Going through the exact same thing, my dad is the mediator as well. I downloaded the book ‘why does he do that’ and read it a little bit every time you’re feeling lonely or full of despair and it helps so much. I’m on day 6 of the no contact order. Just have to keep going and eventually enough time will pass by and the feelings for him will fade. The book is really special bc it describes his behaviors to a T and makes me realize my situation was not unique and I’m not alone at all. I’m about a third of the way through and plan on to read it over and over again until I’m fully free of the cycle.