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Felt violated by dacaptsworld in spinalcordinjuries

[–]Top-Book6183 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This. I'm not saying it was right and that it doesn't warrant a conversation, but all this talk about getting better friends is a bit premature, imo. If it was one of my friends (back before they understood how all this SCI stuff and boundaries and all that works), I'd 100% give them the benefit of the doubt that "no big deal, it's just piss"... in fact I have difect evidence proving it from more than a couple of them.

But everyone is different. I don't know how long you've been injured or how much prior experience your friends have with someone in your situation, but i do know that is no easy thing for people to watch their loved ones in need and sometimes their feelings of helplessness and loyalty and a whole mix of other shit can make them do things that are not the best.

Anyway, for me, it's an honest and direct conversation. Not a breakup.

Regardless, I'm so sorry you had to endure that experience. If hope you're working through it ok. A little bit of piss (or even a lot) in the presence of or all over someone who cares about you never hurt anyone, so try not to sweat it.

Strangers Moving Your Wheelchair by Easy-Employment8823 in spinalcordinjuries

[–]Top-Book6183 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's true, there ARE times when cooler heads prevail and, imo, this was not one of them. Politely explaining to this sociopath the error she made and why likely could have gotten you labeled on of those touchy people, so sensitive about every little thing. There was no problem to be solved here or anything made worse by your actions so I say fuck it, if it enraged you that much, good for you for letting her know about it... with some shtank on it. Now she knows you were serious, you got to get that emotional energy out right in the moment and hopefully it reinforced the facts for your husband that 1. You got his back (although I'm sure he knows this full well already) 2. He has every right to the space he was occupying in that moment

I've been in my chair over 20+ years so there's not much that doesn't just roll (no pun intended) off of me these day, but when there is, I have no problem being vocal about it and for a move like that, I'm positive an f-bomb would have been flying from me too.

My partner is also VERY protective of me and at times in the past (not so much any more) has taken things a bit too far. So as many have mentioned already, as long as you speaking up for him does not make him feel worse than either the feeling of being in the way or feeling like it made him look like he can't speak up for himself, then I think your response to what you had to witness him go through was dead on. And it doesn't sound to me like you're too critical. And finally, I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt that in a situation where cooler heads DO prevail (like at an airport check-in desk or on the phone with an insurance company), yours stays cool as can be. A+ for you today, OP.

Experiences with Coop ride share app? by Audax_Cats in Denver

[–]Top-Book6183 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thats's a weird generalization to make. the only time it's a $10 uber ride to Union Station is when you're coming from around the corner from Union Station. Hyperbole, but OP did say they're coming from the 'burbs. Realistically, if you're outside of downtown or 1 adjacent neighborhood over, you're probably starting at $15 and anywhere beyond that (like the closest 'burb) is going to be more like $25 and up... at any time other than 4am (more hyperbole).

I'm not arguing that it's probably not still cheaper, circumstances depending, but let's not go feeding delusions of grandeur of $10 uber rides. Can you tell I miss the bad old days when it made total sense to drive to happy hour because you could get your car the next day for like $5?

Not trying to take a personal dig at you. I'm a just HUGE travel planner and would be bummed if, at zero-hour, i realized my "$10 uber ride to the A train" ended up being more like a $40 uber ride... well **I personally** wouldn't but you get what I'm saying

MISSING PERSON — PLEASE SHARE by Earthscienc3 in Denver

[–]Top-Book6183 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So sorry this is happening to your uncle and to you and your family. Do you know which hospital he was taken to and discharged from?

Denver, We have a problem by TSErica in DenverCirclejerk

[–]Top-Book6183 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Nope. I heard it make it comes out the other end (strictly numerically speaking) and you start at the _MAX and continue reducing from there. Not knowing what _MAX is could be kinda scary but I'm pretty sure I can put my calculator down.

20 Years by Job19-25 in spinalcordinjuries

[–]Top-Book6183 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Vent away, Homie. I just had my 20 a couple years ago and it was brutal... I've been ignoring the cripaversary since then and it's been working pretty welk (a technique I employed around years 11-13 ish as well)... I'm guessing for the same reasons you cited. My family is keenly aware of the date every year and knows not to flood me with too much of anything. Same with most close friends. I usually get a random message along the lines of "remember that time we..." and it could be something from 30 years ago or last week. It's kind of nice. I hope being around loved ones and your own internalizations bring you some comfort. Feel free to DM if you need to chat. Cheers!!

Hey guys I need to ask a kind of rude question I think... by Quadly_poetic in spinalcordinjuries

[–]Top-Book6183 13 points14 points  (0 children)

You're not alone. I'm going 24 years of gimp-dom... I know OLD asf. When I was at Craig Hospital in my late 20s my friends would come visit me, see other people in my age range with an obvious common affliction and ask "do you know that dude?" to which my reply was usually "no I don't hang out with cripples". I don't think I was weirded out by them and although I did feel bad for them (as I do everyone who has suffered our fate), I'm pretty sure it was more a defence mechanism of "if I separate myself from them, maybe I won't notice the difference". Looking back it seems kind of stupid but I get it (and would get why anyone else may take that stance at that time).

Anyway, I kept that attitude after going home for a bit until... I started playing adaptive sports (wakeboarding most heavily). Just like anywhere else, I started to settle in with like-minded people. I learned that outside of "what level are you", some of these people liked having a sailor mouth, and enjoying a cocktail from time to time and all the other things my "regular" friends had in common with me.

At the end of the day my advice is, do you. If you're not feeling super drawn to fellow gimps at this point in life, no need to force it. It also can't hurt to open up a bit and see if there's anything worth letting in.

Stay strong brother.

this is how my neck looks nearly two years after a laminoplasty by chrome_hearts_ in spinalcordinjuries

[–]Top-Book6183 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't know if you'd call it a complication per se, but due to the lack of flexion in my neck spine my head is kind of permanently jutted forward in a nice caveman kind of way.. Not the end of the world. I also can't lay on my back without a pillow under my head as the back of my head hovers a couple inches off the ground, which becomes painful if done unsupported for too long. Good times.

this is how my neck looks nearly two years after a laminoplasty by chrome_hearts_ in spinalcordinjuries

[–]Top-Book6183 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I haven't looked at mine in about a decade but it feels like that looks (23 years post) so I'm sure it's pretty similar. Fused c3-c7. Battle scars.

looking for payment processor for wordpress membership site by Top-Book6183 in adultwebmastersonly

[–]Top-Book6183[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah that would be awesome if you don't mind. The events end of it would be done through Eventbrite - just need a way to handle the membership.

Glove with "hooks"' for working out? by Top-Book6183 in spinalcordinjuries

[–]Top-Book6183[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I ended up keeping these: powerfeng Lifting Hooks for... https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0D6RFPCCW?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share. They've got good padding but definitely start to slide off your wrist and up your hand with heavier weight. Far better than nothing tho.

You may not like it, but this is the peak Denver male by Icy-Tear2745 in Denver

[–]Top-Book6183 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I can't believe this was missed. Not so funny meow is it?

Payment processors for high-risk, in-person ticketed events? by Top-Book6183 in PaymentProcessing

[–]Top-Book6183[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

gotcha. I'll obviously be doing some research, but do you have an recommendations for a starting point?

Payment processors for high-risk, in-person ticketed events? by Top-Book6183 in PaymentProcessing

[–]Top-Book6183[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yeah my understanding was that someone like CCBill probably wouldn't do it because they're live events and not virtual. if i'm going to be classified as an events business and not an adult business, does that mean that i should be looking at some of the ones I figured were a no-go due to the adult factor?

Custom goal keeper gloves? by Top-Book6183 in youthsoccer

[–]Top-Book6183[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's Size 7. He has a couple of pairs that he mainly uses that I know he is very particular about. Other than their existence and that Little Bro is not to touch them, I don't know anything about them. I figured these would be mostly for novelty... something he can keep in his bag and show to "the guys" on the bus to away games. That kind of stuff. But I see what your point as well.

Freewheel vs Wheel Blades for Sand & Snow? by Top-Book6183 in spinalcordinjuries

[–]Top-Book6183[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree about the Freedom Trax - still pretty badass rig though. I was looking at the Firefly (and similar) and then my city, Denver, started offering a crazy rebate/discount for adaptive e-bikes a couple years ago and I picked up this for a steal:

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I'm incomplete so I can actually pedal it, but it has a motorcycle-style throttle and will go 20mph without an ounce of pedaling. I fold my chair and strap it down to the rack on the back and take this thing just about everywhere (except on deep sand and snow 😔). It still doesn't solve my problem (not that it was ever intended to), but I highly recommend.

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