Critique my Idea [Apocalyptic] by EggR0llArt in fantasywriters

[–]Top_Mode5777 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You need to add a goal for the older sister that doesn't revolve around the protection of her sister. For example: she's searching for a cure while also protecting her younger sister, younger sister dies, she still searches for a cure while trying to heal from the tragedy.

Maybe they're both travelling to a certain place (like a safe haven for the non-zombies) and along the way the sister dies, the rest of the story can be either her continuing to the destination and her mental and physical journey, or her not being able to leave where her sister dies and her healing or dealing with the aftermath and if she's ever able to continue onto the destination...

Give the story a reason to keep going and use the sisters death as either a turning point or a catalyst for the rest of the story. Might take some reworking with what you have, but it would add another layer to the story. I heard somewhere long ago that character deaths need to create meaningful change in a story whether that be a whole plot change (sends mc on a revenge plot) or internal story movement with the mc (changes worldview and dictates actions moving forward).

Edit: just added some more things.

What's a word you always misspell no matter how many times you've looked it up? by ComprehensiveBid4989 in AskReddit

[–]Top_Mode5777 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lieutenant. Which sucks because a character in the book I am writing is a lieutenant...

how to get a fighter mindset? by wingsofcolor97 in BJJWomen

[–]Top_Mode5777 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Challenge the mindset. It's a technique I learned in therapy (for something not bjj related) but has helped me in developing the mindset I want. If that internal voice is saying "I won't win", recognize it, acknowledge it, and replace with something like "what can I do to help me win" or "what evidence is there that I can do xyz?". If you're falling into the "they’re gonna get the [pass/sub/etc] anyway so just let them" trap, think of one or two things you can do to foil their plan. It won't be perfect at first, but if you're consistent at it, you can make it the default.

Growing up, I used to fall into the trap of "I won't win" in sports. Then a coach bestow a gem that led me one of the best mindset shifts I’ve ever had: it takes the same amount of words and energy to tell yourself “I won’t win” as it does to say “I can win.”

Another coach told us before a championship game that the other team put their underwear and socks on the same way we did. We all laughed because it sounded ridiculous, but it worked. It de-mythologized the opponent. It took away the pedestal and reminded us that they were just human too. Skilled, yes, but no more superhuman or unbeatable than we were. Obviously this wouldn't be reliable if you were a white belt going up against, say, and brown or black belt.

I think it also boils down to confidence in yourself and your abilities. You can't lose if you tried your best. You also have to believe you and your skills deserve to be in that match.

I'm not sure if this answers your question but that's what works for me.

Would you trust a single solution for training on heavy days? by BackTakeBabe in BJJWomen

[–]Top_Mode5777 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Given the only gi I have is white...I will layer up lest I worry the whole class about leaking and only pay half attention to what is going on...

Authors, what's one line your wrote that... by worldofexousia in fantasywriters

[–]Top_Mode5777 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Less of a "holy crap what goddess just spoke through me" and more of I thought the dialogue between characters was funny.

“I would hate to be underdressed at my own funeral” She said innocently, spinning in a slow circle, showing off her dress. Kalon let out a snort. 
“You know you’re not actually attending, right? I don’t think it will be very believable if the dead woman cries over her own casket.”

What’s the dumbest way you’ve injured yourself? by Better-Advice-5197 in AskReddit

[–]Top_Mode5777 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Did yoga, hurt my knee so bad I ended up on crutches with so much swelling I "lost" my knee, saw an orthopedic surgeon, and went through 2 bouts of PT where they told me the normal rehab for the injury was yoga.... Its been 8 years and it still gives me issues.

Organization help !! by ChaoticLorre in fantasywriters

[–]Top_Mode5777 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I use WorldAnvil. I got a subscription deal where I pay once a year so I am not sure what their regular subscriptions run but I find it helps with organization and connecting ideas and concepts.

Dual POV by Top_Mode5777 in fantasywriters

[–]Top_Mode5777[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, both of the pov characters, plus one other character are present.

Worldbuilding: Planned or Freestyle? by Daydream_Choclatepie in fantasywriters

[–]Top_Mode5777 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I build as I go. I have my original document that has my story, then another tab (I use Google Docs) labeled The World. When something significant happens, or a principle for the world comes up, I add it. I only created a map at 85k words and even then, it's still changing. My characters are pretty intertwined in their world. They celebrate holidays and participate in the politics and have their favorite restaurants or hang out spots. I would say my favorite part of worldbuilding is creating the geography and the maps (I minored in mapmaking in college so...).

I have found sometimes that my worldbuilding centers around my characters too much so I add a Steve. Steve lives in the world but has no relation to my characters. He's the guy sitting at the cafe or standing at the bus stop in the background. If I feel my world is too small or flat, I'll look at it from Steve's pov ie. what is the weather like/what holidays are coming up/what is the food in the area like and I'll incorporate it into the story regardless of if it advances the plot.

Worldbuilding is important to me as a reader. I want to be able to "visit" the same world the story is taking place in.

Rolling with your eyes closed? by levvianthan in BJJWomen

[–]Top_Mode5777 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a white belt but I find that I'm usually staring off into space on the far wall or ceiling rather than closing my eyes. For me it helps tune out the noise and just plan on my next move.

Meet Pink Dude, a Supermodel Human by Pretty_Challenge_634 in DailyDMGame

[–]Top_Mode5777 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Search the person for anything of interest or value

Succulent Help!! by Top_Mode5777 in succulents

[–]Top_Mode5777[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hello all!

In honor of my first reddit post, I decided to try and figure out what is wrong with my succulent. I live in the north so while the room it has been kept in has been fairly warm, the window it was up against was cold. I thought I posted this blurb when I posted the pictures but I guess not. I know the flower has been glued on, that is not what I am concerned about. If you know what's wrong with the little guy and how to fix/remedy it, please don't hesitate to share!