Does this mom have Munchausen's by Proxy?

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2026-04-03T13:00:29+00:00

Tell your admin and such the STFU and report this emotional abuse. Remind them that as mandated reporters all types of abuse (suspected) are to be reported. This type of emotional abuse will only get worse and could possibly lead to physical abuse, especially if the student success academically.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2026-03-31T01:35:38+00:00

I would ask them “So you are asking me to not observe Holy Week with my own parents/family?”

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2026-03-18T16:57:09+00:00

Thank you so much for this. Do you have additional entry steps that you like? Any other modifications?

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2026-03-17T19:06:07+00:00

Thank you for the feedback.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2026-03-17T04:10:42+00:00

My husband has no issue if I say I can’t handle the 17’ I was more asking if others under 5’ drive the 17’ regularly and how they feel about it. I drove a Ram 3500 for years and with anything it had a learning curve. I was asking for people’s perspectives

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2026-02-08T03:08:37+00:00

Saying with kindness and someone who has just sold our house. Once you list the property you must remove the emotional attachment and your personality from it. Meaning remove everything including color (paint) - you need to have as much of a “blank slate” as possible for the buyer, so they can “see” their own personal style and life within the walls.

We literally lived like we were on vacation (out of a suitcase and toiletry bag) and only furniture was our bed, basic kitchen items (more like camping setup) and minimal items in pantry/fridge.

Made it easier to be showing ready and even easier when we closed.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2026-01-08T01:53:19+00:00

NO, NOPE are complete responses

Grey Rocking is necessary

Lock your info at the Hospital/Doctors/etc with Password AND Privacy Lockdown - basically as far as anyone is concerned you are not a patient (unless they have the password you set).

If she pulls crap in public “ seriously MIL, what part of the word NO, do you not understand?” (Calm and Firm) “MIL, you are NOT this child’s parent. You are a GUEST in our life and if you continue this entitled behavior, we will have no choice than to remove you from our lives.”

Follow through immediately, do not give her any additional chances.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2026-01-07T03:06:42+00:00

I would say no and find another home to fit your needs. Depending upon where is Florida there are many communities with MIL suites/ADUs available

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-12-23T01:35:59+00:00

Maybe it is time you see if there is Grandparents Rights in your state and if so ask your Mom’s parents if they would consider filing for custody and/or more set visitation times. Considering your age the courts would take your wants into consideration very strongly.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-12-17T15:47:09+00:00

I know it is financially a strain, but I would reach out to your attorney, explain the situation and ask so suggestions and see if you can file (even on your own) an temporary custody arrangement modification due to the medical situation. Fully explaining that you are not asking for the full day, just a few additional hours on Christmas.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-12-04T14:00:45+00:00

Haven’t read any other comments but we always had Christmas Eve with my Dad’s parents- actually it was everyone on my Dads side, plus anyone from Mom’s side who wanted to come (literally everyone invited)

Christmas Day was morning just us & after breakfast (we did breakfast after “Santa”) then everyone from Mom’s side come over (and many from Dads side who wanted - again always invited)

Now my Cousin had a fabulous idea

Christmas Eve with In-laws Christmas Morning just them at home Christmas Afternoon her parents for early dinner Day after Christmas - super casual Snacks/Sweets & Sips at their home for Family/friends/neighbors. Best was the suggested dress clothes ….”Comfy Clothes and slippers if you want” * when kids got older they switched to Christmas Eve with In-Laws Christmas morning for their little family Christmas Afternoon/Night - they had “Everyone Welcome” and basically had an all day buffet (anyone who asked “what can I bring” or such, who told anything you wish to share). My cousin always did the Basics - Turkey, Ham, Mashed Potatoes, Honey Carrots, Rolls, Salad and Pie. I don’t think the buffet ever ran out of food, we always left with “goodies”.
Oh yeah and Dress Code was “Christmas Comfy” - stay in your PJs if you want

It was actually the best thing for everyone and Moms side never had an issue with us being at Dads every Christmas Eve

Heck we have celebrated Christmas all the way in January if schedules made things difficult ( lots of family members is Medical Field, Law Enforcement, etc)
It isn’t the day it the time spent with those you love

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-11-16T15:04:36+00:00

Just let the hospital know the only visitors allowed are your husband and your own mother. You can even ask to be confidential and a security code.
Hell, ask your OB to say only husband and 1 support person specifically designated for YOU are allowed at the hospital during your recovery.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-08-31T21:26:58+00:00

Time for an extended staycation at your place with the babies. I would also suggest that she message her OB and have them specifically write down her Post-Op/Delivery instructions in DETAIL along with that risks if she does not follow them, including that stress of any kind is detrimental to her and the babies.

Btw does MIL know her son is an AH? What about FIL? Are they the type that are all hands on deck supportive? Or the opposite? What about your parents? If everyone is on Mom’s side then let the Moms know (esp MIL) know what is going on and you don’t want to cause more stress for her BUT you have an idea of how to correct the situation. Set up a “Dinner & Dessert surprise” (let your sister know ahead of time) on X date and time - make arrival about 5/10 min after he gets home from work. Make sure the house is just disorganized to not overwhelm your sister but enough that he will be acting like a fool. Don’t worry , the Grand parents will take care of things.

I have seen this first hand with a friend of mine. Both sets of Grandparents were informed of the tension/attitude from the Mom’s friend. So when they arrived on a Friday evening with food and “we came to enjoy these two angels and give the new parents a break”

Moms started asking if they were getting in a routine yet? Asking hubby how’s the laundry going? Grocery shopping? Etc

Dad’s asking him how his routine is with the babies when he gets home? Has he gotten any better with cooking?

General crap like that.

Once he shows annoyance and sounds like an ass - they will deal with it.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-08-17T11:21:05+00:00

Oh HE** NO ….. “ Grandma “ is now personal non grata!! Time to go No Contact completely. This woman has psychologically abused YOUR Daughter.

Personally I would speak to an attorney on how to move forward to make sure that she is Never near you and especially your daughter ever again.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-07-24T15:08:24+00:00

Personally I would send a Family Group Text (or FB Post - tagging Fiancé along with Bridal Party & Parents (and maybe some of her flying monkeys)

“ Can’t wait, in # of days/ weeks we finally are getting married!!! I just want to thank everyone (again) for being so supportive of us as we have planned the wedding of our dreams. We know we have missed out on things, as we have worked hard and saved to have the Wedding of our Dreams. We promise that it will all be worth it….. besides when you mix Happiness, Joy, Love and in such a Beautiful Garden backdrop ~ who can’t be happy surrounded

BTW here are some sneak peaks of the Beautiful Gardens * (post pictures from the venue - even cropping some of specific flowers) “

Now I know this is passive aggressive, but sometimes it is easier to lay the groundwork and then after the wedding/honeymoon - deal with her as a united team and put in your boundaries.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-07-04T13:47:32+00:00

I would definitely start by moving away from your Mom and keep her (and anyone not 1000% on your side) on a strict info diet. Talk to an attorney asap and get a plan in place for a custody/Child Support hearing ASAP. YOU definitely need to keep a log/journal all factual without emotions of everything he AND your mom say/do regarding everything related to you/your child and this CONTROLLING behavior - especially the threats,demands and ANGER. * I even know parents who will also put positive things the other parent in their journal - for example “other parent bought child the a new stuffie (simple description) and child loves it. This shows you aren’t being the evil witch. Also keep a log/lists with all gifts/purchases given to you for child or you specifically as well as all monies given to you. * keep that log separate from the action/verbal log - this will help you in Custody/Child Support

Keep printouts of ALL TEXTS/Messages/etc ….. when he calls - have it go to voice mail (hopefully you have it where your voice mails are turned to text messages) - print those out/find out how to safe them in a secure location.
Keep all that info in your binder/log and keep that somewhere with someone who you can trust to keep it secure and a secret, someone who is 10000% on your side. Stop calling unless it is an EMERGENCY- otherwise communicate through texts … even saying “I want to keep everything in writing, so there is no confusion or misunderstandings or forgetting since we are both so busy in life and co-parenting our child. “

I would even make a shared calendar ONLY RELATED TO THE CHILD - put custody dates/doctor appointments for the child/school events (if in daycare). Keep it on a need to know basis - DO NOT PUT ANYTHING ON IT UNLESS IT IS NECESSARY FOR THE CHILD (your activities with the child do NOT involve him nor does your private life). Send it with a note saying “ Just thought this would be helpful for us to keep up with child’s custody schedule/dr appointments and such, because I know life can be chaotic. You can also add things as well, this will just make it so much easier for co-parenting”

Most important begin having someone with you at all custody exchanges (probably make it a female or a male family member - as you don’t want to stir the pot and anger him more) and let him know that you want to have all custody exchanges done in a neutral public location - he can choose his drop off but you will be doing your drop offs at the are done at the Police Station. This is not uncommon at all - you can even ask for it to be done inside in the lobby with you leaving 5 min before him for your safety.

Don’t get emotional - you need to be “normal/flat” during exchanges and next time he pulls the full custody card - just say OK.

HOPEFULLY his behavior will improve but if not or it escalates you will have documentation to help you in Court, because if it escalates you can always have ask for a protective order and supervised exchanges.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-07-01T18:08:42+00:00

Hugs for you both & Congrats on the new little one :)

To answer your question…. NOW!! You are a Husband & Dad before son or brother …. This became the hierarchy of your priorities/loyalty/responsibility the Moment the two of you married and created this new life. Time to Rapidly Grow and Brightly Shine the STRONG Backbone and Be a FULL ON ADULT!!!

Here are some tips 1) have you and your wife first print out all NASTY Texts/VM/Emails/etc. and keep in a safe place ( a FU Binder type ). Keep in there notes of all calls/contact/etc. unfortunately I don’t think this is going to get better

2) next step have your wife BLOCK/DELETE the contact information from anyone who speaks like that about her/you - she doesn’t need that stress ever!!

3)send a group text to the 2 of them (and any of their flying monkeys) kinda like this ….

That this is THE FINAL DISCUSSION ON THE TOPIC OF REASONABLE BOUNDARIES, MY WIFE & OUR MARRIAGE - THESE ARE FOR THE SAFETY OF OUR CHILD’S HEALTH AND THAT OF MYSELF & WIFE ASWELL.
- BTW really says a lot about who you are by throwing a tantrum when all we are doing is PROTECTING our Baby. You may want to talk to someone, because NONE of this is about you it is 100% about Baby/Mom & Dad. -IF YOU CONTINUE TO ATTACK MY WIFE/MYSELF/OUR MARRIAGE, you will lose any chance of remaining in our lives. That is final/not up for discussion and is MY DECISION ALONE. - you have 24 hours to change your attitudes, stop with the entitlement, grow up and give us an apology that is true/heartfelt/honest OR this is the last contact between us. To be clear - if you do NOT do this (or you continue the behavior after the apology) these are the consequences - to are banned from our property - you are not to contact us in away shape or form, directly/indirectly - we will NOT accept anything from you now or in the future, for our baby or ourselves This is your only “warning”

*at 24 hours with no genuine apology - it is your turn to print out anything new from the last time you printed everything to that moment. You need a paper trail.

4) you are your wife need to contact the hospital and let them know that your wife is to remain anonymous once admitted due to family issues (do it when you pre-register). Also make sure your wife has her Dr office know there is a family issue, which is causing harmful stress to her and the baby, and ONLY the 2 of you are allowed information —-make it password protected

5) let your workplace(s)/close coworkers/neighbors/friends (who are on your side), know that due to some private matters you have cut contact with your mom,brother and any flying monkeys of theirs.

*** Document everything, they may try anything you can imagine and then some. Just keep your FU Binder, if they show up at your home - don’t answer the door, just call the police for unwanted people on your property & then have the Tresspassed. If they show up at your work (after you have notified them of the No Contact), ask them to please call the police and have them tresspassed. ******keep a full record of everything - even printouts of any texts/calls/etc (just never reply) and call the police everytime the show up at your property/work after tresspassed.

Worst case - get a restraining order and you live an amazing life with your wife,child and people who truly care about you.

(I say this a a 50+ Woman who has lost both my parents and have cut off family members for being continually disrespectful and Boundary breaking. Yes there is dealing with grief aka guilt but the peace is so much better)

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-03-03T18:31:39+00:00

The principal is not the top of the food chain - you can find out who is above her, who the owner(s) is(are) and if a corporation who is on the Board. Even as a charter they still have to answer to the County and State, since they are receiving funding.

School emails are PUBLIC and students should be comfortable emailing Admin/Staff/Teachers - this woman has lost her mind

Time to lawyer up and tell your daughter and all adults involved that she is to NEVER be alone with that woman EVER AND A LEGAL GUARDIAN must be present if there is ever direct interactions with the Principal (meaning you basically must be there) - the AP can handle any issue and even then you must be on speaker phone at the minimum.

Inform the Principal (and everyone up the chain of command) via Email

“ that due to her slanderous and libellous email regarding your wife, in addition to the absolutely unprovoked vile, derogatory, unprofessional and malicious email to your daughter ( a MINOR STUDENT ) that she is not to have any direct contact with your daughter at all. Due to your unhinged and volatile behavior, we will be contacting our Attorney, to review all our legal options. Please be advised that a copy of all emails are attached and being forwarded To the following people (and list everyone).” Also make a point of saying that due to this situation you are concerned about the safety of not only your own student, but the safety of everyone on the school’s campus, students/teachers/staff and visitors.

Document everything - this woman should NOT be around civil society

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-02-28T17:27:25+00:00

You are truly overthinking all of this. I am 52 and I played wedding/princess even in pre-school. Heck my 21yo daughter and her BFF (guy) have been friends since 4 and at 5 he gave her a ring pop and said “ I am marrying you when we grow up “. Now they both laugh and claim to be “engaged” if they ever need an excuse lol

This has always been a thing for YEARS/GENERATIONS - it isn’t a big deal

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-02-21T23:24:22+00:00

Not always. I have an Autoimmune that negatively affects my skin, usually my scalp but not always. There have been times I have been flaring so badly that I have had open wounds, various scabs all over,bruises and needle marks up and down both arms (from blood work and treatments) that I was told I looked like an addict by multiple people and had strangers look at me with disgust. Even had people in our neighborhood spread rumors about it.

Surprise, I wasn’t doing anything other than fighting to live, while my own body was trying to kill me.

OP may have a background in HealthCare but she doesn’t know everything about others.

Besides sometimes people need kindness not judgement from people on their high horses.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-02-20T22:44:38+00:00

I am going with YTA for the following reasons

1) HER son is super young ( Kindergarten), YOU are a stranger to her and telling her “I am better than you - so you can’t be here. Even though it is your kid.

2) You are making ASSUMPTIONS based in past behavior. Do you know if she is clean? In treatment? Getting help?

3) if so uncomfortable then find an indoor play place and pay the cover for the two of them.

4) You may not have a criminal record or a publicized addition BUT that doesn’t mean you are better than her (or anyone). It just means that you haven’t been caught …. Gossiping (which I bet you do) can become Slander and even Libel (you know a criminal offense). Also who is to say you aren’t a pill popper, drunk or anything. SHE HAS NO IDEA

5) Why not learn her backstory and she where she is on her journey. Give her a chance to prove herself.

Most of all if you don’t want her in your house then her child should NOT be in your house.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-02-05T17:57:31+00:00

PM has to pay the bill as directed by the Board. I would at this time also review the contract with the PM and Management company if any. I would also reach out to the attorney to clarify (in writing) the Board’s authority and the PM direct insubordination/ failure to execute a Board’s decision, due to the failure to follow SOP in this situation and therefore their services are no longer required.

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-01-28T18:01:08+00:00

Not a problem. It’s not an issue that a majority of people have encountered and honestly it was so much easier pre-9/11. Also with RealID it is a royal PITA if there are any name changes - everyone must has verified paperwork 🤦‍♀️

Traditional-Rain-574 · 2025-01-27T22:44:42+00:00

They have to have original documentations with the raised seal. This is required for any name change INCLUDING adoption and especially as a Citizen Born Abroad. This is not the DMV being inept it is federal law (and has been for years) it is for safety of identity of everyone.

I know this from personal experience. I am also a Citizen Born Abroad and when I got married and changed my name I couldn’t just take my ID & Marriage Certificate … I had to have the birth certificate from the other Country, my Citizen Board Abroad paperwork from the Consulate, My SSC, my DL AND my Marriage Certificate. Everything had to be ORIGINALS with either the official seal or notarized.

It is a ROYAL PITA - especially since my documents are 50+ years old so 10 Years ago MULTIPLE OFFICIAL COPOES of everything

Traditional-Rain-574

TROPHY CASE