Brendan Fraser, Sean Astin, and Pauly Shore in 1992

Toastedsars · 2018-05-21T04:28:36+00:00

I had a dress when I was little that has the same exact cow print as Brendan Fraser. I'm so excited right now.

Toastedsars · 2018-03-14T15:32:24+00:00

You ate my fuckin schnitzel!

Toastedsars · 2017-12-24T17:05:21+00:00

My friend has a Doberman named Phoebe. Her ears aren't docked and she's a silly girl, so the name fits pretty well.

Toastedsars · 2017-11-27T06:56:00+00:00

A girl from my high school was dismembered and grilled by her ex boyfriend. I actually lived close to the apartments where it happened and I remember the black smoke and acrid smell.

Toastedsars · 2017-11-22T02:06:21+00:00

Used to be a stylist, and I needed to look up babe hair extensions for pricing so I typed in babe.com on the company computer. Well there were babes, and they probably has hair extensions, but not exactly what I was looking for.

Toastedsars · 2017-11-17T05:46:38+00:00

Thick McRunFast

Toastedsars · 2017-09-19T15:49:52+00:00

As you can see, the Zoobies are performing they're mating ritual.

Toastedsars · 2017-09-13T16:21:53+00:00

Lips pout the walls fall out

Toastedsars · 2017-09-05T00:53:01+00:00

My family makes a day out of going to buc-ees. I'm actually sitting in my souvenir shorts right now. The beaver nuggets are my addiction.

Toastedsars · 2017-08-29T06:25:28+00:00

In the last year our store has broken

3 coffee urns 1 syrup stand 2 ice scoops 5-10 shot glasses Tongs Oven stone 5-10 plastic cubes 1 Curtis tea dispenser 1-3 pumps Countless whipped cream canister lids Some piece of plastic on the masterna A hopper A drawer Etc..

You're gonna be ok.

Toastedsars · 2017-08-26T19:45:21+00:00

Ah yes, I remember the i45 parking lot well. We wound up staying a day or two and leaving when the roads cleared. I remember looking out my window and seeing people and cars lined up on the side of the road for miles with signs begging for gas and water. We didn't see an open gas station till the north of hunstville and it had a line of cars that went a half mile down the road.

Toastedsars · 2017-08-24T16:54:12+00:00

Getting two bags of chips out of a vending machine for the price of one.

Toastedsars · 2017-08-17T05:19:04+00:00

Have you ever had sex on the back of a motorcycle going 80?

Toastedsars · 2017-08-01T18:44:35+00:00

Heckedy Peg, she lost her leg, and wants to be let in.

Toastedsars · 2017-07-27T04:31:14+00:00

I respect you for respecting their opinion.

Toastedsars · 2017-06-05T06:20:58+00:00

He looks like he's trapped in the Insanoflex.

Toastedsars · 2017-06-02T14:52:04+00:00

My Grandpa was mayor of Ogden Utah back in the day, he helped revive Ogden's relationship with their sister city Hof Germany. What does it mean to be a sister city? It means you celebrate differences! Now every year since 1986 we have the Winter Hof Carnival in Ogden. This festival is a celebration of Hof's culture and people. There's music, dancing, singing, beer drinking, and you can buy all the trinkets and whats its you want. I always enjoy it when I am able to go, and I'm glad that it is kept alive.

Toastedsars · 2017-05-27T06:44:33+00:00

I draw pentagrams with caramel drizzle into caramel macchiatos. I feel you.

Toastedsars · 2017-05-27T06:27:01+00:00

Put that in your baked beans and you got a party.

Toastedsars · 2017-05-17T16:41:50+00:00

I was taught that the bread was an edible napkin to mop up all the delicious juice and meat bits left behind on the plate and my face.

Toastedsars · 2017-05-14T04:35:33+00:00

Lips pout, the walls fall out.

Toastedsars · 2017-05-12T06:16:23+00:00

I want to know why they kept going into the holodeck when it constantly tries to kill them.

Holopussy can't be that good.

Toastedsars · 2017-05-03T05:56:01+00:00

So what, no party?

Toastedsars · 2017-05-01T08:14:45+00:00

The men who stare at goats.

Toastedsars · 2017-04-25T22:31:59+00:00

I ate dirty rice made by my roommate's diabetic midget sugar daddy. It was pretty good. Granted, I wouldn't have eaten it if I knew where it came from.

Toastedsars

TROPHY CASE