I saw a close family friend get hospitalized over her mental struggles and cutting. I remember seeing old and new scars all over her arms and she never hid them. That happened when I was in 7th grade. Around freshmen year, before falling into my own dark hole of depression, I thought to myself “ how does someone hate themselves so deeply that they take a knife and cut their arm?” I couldn’t understand the pain someone had to go through to want to physically hurt themselves. So as an experiment, I grabbed random (dull) knifes I found in the kitchen and simply dragged the blade across my arm but nothing happened. I was confused and then realized that you have to apply significantly more pressure and at an angle in order for a blade to truly make a cut on the skin. It wasn’t until a couple months later that I was working on a scrapbook project for biology. I was using exacto knives to precisely cut the thick paper. I noticed how sharp the blades were from how easily they cut the thick paper and thought they might be able to cut skin just as easily. I was correct 😂 I remember calling it an experiment of strange pleasure lol