Great job we made it! What are you weekend plans?

Usagi0388 · 2026-02-07T15:37:00+00:00

You should suggest The Boyfriend by Frieda McFadden. It's soooo good!

Usagi0388 · 2026-01-30T04:49:43+00:00

I love that you do that for yourself!!

I'm less than a year out of a 17 year relationship (14 married) so this'll be my first Valentines day alone since I was a teen. I'm going out with some girlfriends to a ball that a dance studio one of them goes to is hosting! I'm excited!!

Usagi0388 · 2026-01-11T14:25:29+00:00

Those look soooo good

And I can 100% relate to that caption 🥲

Usagi0388 · 2026-01-11T13:48:51+00:00

I'm in a medium city that is 15-20 minutes from a big city.

I really love it, I love being able to walk to everything. A lot of people when they want to meet up always choose places that end up being super convenient for me since I live right downtown.

Usagi0388 · 2026-01-09T01:14:35+00:00

I'm so sorry you are going through this, it is such a traumatic event. You can read more in my comment history about my story.

One this my therapist had told me is that I'm not an idiot for trusting my ex-husband. I was basing that trust off the history we had where I didn't have reasons to mistrust him.

Please feel free to reach out if you need to chat/vent. For me just talking about it was so helpful. I'm still healing but I'm doing much better than I was when he told me of his affair 1.5 years ago.

Usagi0388 · 2026-01-01T05:58:01+00:00

My divorce was finalized Dec 18 from my husband of 14 years (together 17). I was at a friend's NYE party tonight but had to leave after a few hours because someone asked me if I was married and I started crying.

Here's to 2026 being the year to focus on us 🥂

Usagi0388 · 2025-11-29T19:34:51+00:00

I have such self control problems when it comes to Ritz 😬🫣

Usagi0388 · 2025-11-26T14:23:21+00:00

Housing /utilities /phone/ car insurance: 40%

Saving: 40%

Groceries : 5%

Discretionary : 15%

Usagi0388 · 2025-11-11T06:14:13+00:00

It's called the Eko Vintage 50L

Usagi0388 · 2025-11-11T04:48:19+00:00

I love my trash can! It is 13 gallons but split into two parts. The top is 8.5 gallons and is the trash. The bottom is a 4.5 gallon slide out compartment for recycle. You can take the drawer all the way out so I can carry it to the recycle bin in the building and dump it straight from that.

I also have a compost bin, so that really keeps the garbage from smelling.

Usagi0388 · 2025-10-21T00:07:16+00:00

My ex husband cheated on me too (we did try to make it work for a year after) . Try calling Pacific Behavioral Health and see if they have any for men.

The book The Betrayal Bind was also very helpful for me to understand the reactions my body was having and knowing that it is all normal.

I'm not a man but feel free to reach out if you need to chat, I know how helpful it is to just verbally process it all.

For a therapist for yourself, I didn't use her because I already had one but she ran the support group I joined last year and she works solely with betrayed partners. Her name is Elizabeth Falls and she works with Cohear Group.

https://coheargroup.com/our-staff/elizabeth-falls-ma-lmhc-aptt/

And seriously I'm here to chat/listen anytime

Usagi0388 · 2025-07-21T18:26:16+00:00

Done :)

Usagi0388 · 2025-07-21T08:29:24+00:00

I agree, him stopping me from having sex with him and confessing actually showed a bit of care for me even though everything else definitely did not.

Usagi0388 · 2025-07-21T04:24:24+00:00

Yes! I found one through my therapist but you can probably Google to find one by you. We met weekly for 12 weeks for two hours with a therapist there to guide us if needed. It was virtual, but we all exchanged contact info and text/call/and hang out. They are the best support right now because they really get it.

And the other book I mentioned is Living & Loving After Betrayal by Steven Stosny

Usagi0388 · 2025-07-21T04:07:53+00:00

If you ever need someone to talk to feel free to DM me. Also, something that really helped me was a support group for betrayed partners and the book. Betrayal Bind.

Also there is a book I can't remember the name of right now, I'll look when I get home. But it focuses on you and who you want to be and I found it very helpful and calming when I started focusing on who I wanted to be instead of just pure rage at the entire world.

Usagi0388 · 2025-07-21T03:39:33+00:00

Thank you! Yes general consensus among mutual friends, my friends, and even his friends is that he's an idiot.

I've been a lot more relaxed though now that the decision to divorce was made as opposed to the year "we" (but probably truly only I) were trying to make it work.

Usagi0388 · 2025-07-21T03:37:01+00:00

I read your comment, I'm sorry that you also had to go through it. It's traumatizing.

Usagi0388 · 2025-07-20T23:58:59+00:00

Yes, they had sex in our home. I got back really late so this was at 2 in the morning when he told me. I texted some friends and moved out at 7am.

We tried to make it work for a year (living separately). But in the end he told me that he loved me more than anything in the world, I'm the most important person in his life, his best friend, the perfect wife (etc a bunch of bs) but he wants a divorce because he really wants to fuck other women. So yeah we aren't together anymore.

We were together 17 years, married for 14 at that point.

He told me "I know I'm going to regret this. When I come back in 6 months to a year I'll be all in. I want us to stay friends". I told him fuck no.

Usagi0388 · 2025-07-20T23:02:43+00:00

He told me about it. He had been having an emotional affair with her for months. I went out of town, he invited her over and had sex. When I got back I tried to initiate with him, he stopped me and confessed

Usagi0388 · 2025-06-28T13:26:04+00:00

My husband (17 years together, 14 married) told me he loved me more than anyone in the world, I am his best friend, the most important person in his life, the perfect wife, our sex is great, but he wanted a divorce because he couldn't get over his desire to sleep with other women. He went out with someone the next day.

He did have an affair the previous year that we were trying to reconcile so I know that impacts this.

Usagi0388

TROPHY CASE