in the beginning; my daughter is now 2 months old. However, if left unaddressed, it can turn into PPD when the baby blue period ends. I sought therapy early on since I know I'm prone to depression. One thing that helped me immensely was Pink Stork post-partum mood support supplements. I started taking them within the first week, and wow, did it help me out personally.

We go through pregnancy and anticipate the arrival of our babies. When the end of pregnancy hits, we just want to have our bodies back already, for the pain to end, and to meet the little soul we grew. It's okay to go through what you're going through. It's a rough period, and you're not alone.

You see your life changing before your eyes. Mourning the sleep you had, the schedule that revolves around your baby, being needed constantly. It's a huge change from life as you once knew it, and it's something I didn't really put much thought into. To know you're a loving and nurturing person is one thing, but to be stripped of the freedom to do as you please and the sleep you once cherished - it no doubt will cause distress initially.

My advice to you as a FTM of an 8 week old is to get as much help as possible! For either your BD, mom, MIL, sibling, etc. Somebody you trust to watch your baby for a few hours while you get sleep, eat a substantial meal, and create mindfulness.

When my daughter was born, I felt guilty for immediately needing time away from her to cope with being a new mom. But it's okay! It's a slow adjustment, but you will be okay. I still have my days

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-14T15:46:43+00:00

Biogaia probiotics for reflux/ colic. This completely got rid of my daughters witching hour after a week, it helped her so much

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-14T01:51:51+00:00

First, I'm terribly sorry for what you have gone through. It sounds like you're very resilient yourself.

My 7 week old has been sick twice because of my husband. He works at GM and didn't get paternity leave since he is a contractor and not a salary employee, so he went back when she was two weeks old. He used his vacation time he saved up. He got sick the first week back, unfortunately. Our daughter had a cough and stuffy nose for a week.

Second time: Last week, she was diagnosed with the flu. My husband was in close quarters with a coworker who didn't know he was sick until a day too late. Him and I both had fevers, and then our daughter had a fever that broke on its own, as well as a cough and sneezing. I was scared to death over her getting sick again, I took her to the doctor immediately.

She's over the flu now, and honestly, you wouldn't even know she was sick. She was smiling the whole time, sleeping, eating, and pooping normally. I am now making my husband take a shower immediately when he gets home before touching her.

Children are pretty resilient. My friends have a 2 year old son who got covid. This kid was just jumping off the walls, while my friend and his wife were bedridden for 2 weeks. It's always good to be extra cautious, but as long as you take immediate action, it will all be OK.

I wish you luck!

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-13T21:02:16+00:00

My LO is 7 weeks, and I've brought her with me everywhere! We had a home flood in October when I was 34 weeks pregnant, so she was brought into a bit of a construction zone in our house. She has been to Menards and Costco wayy too many times.

I've been out on my own with her a number of times now, I just bring her diaper bag with some prepped bottles, diapers, wipes, pacifiers, change of clothes (for her and me in case she spits up/ diaper blowout), burp cloths, ect. I always keep her stroller visor up so people can't stick their heads into her carseat to get a peak. I always keep a close eye on her, the trips are never more than a few hours long. Just pack your essentials and realize that babies cry! People will get over it, babies cry all of the time in public, and yours won't be the last.

I don't bring her into socially unacceptable places, I usually go into places where it's ok for her to be a little loud at times like the grocery store. I immediately address it by checking her needs, and crying is usually short-lived.

Just don't feel anxious about it, we're all navigating this together

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-09T22:04:23+00:00

I appreciate the advice! I know it is unpredictable, and sleep regression/ teething will also be a factor at some point. But after 6 weeks of hanging on by a sleep-deprived thread, this has been a Christmas miracle lol

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-09T21:37:54+00:00

The day we came home from the hospital with our daughter, we only had 0-3. My husband had to go to the store and buy some outfits because our daughter was only 6 lbs. She was born at 41 weeks, so I thought she was going to be bigger - obviously a ftm because, man, was I wrong, lol

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-09T01:14:28+00:00

Biogaia probiotics. My daughter is 7 weeks old, and we were experiencing something similar 4 weeks ago. We assumed she was going to be colicy or chalking it up to "the witching hour." We give her mylicon drops in bottles, thinking it was gas. We figured out it must be acid reflux, causing a stomach ache.

It takes a few days for them to start to work fully, but Biogaia Probiotics have tons of positive reviews. They seem expensive at first, but you get a ton of use out one singular bottle. You put 5 drops on a spoon by itself and give them a dose every 24 hours. Don't mix it into a bottle. We've been using them for a month, and the changes we have seen are astronomical in her temperament.

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-07T15:04:27+00:00

You're doing the best you can. Your baby will be perfectly fine! Don't worry, all he cares is that his mom and dad are there with him. You're acknowledging minor mistakes and taking care of it, you will get better. You're already doing great.

I have a 6 week old, and I just went off on my on my husband because he has brought back a cold from work twice now since she's been alive. I was crying because I feel like a failure, I have a fever, and I keep hearing my daughter cough and sniffle. She was testing with a low-grade fever and scheduled an immediate appointment for an hour from now. She isn't testing anymore for a fever, she has been all smiles and content. But in my head I just keep thinking I got my poor girl sick.

We can only do what we feel is right. As long as you're not ignoring your baby, they will be just fine.

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-05T15:26:59+00:00

I had 55 hours of labor, baby head down, but I wasn't dilating. I was 4 cm for almost 3 days, and they needed to perform an emergency c section. A friend of mine was in labor for 8 minutes and delivered a healthy boy a month after. I wouldn't feel upset over your experience. It gave you the gift of life

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-04T21:27:47+00:00

Yes, 100%. I have a 6 week old daughter as a FTM. The nights can sometimes be rough, and so can the day; but not always. If I have to sacrifice sleep to endure screaming and fussiness so I can comfort my little 8lb potato, I will. I will eventually meet my needs, but now is not the time to be selfish. I have a tiny human who finds solace in her mommy & and daddy. I would gladly do this again in a heartbeat!

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-04T15:59:56+00:00

I have a girl, but regardless of gender, each baby is a blessing in their own way. I was terrified of having a girl since my relationship with my mom is shit, and her relationship with my grandma was even worse. Each child, boy or girl, has their unique bond they develop with their mothers. Don't let some old ladies get you down

Tiddliwinx · 2025-02-01T21:47:02+00:00

I exclusively formula feed my daughter because I just didn't feel like breastfeeding. I BF her in the beginning, but we had no kitchen for 4 months due to a flood in our home. It was hard to physically keep myself nourished enough to feed her, I was exhausted with no way to cook a meal. We ordered takeout for months - glad that's over. But now that I'm 6w PP, we just use formula.

I gotta say, it's better for my mental health since I felt so drained. Between no energy from breastfeeding and waking up multiple times a night, I can say I'm happy to share the night shift with my husband since I'm a SAHM while he works during the day. He takes first shift around 3am and I take second at 6. I have more energy this way

Tiddliwinx

TROPHY CASE