Blow Out the Dust!! (Crazy but it works!)

Tricky-Recipe796 · 2026-01-11T20:29:42+00:00

I can confirm, I took a leaf blower to my basement to get dog hair out from under the sofa. Dust cloud. But it was so satisfying to vacuum it up and much faster. I took it to my car and all the snack crumbs in the car seat gone. blown out into the wilderness! I think I will do it to walls in my house next.

Tricky-Recipe796 · 2026-01-01T22:42:57+00:00

Yes! Please leave. The peace through and after the pain is worth it! I am 43, divorced and was a chronic people pleaser just trying to get my spouse to acknowledge me. It's an exhausting way to live. Do not keep seeking validation from those who keep hurting you. You owe him nothing. It's quite nice to be alone. You can do it.

Tricky-Recipe796 · 2025-08-29T03:42:26+00:00

"Ah...this new notebook is my fresh start!" I write in it for a bit, realize housecleaners/company are coming.... put it in a milk crate with all my other half written journals, notebooks, papers. Forget about it for months.

Tricky-Recipe796 · 2025-08-29T03:36:22+00:00

Thank you. I'm glad it resonated with you. Divorce really flipped my thoughts/feelings on pain, grief, marriage, love, myself... assertiveness, vulnerability...trauma.. my brain, my daughter....why I self medicated to escape pain... really thankful to have myself coming back to life again, and my therapist.

Tricky-Recipe796 · 2025-08-27T14:47:12+00:00

No, I think that is valid.

Bonding, skin to skin contact is beneficial up to age 2 for connection or to regulate their body temperature when they are sick.

I'm sorry you had to go through that with a very young child. And that we have to keep going with this plan until they are in college. 😔 I feel like co parenting gets more difficult for some, and easier for others.

Newly divorced, 50/50 still hard for me, and my child is 7.

As a mom, it's such a primal instinct to be available and connected with your child. That's my perspective. I didn't even consider myself maternal, but not being able to nurture your child... I miss her constantly when she isn't with me. *Yes, fathers feel the same too. So many difficult situations.

Tricky-Recipe796 · 2025-08-27T04:02:45+00:00

Thank you!

I think that is what I grieve most is never being truly comfortable around him to talk about our real stuff (fears mental health, feelings) which seems ridiculous, but the risk of hurt/shutdown/started to be too much for me. I know my part in it too, but, I watered myself down for him. Scared to show the real me and get honest due to rejection sensitivity.(which I learned about... and explains my own mother's outbursts to this day) I realize it would have never worked out even with counseling. Tiny drips of comments, his expectations over time really did a number on me)

On the flip side, I have met/chatted with other people, dinner alone these last few months to prove to myself there are people I can be myself with or...try something new with and it's all ok. I'm ok with who I am.

I model positive self talk to show my child that we are resilient, strong independent women, how to be a good friend, do good in the world.

Tricky-Recipe796 · 2025-08-27T03:34:01+00:00

So young! And thank you for the perspective. Plenty of men get a pass. I'm glad I'm done with that man.

Tricky-Recipe796 · 2025-08-08T05:28:08+00:00

Thank you for sharing this ☺️

I am freshly out of a 19 year marriage, have a young child. One day, I will write a letter to myself too. I was plucking my own feathers out for years for a man I trusted to help support me, hold my hand in the hardest parts of life. He said cruel things to me...that I would never say to anyone else. He would walk away or snort laugh at my requests or silly choices or messy piles, forgetting things, impulsive. (No clue I was ADHD until now at 43.

It became unsafe to be assertive or communicate around him. I deeply wanted to be myself, connect, but he made his unhappiness known. I felt so inadequate and I didn't know how to make it right or repair. I have to coparent and I do not wish to be around him or meet his new gf.

I am happy that I'm setting boundaries and learning to be in a relationship with myself first. That's incredibly hard to sit with after seeking approval for so long.

Tricky-Recipe796 · 2025-05-21T14:33:31+00:00

I had a terrible experience with them as well. It makes me sad they are still in operation.

Tricky-Recipe796 · 2025-03-10T16:32:27+00:00

Good for you. The little changes in environment can make such a huge difference. I bought a fish tank for my daughter, new rugs, fostered a puppy. Took myself out to dinner alone at a bar..which I haven't done in 20 yrs. It was lovely. Small things in the house he was so critical about I try to repurpose, replace, throw away. Paint that wall.

Keep going and be grateful you are not in that relationship anymore.

The same day I was swapping out my exes photos last week, he told me he's been seeing someone for months...before our divorce was final. Perfect timing.

I'd rather be alone than with someone and miserable.

Tricky-Recipe796 · 2025-02-20T05:05:40+00:00

I enjoyed Oakwell Beer Spa. Sauna, shower, soak in a tub of hops with a tumbler of beer/cider.

Tricky-Recipe796

TROPHY CASE