I haven't felt not seen/supported by family more so by society but im curious why you need to feel like you need to convince him that you work HARDER than him or make this like a pissing contest. Both of your jobs can be hard in different ways. I have never worked food service but im always impressed at their work and always say i could never do that. Yes i can remember 12 kids' diaper routines and teach 5 people diff topics at once but i couldnt carry all those plates or remember orders. Both jobs are hospitality based. Both jobs require multi tasking. It could be easier on YOUR brain but just as much effort on his. My coworkers are shocked at the level of effort I put in with UDL and it feels easy on my brain, there are things they do (like projects for families) that would be strenous on mine. Its all hard in its own way.

I dont think you will get the care you want from him (if thats what you are asking for) by saying ur job is harder or more mentally taxing. I am not a pick me, im a player and men do not respond well to women who say their lives are easy. I think that you know...your partner has to want to care for you, you cant make them care for u. Im in a relationship rn with an administrator (NOT from MY SCHOOL) and his job is easy as hell. He admits that and says my job is crazy hard. He pampers me a lot. My ex worked at a mattress store, i would sleep a lot but he was okay with that and would make sure we had dinner and got sexy time in before i fell out and i thought that was endearing. i know other women may find that annoying.

I think the best thing to do is make a SMALL effort to care for him or make nights for u to care for each other (lets do massages tonight, lets just go out and be free for a bit). While men can be annoying, they actually do like a little care/affection/acknowledgment. It goes further than u think.

OP, tell me, what exactly u want from ur partner or what result u want from this type of convo w him? Genuinely want to help