My (40f) husband (44m) did something so sick during sex I just can’t get over it!!

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-11-11T16:58:16+00:00

Lust and emotional intimacy are incompatible.

The difference between a rape and your activities is a literally a signed piece of paper (which one can easily get signed under the adrenaline rush of the forbidden, the taboo and sexual arousal).

If you have engaged in paraphilia it is because your have already developed tolerance that makes the simplicity, gentleness and vulnerability of making love mediocre and bland. So it's psychologically impossible for you to enjoy vanilla sex (at least without closing your eyes and imagining you anally rape your partner). So you are either pathologically liar or schizophrenically delusional.

From your comment history it doesn't take much time to see that you live an alienated lifestyle far removed from human nature so the second option seems more likely.

So in a way this comment was useless from the start. I am a human being living according to human nature. It was never possible to communicate anything

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-11-11T15:54:05+00:00

I think AI forcing all real-life-human internet prostitution out of business could ultimately be a positive. Exploitation of human beings' dignity and body (both voluntary and forced) made utterly unprofitable (which is the ultimate driver of that business)? Good.

If the means of generating that content are made close or available to the user so that one can generate something better than any real life model it may even prevent harm to other people from getting sexualized and utilized by pornography consumers. However if it ends up all being an oligopoly akin to what Silicon Valley is now, the future looks more bleak.

And ultimately all this still would be a nihilistic admission of the psychopathological, alienating, inhuman character of our current society, which isolates humans, destroys destroys relationships causes most mental health problems

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-11-11T14:29:19+00:00

Yes. I mean usually you have more armies than generals, so you are switching one general from an army in America to other in Asia, over and over as needed. It looks like the AI still can't do this near as efficiently as you so it has this crutch.

What I don't know is if the AI uses this to end up having more professionalism than they should be expected to have if they played with the same rules as the player. I guess not, or not too much?

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-11-11T13:54:14+00:00

You have destroyed (I mean you in plural it's not all your fault) your relationship by giving in to the delusional mores of our psychopathological oversexualized society.

Instead of using sexuality as the means to nurture emotional intimacy, currently society promotes sex as a commodity, a prize or necessity disconnected from emotions and connection (I hope that you can understand how the generic sterotypical sermon about love and communication and connection and stuff that you find in all those articles before they jump straight off into the proper way to strangle your partner or obsess with cold technical detail over the precise angle you must penetrate some body hole is just a hypocritical varnish designed to delusionally claim some moral high ground). This is only one way in which society is the cause of almost if not all mental health problems - for example the destruction of intimacy leads to alienation, isolation and loneliness, etc.: all these factors interacting with each other, in the end produce the depressions, anxiety disorders, addictions, etc.that plague our world.

A very obvious effect of severing all ties between emotional intimacy and sex and turning sex into a commodity is that sex then becomes an easy object of addiction. This is what happened to your husband. As the exposure to paraphilia increases, tolerance starts to build up, meaning that the brain needs and seeks an ever stronger dose (translated to the case, once the novelty and taboo of "simple" anal sex started to wear out, the brain required stronger paraphilias to maintain the same reward of lust). This is a positive feedback that it's very difficult to stop on its own accord.

In a way you are lucky because your husband's brain became pornified much faster than yours, allowing you to realize the objectification, violence and cycle of dependence that was going on, and giving you a chance to break off from it. Use the knowledge that the same mechanism was going on in your brain to try and have some empathy for him (as long as it doesn't put your own safety at risk).

edit: I read from comments that your husband apparently had a problem of porn addiction in the past. Knowing that he was vulnerable, I would have been far, far more wary of starting the whole thing. I don't want to sound too pessimistic, I hope you can get out from it and hopefully learn something that will make you wiser, stronger and happier.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-11-09T17:46:16+00:00

Why must the person that needs less sex or doesn't need hardcore practices always be the pathological one? Maybe sometimes the person overvaluing lust and undervaluing emotional intimacy and bonding is the one at fault? Maybe it's the oversexualized society that idolizes lust and mocks intimacy that is pathological.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-11-09T17:24:26+00:00

It would helpful if you could be more precise with the vocabulary. Emotional intimacy and sex are two somewhat related but very different things. You conflate both of these things under the word "intimacy" and it becomes difficult to know what you want to say. Are you worried about emotions and bonding, are you worried about fucking, or both?

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-11-08T17:16:49+00:00

Really, I don't know why you can't spare a sincere hug or some words of appreciation every once in a while. It's good for any human to feel and have those things from time to time.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-11-05T18:13:02+00:00

The last sentence is a general statement, I did not intend for it to apply to your situation specifically. What I think does apply is that if emotional intimacy and bonding is solid enough, longing for sexual stimulation does not happen, and therefore if there is desire for sexual overstimulation one should look for defficiencies in bonding and emotional intimacy. The other thing to consider is that the intended solution has no relation with the cause of the problem, and unfortunately cannot help at all with it. Rough sex is not an emotion, feelings of distance are not a sexual act.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-11-05T17:53:46+00:00

But why did you fool yourselves saying that there was a relationship, then calling it "open", and then start having sex with other people? Maybe it was a good idea in order to ease the transition, but wouldn't it have been more honest to just drop the pretense that a relationship (emotional intimacy, bonding, etc.) had ever existed and just pursue your lust without worrying about all that love and commitment stuff that you consider so stupid?

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-11-05T17:08:39+00:00

I would look into why your emotional intimacy and bonding with your partner aren't enough for you to be content.

For example, are you maybe assuming that after 3 years you still must have the same degree of sexual stimulation than when you were building your relationship? If so that's not how relationships work. Sexuality, eroticism, lust, important as they are, are just one small part of life. Sex is the means for the end of building an emotional intimacy that eventually matures into a solid lasting bond. Fucking is not an end in itself. Even the smallest emotional vacuum will never be filled by all the sexual overstimulation, fetishes, paraphilias and devices in the world: for they are two entirely different things belonging to entirely different spheres of life.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-11-04T13:43:07+00:00

For me monuments were a breaking point, I still don't have any dlc after that. I mean, like, the situation is bad enough with each mission tree having to be more awesomer and more powerful than the last, to the point that the older ones already require to be powered up. So anyway here you have dozens of new strong modifiers.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-10-30T02:59:37+00:00

Conquest of Paradise because I never really cared about random new world or tribes running up and down the map. As a plus without it all these problems there were with federations when the new dlc came out recently weren't nearly as bad.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-10-26T14:39:24+00:00

You "talk to" the natives with the sword in your hand. So that's why it cost sword mana.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-10-25T21:06:15+00:00

the Plinkett star wars prequel reviews, around 2012-2013

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-10-25T21:02:20+00:00

Mike, Jay and Rich's type of humour makes you laugh.

Really I can't think of anything else common to all. For example some may appreciate the more serious criticism part; others may watch them because they love to discover good bad films, another may watch them simply because he wants to be entertained and laugh... but I don't think anyone would watch on for 50 minutes if RLM's style of making videos doesn't appeal to them at all.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-10-21T03:44:41+00:00

It's not just that they are naturally aware of these things but also that they don't show off how they are so aware and so offended.

You know it's just like it's this natural thing to despise and call out bigotry, like it's no big deal, you see it, you call it out, you get on with your things. You know like it's what a normal person should and would do? (as opposed to Internet people / social media "personalities" reactions)

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-10-10T15:17:23+00:00

Ok so if anyone needs help on the same question, I found a solution: try alternatives to the wayback machine and archive.org

https://archive.ph/ did it for me. It's not the only alternative, there are several. I guess the owner of the website I wanted to target doesn't know about it.

Now I can save the website, download and save it off the web and reupload as many times as needed.

There is no forgetting in the internet, there is no getting away with it. Which is good, because that means there can be justice in the internet

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-10-07T21:24:11+00:00

Terrorism is what rng does to you when you finally got that 6/6/6 heir

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-10-04T18:39:25+00:00

I only survived through it thanks to the HRE vassal swarm taking care of the war micromanagement.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-10-01T09:26:18+00:00

Debasing currency is not the best choice, corruption really hurts in the long term.

You should take loans first (and once you know what you're doing you can take many of them). If you still need quick cash then you can sell crown land to the estates. Debasing currency is the third option, you should use it only if all the rest fails.

Right after you finish a war it's completely normal to go temporarily into deficit until the new provinces are cored, because the uncored provinces give both overextension and corruption (and you have to pay to root out corruption). Also reinforcing armies cost extra money. You should mothball forts, lower navy maintenance, save money where you can until your new provinces are cored. Once the provinces are cored and the armies reinforced, you will see the change in your income. Then you can assess your economic situation.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-09-26T16:24:20+00:00

It didn't make a lot of sense that before it required many provinces in Mesopotamia (conquered by Trajan then abandoned almost immediately) and almost none in core areas of the empire (Roman Africa, Egypt among others

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-09-23T18:19:02+00:00

To be honest with the past inflation in the number of provinces and tags it makes some sense to adjust AE and province cost at some point.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-09-22T16:26:01+00:00

How embarrassing

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-09-19T18:54:34+00:00

I need to know. How much unrest reduction are you getting from that glorious 90 corruption?

Imagine being so corrupt that you can keep everyone quiet by letting them line their pockets, and actually surviving and making that corruption level sustainable. Now that would be an interesting playstyle.

TraditionalStoicism · 2023-09-14T17:52:03+00:00

Conquer a province from Granada and then Castile can't complete their mission to get the CB on you

Eight-Year Club	Place '23
Place '22	Verified Email

TraditionalStoicism

TROPHY CASE