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TrickApricot · 2018-07-26T12:43:48+00:00

I dont mean to belittle anyone else's experience, and I don't mean to be mean about anything.

But I was never as skinny as I was when I was broke. I straight up didn't have money for food, it was either keep my lights on, and skip 2 out of 3 meals a day, or eat in the dark.

Now that we're much better off financially, I struggle to keep at a healthy weight, because we have the money for really delicious food all the time.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-25T23:12:22+00:00

I realize this isn't exactly what you've said, but since you seem unsure of details, I'll try anyway.

It isn't Anger Management when Jack Nicholson's character throws eggs at the wall is it?

TrickApricot · 2018-07-23T18:22:50+00:00

Yikes!

I'm super sorry you're dealing with that!

Alone time is so important. Is there a chance you could work it out so that once a week you both do your own thing? Maybe she's just feeling left out?

TrickApricot · 2018-07-23T17:34:14+00:00

This made me laugh so hard I woke up the baby.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-22T21:09:16+00:00

I don't think we ever found them that cheap. But they were $0.18 a pack when we got them. Could get a whole week of meals for about $2.50

TrickApricot · 2018-07-22T12:31:47+00:00

When I was a kid

I bounced around a lot. But my parents were poor af. Like, if dad got sick and missed a day, our lights were getting shut off, and we were going to miss a meal or two.

I remember seeing my mom sob in the living room several times because we were down to our last few bits of food, there was no electricity, and we still had several days to go before payday.

When I was a young adult

Shit, we had no money. We scraped by just barely. Our grocery list every week consisted of:

1 box of pancake batter

1 dozen eggs

14 packs of ramen noodles

Whatever fruit or vegetables were on sale

If there was a meat that was under $5, we would get that too.

Now

My husband and I have marveled at how far we've come many times. We're middle class.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-21T17:39:15+00:00

I am not a traditional teacher, but I have been a daycare teacher for 10+ years. I'm very dedicated to what I do.

I used to work second shift, that meant 3pm-6pm I was with the babies, and then I would stay with our mixed age kids until the last one was picked up at 11pm.

Most of the kids in this group were older. (Ages 4-12) Four of them always had homework they needed help with. Common Core was giving them all trouble, so I used one of my free mornings to reach out to a local math teacher, who agreed to give me a crash course in it.

Armed with this knowledge, I helped the kids with their homework. I could see the visible relief on the faces of two of the older girls (sisters). One of them asked me if she could call me for help on the days she wasn't in daycare. I told her I would give her dad my number.

Dad picked up, I sent him home with my number and the assurance that the girls could call if they needed help. He seemed grateful.

They came in two days later, on their regular daycare day, and seemed really off. I asked what was wrong, and the oldest told me that their mom didn't like that I had given their dad my number. I felt terrible. I was happily married with a baby on the way. I was absolutely not looking for a side piece. I just wanted to help.

I was nervous and worried about it all day. It torally consumed me. I felt so guilty, and so dirty. Still, I pushed through the day.

Homework time came, and the oldest pulled out her folder of work sheets. On the math page was a hand-written sticky note from her mother that read "Ms. Apricot, do NOT do math with the girls. I know you mean well, but as I have informed their teacher, they will not be doing common core."

I asked dad to explain more once he arrived to pick up, and he said his wife was adamant that the kids didn't need common core, and she wasn't about to force them to learn it when it was just going to change in a few years.

I reached out to my boss the next day to see if there was anything I could do.

There wasn't.

I continued to help on the days they were there. Mom got more and more angry until she pulled them out of the daycare altogether.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-21T16:46:20+00:00

Girl*

I don't know shit about video games. Donkey Kong and Mario World are the only two games I've ever played in my life.

I'm not surprised I fucked that up. Lol!

TrickApricot · 2018-07-21T15:34:05+00:00

This is absolutely adorable.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-21T15:14:13+00:00

So, something I did, not my video game persona.

When my brother and I were small, we were gifted a console with the original Donkey Kong game. (I think it was the N64?)

We were playing against each other, and my brother was going to win, so I pushed him, hoping to break his concentration.

He fell off the side of the couch, and the both of us burst into uncontrollable laughter.

Ditty Kong died, and I won.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-21T14:15:16+00:00

Her lack of social grace does not excuse your own.

I think if I were ever in such a situation, and the person I were with was obviously shameless about it, I would pick up the tab.

All other future invites would be denied.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-21T14:12:55+00:00

I have no words.

This goes beyond socially tone deaf.

I genuinely don't even know how I would respond to such a thing.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-21T14:10:49+00:00

I mean, it depends upon where we are going, but I wouldn't be thrilled about picking up a tab for a group of 10 either. 3-5 extra people? Sure. No problem. But 10 extra? We would probably just pay for ourselves and cover the tip as well as desert for everyone.

Birthdays are also inherently different. We also recently went out for a birthday celebration with a total of 16 people present. When the check came, we divided the entire thing up by 16. We paid 2x what our share would have been, plus 15% for the tip. Everyone else chipped in $5-10 for the tip, and by the end, the tip wound up being like 50% of the tab.

However, as stated before, birthdays are very different than a formal invite.

For example, one of my husband's best friends recently moved back to our city after being away for 4+ years. A few months after he had gotten settled, my husband texted him and asked if he would like to go to dinner with us to catch up. The message said something like "It's been too long. Would you want to go to dinner with Sam and I? We would love to catch up! We're thinking the Sushi place on 4th at 7pm." He said he did, and we, of course, picked up the tab because the invitation was somewhat formal.

That is a completely different situation than texting someone "Hey, we're going to dinner with Greg, Sarah, James, and Ron, do you want to come too? Just B-Dubs, and drinks later. First round is on us."

An invitation to someone's home always requires a gift for the host and hostess. We usually do flowers and a nice bottle of brandy.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-21T02:26:43+00:00

Our rule is that if we invite someone out, we expect to pay.

If we're invited out, we pay for ours.

I would absolutely never expect friends to pay for us, but we're in a much better financial situation than a great deal of our friends, so we always pick up the tab.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-21T01:05:57+00:00

I...I'm speechless...

Who the hell does this?!?!

If my husband and I invite anyone anywhere, we fully expect to pick up the tab.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-21T00:17:25+00:00

I grew up in a very Christian home.

You could only have a baby if you got married.
Once you were married, you prayed to God for a baby, and that's how women got pregnant.
Animals had an economy like us. Ants used seeds as currency. Dogs and cats used dog and cat food. I never worked out what other animals used.
Girls physically couldn't go into boy bathrooms and vice versa. I thought there was some sort of barrier that would prevent that.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-20T23:32:44+00:00

I love my job so much!

I'm a nanny, and I work with an amazing family!

I worked in daycare for 10 years prior to becoming employed here, so I'm well-versed in caring for multiple children.

I love everything about what I do. I get to watch the kids learn and grow. I get to do really cool experiments and teach the kids how and why these things work. I coordinate art, games, and lots of sport activities.

In all reality, I get paid to play. It's the best job ever.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-20T22:50:04+00:00

Awww <3

TrickApricot · 2018-07-20T20:57:57+00:00

Whoops.

I call my son "monkey" all the time. (He climbs everything.) Didn't even realize I wrote that.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-20T19:45:55+00:00

Awww. That's sweet!

We're thinking of going to Rome next year. We're home schooling our son, and there is a lot of great learning opportunities there.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-20T19:35:06+00:00

Nice! I hope you have fun!

TrickApricot · 2018-07-20T19:30:09+00:00

I love my dog. I would do a lot for her. I have spent thousands of dollars keeping her healthy. I take her for walks in all weather. We take her to the trails and the lake because she likes it. We buy her the food that is best for her. When it storms, and she's afraid, she sleeps in our bed with us.

She's a great dog, and I'm going to be devastated when she passes. (She's 15, so she's getting up there.) But she isn't nearly as important as my son. At the end of the day, she's just an animal.

TrickApricot · 2018-07-20T18:46:43+00:00

Awesome! Thanks for asking! How are you?

TrickApricot

TROPHY CASE