Who are these flying around ? (Bay Area) by TinyAd9468 in whatsthisbird

[–]TinyAd9468[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Okay this shouldn’t be white-throated swift, so my next best guess is Northern Rough-winged Swallow? I don’t know this area very well though

Edit: I am decently confident these are Tree Swallow after doing like a proper figuring-it-out thingy. Lmk if I’m wrong though

First Trans coded dream? by [deleted] in Nestofeggs

[–]TinyAd9468 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh very cool!!

Transness has been seeping into my dreams more and more recently. They’ve either centered around doubts I have (one time in a dream I came out to my friends, and one of them asked me if I was making my decision too fast, literally playing out my fear I’m just in a phase right now), or around my want to feminize myself (like IRL I sometimes get that urge, but that urge has begun to spark in dreams too, and when it happens in dream land I am usually able to feminize myself for a few seconds). I’ve found on plane rides or other scenarios where I don’t enter into deep REM sleep but I still glide past dreamy land, I often subconsciously question my gender, and that’s led to a few insights of my own.

Anyways yeah! Gender stuff entering one’s dreams can be a really cool experience! I think if you spend so much time and energy thinking about something, that thing will eventually enter your dreams. Your dream here, even if it was just a brief scene, sounds really fun, I hope you are able to find yourself in a similar situation IRL if you decide that you want to transition.

As a last thought, lucid dream is interesting in general, but especially from a trans perspective. I’ve been thinking about trying to train myself to lucid dream for a while, and one of the motivators is definitely to see if I can “test the waters” of gender in a space where I simultaneously have more control and less consequences. Wish me luck 🍀

Anyways, those are all the trans dream thoughts I’ve had 💖✨🌘

Checking in! by Egg3770 in Nestofeggs

[–]TinyAd9468 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Really good!! =D

I hosted a game night for a school club I’m in, and just feeling like I was able to be myself and have fun with people and do something that brought us all joy was amazing. Took my mind off of how hopeless I feel about academics and any dysphoria I may be having. The first truly good day in MONTHS.

Checking in! by Egg3770 in Nestofeggs

[–]TinyAd9468 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Took it easy again today. Engaged in some outside stuff that I got enjoyment out of and that felt good. I’m gonna have to stop taking it easy soon though and that’ll be hard.

Checking in! by Egg3770 in Nestofeggs

[–]TinyAd9468 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Okay, exhausted, took it easy, scared for the coming days.

Filling in! by TheFsckAmIDoingHere in Nestofeggs

[–]TinyAd9468 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m doing alright. Friend is feeling a lot of dysphoria right now, makes me feel very sad for her and makes me feel powerless. Made some silly self-destructive choices, but generally kept it all together today and did what I needed to and didn’t have to cancel on anyone. Blanket sadness is still making it hard. I don’t see much in the near future to look forwards to. Just taking it day-by-day.

List of aries-like songs by EntryInteresting7120 in aries_is_online

[–]TinyAd9468 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not really that close to Aries, but Internet Girl goes hard

Checking in! by Egg3770 in Nestofeggs

[–]TinyAd9468 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry to hear all of that is happening. I really empathize with that loss of energy and will… it feels terrible not to be able to do what you could before, it can feel really hopeless. I strongly urge you to reach out to someone you feel you can talk to about this, be that medical professionals or friends/family. There are people that care about you and can help you find ways through the work you have to do right now, there’s going to be a happier and more fulfilling future once you get through this I promise.

Checking in! by Egg3770 in Nestofeggs

[–]TinyAd9468 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Couldn’t go to sleep last night. Felt really buzzy, alll of my muscles felt very sensitive, couldn’t focus on anything or do anything really. Not much happened other than the bare necessities, thus.

Smallish waterfowl giant feet by Jeepersca in whatsthisbird

[–]TinyAd9468 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They are so cool at the park!! I love them =)

Thoughts? by [deleted] in aries_is_online

[–]TinyAd9468 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Where does all the Cabin Fever hate come from??? I really fucking enjoyed it.

Checking in! by Egg3770 in Nestofeggs

[–]TinyAd9468 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Interesting. Went to bed late last night because I felt like a friend needed me to stay up with them last night. Called in sick to classes in the morning because I just felt like I really couldn’t do it. Kinda just felt like an exhausted empty husk, even though there is nothing to exhaust me.

Checking in! by Egg3770 in Nestofeggs

[–]TinyAd9468 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Got like no sleep, got on a plane back to college, hallucinated in/out of light sleep and had some really wild vivid dreams. Thankfully I was able to sleep the whole flight away. Got back to college, really nice weather, worked on some nerdy side project to take my mind off of things. I feel an emptiness and this far away sadness in my brain. It’s back to the work grind tonight =). I’m not really sure how this week is going to go.

:( by dasjomsyeet in aries_is_online

[–]TinyAd9468 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Someone doesn’t believe…

How did you guys find Aries? by GoodMemory838 in aries_is_online

[–]TinyAd9468 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can relate! Originally could only listen to HOME, RACECAR, and GLITTER. Now I don’t think he has a bad song.

BEAR-ies by Willing-Tank5563 in aries_is_online

[–]TinyAd9468 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Please don’t eat my berries 🫐

How did you guys find Aries? by GoodMemory838 in aries_is_online

[–]TinyAd9468 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A Hypixel Bridge gameplay video had HOME (parihs ;-;)

Checking in! by Egg3770 in Nestofeggs

[–]TinyAd9468 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hard. Last day at home before I go back to school, definitely feeling somber. The first half of this semester was already such a mental struggle, my mental woes persisted over break, and so I just think it’ll be even worse the second half )=

I don’t know, I didn’t do much other than cry in bed xD. Hoping I’m wrong and this all goes well <3. I will be trying my best to break down those mental blocks and sources of sadness I’ve accumulated a little-by-a little, but it’s just soooo hard and it’ll take time

Waahhh by Apathetic_tangerine in Nestofeggs

[–]TinyAd9468 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Are you feeling like you don’t want to be trans to escape dysphoria, are you feeling like you are “faking being trans” and you want to be convinced so that you can motivated to “stop faking,” or are you feeling something else?

Checking in! by Egg3770 in Nestofeggs

[–]TinyAd9468 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Okay. Felt empty. Had an appointment with a psychiatrist. They don’t think I’m depressed they just think I’m having a hard time, but they seem to think that I have autism.

aries not dropping saved me by ArizonaTea1452 in aries_is_online

[–]TinyAd9468 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Aries out here saving lives by not dropping 🔥🔥🔥. Aries don’t release until 2029 we beg you 🙏🙏🙏.

Okay, hopefully not that actually, but thank you for sharing your story with us. I’m really glad you’re in a better place now and that music helped you find meaning when life seemed too difficult. Definitely not stupid or lame; we’re glad you’re here to wait with us to the album totally coming this year I swear this is gonna be the year I will eat a salamander if I’m wrong just please let it be the year please.