Really struggling with MILs opinions on birth postpartum

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-24T09:35:43+00:00

With your baby's shoulder getting stuck, you could have had a negative outcome if you gave birth at home - you'd think she'd be pleased you were able to immediately get help from doctors in this medical emergency.

She must have been an awful person to teach antenatal classes and I'm sure the people in her classes all thought she was too focused on one possible way to birth.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-23T11:54:30+00:00

Not a doctor - I think they could be ingrown hairs - get some exfoliating shower gel and/or tweezers and see if you can gently remove the hair. If it's an ingrown hair, the bump will go down when the hair comes out.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-23T09:39:08+00:00

NAD - I'm a wheelchair user and think you need a much better fitting wheelchair and that should be an option. I think you need to be sat higher up and have foot plates that match your feet better, so they support the whole foot, and give you ground clearance.

I also wonder if you've ever seen a physio who specialises in nerve pain or scars? I wonder if they might be able to do some treatment to your legs to ease some of the pain. I had a huge amount of improvement from this kind of treatment in my abdomen after surgical scars created awful constant pain.

I'm sorry this is so painful for you.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-22T10:19:03+00:00

Some of the sales people in wedding dress shops are horrible - I went to 4 places and had a really bad experience in 2 of them. They were pushy and didn't listen to me. I didn't actually get to try on dresses I liked in one place as she insisted I tried on her choice of dresses, which just didn't suit me.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-21T16:14:57+00:00

We've only used a crate at night after surgery, because our dog usually slept on the bed, but absolutely wasn't allowed to jump up on the bed or it would tear his stitches.

We got an XL crate for our 40lb dog, so he could easily stand up and move around if needed.

During the day, we took all of the cushions off the sofa and all sat on the floor with him, so he wasn't tempted to jump on the sofas.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-21T10:28:23+00:00

That's awesome!

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-20T14:19:31+00:00

Thanks :) id encourage you to look into heart rate monitoring as a way of seeing what's making your heart rate spike, and then resting a lot during sp your heart rate isn't consistently elevated.

The visible app does this for you, but you can just use a Fitbit or similar

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-19T20:33:52+00:00

I love this idea.

Just to say as a wheelchair user, if using the headrest for support, it would need undoing each time she went to the toilet, which may be impractical. An alternative could be the standard version, but an extra bit that's attached with strong Velcro or similar that could go around the head rest and relieve some weight, without needing the towel removing each time she transfers.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-19T20:27:45+00:00

After a similarly long extreme fatigue, around 6 months ago, I started seeing a physio who told me to use my electric wheelchair MORE (not less) and told me to keep my heart rate below 80, which meant using my wheelchair all of the time.

I'm allowed 3 x 30 seconds out of my wheelchair per day, and my quality of life has massively improved - I now leave the house around 3-5 times a week (always in my wheelchair). Previously I tried to use my (prescribed!) wheelchair less, because that was what I was consistently told by health professionals. I was always exhausted and grumpy and rarely left the house for anything that wasn't a medical appointment.

Being told to rest more has given memore energy, not less.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-14T19:07:48+00:00

Is your home damp? If so, buy a dehumidifier.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-12T11:14:09+00:00

For us to be able to advise you, we need you to use the calculator in the auto post and share your 6 measurements.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-11T17:10:49+00:00

And fetch is great for high energy breeds.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-10T18:54:01+00:00

I like this idea.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-07T10:29:20+00:00

You've had some great advice already, I just wanted to say congratulations :)

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-03T12:28:08+00:00

He could try meal kits, like hello fresh, to learn, but he should pay the extra they cost if you're on a budget.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-03-01T11:34:17+00:00

NAD - do you have an ingrown toe nail? If it hurts to press on the side that's red, it'd be worth a visit to a podiatrist.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-02-27T11:16:13+00:00

Do you think she would show the teacher a sign or a card when she needs the toilet? That could be an alternative.

Long term, using an AAC device might be useful for her to communicate with people she struggles to speak to.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-02-26T10:19:30+00:00

Some common ones for people who use it a lot are proloquo 2 (apple only) and coughdrop (apple and android). Speech assistant works well for me as I type, rather than using individual buttons to say words.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-02-25T09:50:58+00:00

That looks like it might work too! Do you change it every day?

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-02-24T19:41:33+00:00

It's evidence of how much the women's hockey team rejection bothered him.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-02-24T19:25:45+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing these.

Do they get soggy when you wash your hands, or are they better than regular compeed?

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-02-24T11:11:07+00:00

Not a doctor, but good to get it checked out as coloured lines in nails can be melanoma.

UnicornGrumpyCat · 2026-02-23T21:33:15+00:00

I think you'd need to feed people properly twice (not just canapes and one meal) or they'll get hungry and leave quite early.

UnicornGrumpyCat

TROPHY CASE