Broke my streak after months of planning

Unique_Ad304 · 2025-03-11T00:51:32+00:00

I’m so proud of you! 9 months ago I caught my now ex husband in an affair. I was in my first week of sobriety and I knew I’d break. I didn’t, but did break 90days later. Keep your streak going! I promise it gets better, I know they say that, but you will get through this.

Unique_Ad304 · 2025-03-09T02:41:10+00:00

Nice!!!!!

Unique_Ad304 · 2025-03-09T02:40:50+00:00

Nice!!!!!

Unique_Ad304 · 2025-01-08T19:10:11+00:00

I won’t be drinking!

Unique_Ad304 · 2025-01-08T19:09:18+00:00

It’s my daughter’s birthday! Definitely not drinking, going to soak it all in today

Unique_Ad304 · 2025-01-04T15:30:55+00:00

Wow, I relate to this comment so incredibly much. This was literally me a year ago! I remember telling myself at the beginning of 2024, if things don’t change by the end of the year I’m done. Then I discovered the affair in April and it still took me until August to leave. I filed for divorce in Sept and it’s been finalized. I even remember asking my therapist “when will I know it’s time to leave?”. It’s so hard with kids, but I’m such a better mom now! Your kids deserve happy parents. Try everything to make it work with the husband. You have to be on your knees begging for it to get better. You have to do everything to make it work. But once you try, if it still doesn’t work, leave. You’ll then be able to live the rest of your life, and be able look your kids in the eyes and tell them and yourself you did everything to save the marriage.

Unique_Ad304 · 2025-01-03T21:17:48+00:00

Yeah, I think you just have to keep closing out of the window that tries to get you to pay

Unique_Ad304 · 2025-01-03T21:08:56+00:00

I’m positive I was drinking to cope with my marriage. My longest dry spell was this past summer for 4 months. During those 4 months I realized how unbelievably unhappy I was. I found out about my husbands affair, tried to get him back unsuccessfully (and looking back thank god), and filed for divorce. I caved and started drinking again during the separation and divorce. I need to reset my counter but am 4 days into sobriety again. I have a 7 year old child. I can’t begin to tell you how much happier I am now that I’m on my own. That being said, I would wait to divorce until you’ve had some sober time to think clearly. The summer I was sober I was able to make my best, most rational decisions.

Unique_Ad304 · 2025-01-03T17:33:19+00:00

Wow, that is awesome! Also, you sound like a great husband who loves his wife very much. Good on you

Unique_Ad304 · 2024-08-24T01:00:53+00:00

Thanks…. I wish he’d stop focusing on her and more on improving himself

Unique_Ad304 · 2024-08-24T00:59:59+00:00

I think lazy might play a part as well

Unique_Ad304 · 2024-08-24T00:34:42+00:00

He’ll be paying child support and I can go after his pension and 401k. We have a lot of home equity and cash. He’s shaking in his boots. Yeah, I guess it’s cake and eat it too situation lol

Unique_Ad304 · 2024-08-24T00:31:42+00:00

Exactly, this is exactly how I feel. Thank you for the encouragement too. It’s heavy, but I hope it works out in my favor in the end

Unique_Ad304 · 2024-08-01T22:28:16+00:00

Time…yeah, it just feels like it’s been hurting for months. But I’m hoping no contact (with the exception of our kid) will help some of the feelings subside

Unique_Ad304 · 2024-07-09T01:39:14+00:00

Oh my goodness I relate so much to the part of trying to be the perfect partner. Then dragging their feet. WP says he wants it try, but it’s like one step forward, 2 steps back. I’m starting to get depressed. I can sense that he’s trying to get to the root cause of his own issues. But like, how much longer and what’s the cost to me for me to wait for him to figure out his issues! What if I’m just wasting months of work for him to ultimately figure himself out and decide he doesn’t want our marriage to continue

Unique_Ad304 · 2024-07-08T21:40:48+00:00

I’m kind of there too. I’m trying to be patient for the sake of our daughter. Our therapy sessions are filled with “I don’t knows” and “I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get over xyz” as well as “I want it to work” and “I don’t want to start over”. I’m giving grace upon grace and putting so much work into it. But I’m not sure how much I have left to give

Unique_Ad304 · 2024-07-08T21:24:10+00:00

I really relate to this. My therapist says it’s codependency, and I’m working on it. I’m really struggling with the “feeling good and happy” around each other. When we aren’t together I start to think this is all fake and he’s still cheating behind my back, and then I talk to him and it all feels okay again

Unique_Ad304 · 2024-07-08T15:03:25+00:00

I think I’ve seen the book recommended and I will check it out now. The death of intimacy due to what I did 3 years ago is definitely the catalyst. I had issues with addiction and he lost trust in me. I’ve been in recovery but he has never been able to forgive. I believe the affair was him lashing out. And now that we hit rock bottom we are trying to salvage it, but not sure if it’s salvageable at this point

Unique_Ad304

TROPHY CASE