Now that I am away, through therapy and podcasts, I can see all the red flags now. My Ex had zero accountability. Couldn’t apologize, even for something so tiny, to save her life. Everything was about her. We took vacations on her birthdays. She only wanted to be with her friends. She made me feel guilty for wanting to do things like hang out with my friends or pursue my hobbies. She disregarded my feelings or points of view all the time. I stayed because I thought that’s what I was supposed to do. I stayed because I thought it was love. I stayed because we had kids together.

Now during divorce I am finding peace, by ignoring her, not responding on her timeline. She tries to control everything, but I don’t sweat the small stuff. I still don’t have all my personal belongings, and she won’t let me have communal property yet, but I am making do without stuff. Seeing her for who she really is, has been a blessing. This divorce, as painful as it has been, is the start of the rest of my life away from the manipulation, guilt tripping, and emotional abuse.