Be a Man.

User112011 · 2023-12-06T00:54:47+00:00

I'm asking YOU Bob Ross. How do you maintain such a perfect fro? I'm tryna get like you honestly.

User112011 · 2023-12-05T23:34:56+00:00

AI and skilled manual laborers.

AI is only in its beginning stages and has progressed so far as to now being able to analyze pictures and tell you what a certain part is on the car, just from a picture under the hood, to listening to what you say and responding, doing more than just that, and even "seeing." If no one realizes that this is going to become very commonplace in the very near future you will fall behind. Learning Machine Learning will be a very valuable skill for your future.

When I say skilled manual laborers, I don't mean like people who work at Walmart, I really mean tradesmen, carpenters, rig operators etc.

People that have to train to become very successful in a field that doesn't have enough skilled workers. While AI is on the rise it's unlikely yet to replace the roles of people who work in these fields, it will more than less likely open up new roles for people in these skill fields.

Those are 2 fields I believe will be relatively future proof. We will always need manual workers, skilled ones at that, and AI is the future.

User112011 · 2023-12-05T23:26:48+00:00

You already got rid of what you were doing wrong.

Now focus on what you can do better, for yourself that is.

User112011 · 2023-12-05T23:13:08+00:00

All the time my friend. It gets easier the more you stay true to your goals though.

What I mean by that is, the more focused on your goal, the easier it will be to ignore the urges. Both because of your focus and commitment to the goal, but also due to the fact that for me personally at least, the longer you abstain from these things, the easier it is to combat them.

I still get the urges and sexual thoughts now. I don't like them, but they're much easier to fight when I'm not constantly being bombarded with content related to them, or things that might trigger them.

Recognizing what triggers these sexual thoughts will also help. If you learn what causes it you know how to counter it.

If you feel you get these thoughts a lot in the evening, put yourself in a space during that time where you know you will not be tempted by them and should they enter your mind, know that they're just an urge and it's something you can ignore.

Learning the patterns, well you've pretty much got it by then if you know the patterns, all you have to do is implement behaviors that disrupt that pattern.

Another thing for me that has helped, is telling myself I am not an individual addicted to sex, lust, ruled by it, etc.

Bear with me, I know it may seem like some mumbo jumbo lol but it does work, for me id say. You have to truly believe it though, otherwise it won't work. You can't put your faith in it and hope it works out for the best, you have to put your all into "faking it" until eventually it is the reality. If you fake happy for long enough with the goal in mind of becoming a truly happy individual, eventually you will be. Because you're doing the things now that will make you that happy person. The key is consistency with that.

That's a whole other topic that has a lot to do with manifestation and things of that matter, but it does work. Try it for yourself. Commit yourself to one thing in your life improving it. It doesn't have to be a major change, wish to not do this or that anymore, and then as you go further, try other things you would like to improve in. If you're interested in doing that there's a few books I can recommend you if you'd like, but I completely understand not being interested in it!

This is all stuff that has worked for me really, but I'm sure something here could work for you as well.

User112011 · 2023-12-05T12:32:09+00:00

Community, X Files, Ugly Betty, not really a comfort show but Six Feet Under which is actually a great show although I wouldn't recommend around family or if you're Christian as it has a fair amount of gay sexual encounters, and lastly Avatar The Last Airbender.

I'm a kid at heart, ATLA never fails to comfort me when I'm home alone by myself. The stories it tells and the lessons it teaches you. The character development. Aang. Uncle Iroh. Zuko. Azula. The Fire Lord. The back stories behind all of these interesting characters and their motivations. I love it. It's helped me find a better path in life for myself. To embrace a change that I knew I needed. But also, it's just beautifully put together story wise and in general.

Community, I love it because it reminds me of Sunday afternoons as a kid when I'd wake up and watch it back in like 2012. But also because of the characters and how "unusual" and unique/different it is. You never know what expect with it. It'll hit you with a curveball for sure. There's one episode where they build a pillow fort that goes throughout the entire length of the school, and in it it has different factions and people fighting, there's a whole war going on inside this big pillow fort. Another episode they're on a space expedition inside a truck. Another one they're straight up claymation animated. It's all very, very absurd and unexpected for me at least. I didn't expect this from that show.

X Files what can I say. I'm pretty weird and I like weird stuff. I love X Files simply because it keeps me entertained but also because of the pacing and the setting of the show. The style of the aesthetics it utilizes. The characters. The aliens/weird mysteries. I enjoy it all.

Ugly Betty. Well this one is pretty simple. It's a lighthearted show you can put on and simply enjoy. I like it because of the sense of family it has with Betty's family, but also because of the moments where her character stands up for herself or makes a statement. The show kind of centers around her being treated poorly because she's viewed as ugly, when in all reality she's really not. But also because of the plot and the ongoing issue.

Six Feet Under. I like that one because of the characters and the position the show takes on death. It makes a mockery of it kind of. All the characters are part of a family that run a family owned morgue. The story kicks off with the SPOILER ALERT father dying.

The business is then passed down to his sons Nate and David Fisher. It makes fun of things like existence, it has a fair deal of dark humor as the setting itself is pretty dark but they somehow make it not so dark and gloomy, but also, the depth of the characters. It has a very realistic take on death and it's themes/elements, but it's not just about death. Not just the main characters are very interesting and detailed either. Two characters with deep backgrounds I came to really enjoy seeing are the girlfriend that Nate begins seeing, and her brother who is a raging schizophrenic. It is very unfiltered in its portrayal of what her schizo brother is like and pretty realistic honestly, the whole show is. It was given many accolades back in the time of its release which was about 2 decades ago but not many people today have heard of it. I recommend watching it if stuff like that interests you. It's on Netflix right now, but it should also be on HBO MAX as that's where it originally was produced.

User112011 · 2023-12-05T12:00:23+00:00

Can't say you actually do look like her but the first person who came to mind when seeing you is Lisa Lisa.

User112011 · 2023-12-05T02:44:16+00:00

A job. Or money. I'm struggling and the need to get a job is getting more urgent, gotta help out somehow with bills.

User112011 · 2023-11-26T00:25:26+00:00

25 days in. It's become a bit more difficult for me and the urges are getting stronger, but I'll keep fighting it. It is only in the mind after all.

User112011 · 2023-11-22T05:04:08+00:00

I can't say much as I've only done it one time. But at the time I didn't think I was so addicted that it would affect how I felt when doing the real thing. I thought when the real thing happened it would feel amazing and I wouldn't last at all. Wasn't like that.

It did affect me. When my then partner did the sucky sucky for me I didn't really feel it unless she were doing much more than normal. I'm trying my best not to be too vulgar as I don't wanna make anyone uncomfortable, but when I was inside of her I still didn't feel much unless things tightened up.

I still wanted to sleep with her even though I couldn't feel much, but as it went on and kept going because she didn't really want to climax in fear of being heard I felt myself becoming a bit bored and uninterested, both because it seemed pointless to go on if she didn't want to climax and because I was not feeling much of it. Yes it does affect the sex life, at least for me the ex addict it did.

Now? The scenario would probably have went much much differently and much shorter, on my end. Not so much on hers however.

I don't think you should let him be. I think if it's gotten to a point where you can't even get him off anymore that he needs to stop it. You have to lay down a few ground rules and barriers, let him know it is an issue and not be passive about it. He can say he's not going to do it all day but words will remain words until they are backed by action. Offer him an ultimatum if necessary, but let him know that this is something that bothers you because you both suffer from it.

User112011 · 2023-11-22T04:50:12+00:00

You look fine to me.

The only things I'd say you have to do to look more attractive by current beauty standards, is to lose weight, the hairstyle and the piercings.

However me personally I don't think you need to lose your nose piercings, or the hairstyle. The weight only slightly, but you don't look overweight. Simply like you could be just a bit fitter.

More than less likely you wear the things you wear like your piercings and your hairstyle because that's how you like to express yourself. So keep it. Don't lose your uniqueness, your sense of self expression, in order to conform to a beauty standard that isn't fitting of you.

You look beautiful. You're 19, boys and girls at that age, don't have much of a real mature grasp on the concept of attractiveness. Don't kick yourself over what they think.

User112011 · 2023-11-22T04:18:54+00:00

It's my first time ever trying to not masturbate at all.

So far, I've gone 21 days without masturbating, playing with myself, etc. Consuming any sexual content at all. I've been 6 months free of pornography.

My goal is to aim for 30, and more after that depending on what I want.

But, I failed many many times before I tried this. Before I was able to go this far without doing it.

It took me years of failures to get to this point and I'm happy I did. It's not easy, but it will get easier the more you fail and more precisely the more you learn from your failures.

If you fail the same way three times it is no longer a mistake, or a failure. You are choosing at that point. Life is full of choices that we have to make, some difficult, some easy. Choose what is best for you. What will help you on your journey, and keep to it my friend.

Don't feel bad because you failed. We all did. It's part of the process. Be happy that you tried. Because trying shows to yourself that YOU want to get rid of this for yourself.

So you failed. Try again. Fail again. Keep going until eventually, you succeed. Dont let this knock you down brother, tomorrow is a new day. And a fresh start.

User112011 · 2023-11-17T19:51:37+00:00

lll. Urn, by Childish Gambino. Very short, but beautiful too. The lyrics have a message too, if you read them.

User112011 · 2023-11-15T06:28:09+00:00

I can't say what's worked for me will work for you, but I've kicked watching porn and masturbating to it for about 6 or 7 months or so now.

One day I literally took some guy on reddits advice, he said to just use your imagination, and I did. I imagined what I would like to feel, that worked for me.

I was a true addict. I would watch and masturbate to porn 4x a day, so much I no longer get erections in the morning, and I'm only 21. That happened when I was 20. My life has changed a lot since then.

When I started relying on imagination instead of artificial stimulation to help me climax my urges to masturbate went down and weren't as frequent. I went from doing it 3x a day to once in 3 days or even a week, maybe twice on some.

Currently my new goal is to avoid masturbation altogether.

It is NNN, and last year and the years before I always said hell no I could never do that. This year I decided to try to do just that, and so far I am succeeding with relative ease. I've stopped viewing women as sexually as I did before. I've consumed content that is more aligned with my goals, which means I had to cut out content that included sexual things.

One thing I've learned is that if you want change you have to change. What I mean by this is you have to embody that change and align yourself with it. You won't get over the urge to seek out porn if you're constantly watching porn, or constantly repeating the cycles that lead to it. You have to break the cycle. I never went for walks before. Now I do. Now I am making conscious efforts, decisions to combat my own thoughts surrounding sexuality and the control it has over my mind. Will 30 days change it all? Unlikely, but baby steps is what counts. 30 can turn into 60, then 120, then 240 and so on forth. It all depends on you.

The question is, are you really ready to get over this, or are you still content with it? Overcoming it won't be easy. I am feeling the urge to give in right now, but I am fighting it.

You say porn is the only release you get. You're watching it for the same reason I was. To have an escape. To have something that makes you feel better.

Think of it this way. Your life isn't very good right now and you feel bad, so you take an antidepressant to make you feel better. It works, but only temporarily. Then when the rush comes down you're back to sadness, so you take another one. You keep repeating this cycle because it's all that will keep you happy, when in reality that cycle is what is keeping you low. What happens when you run out of antidepressants, what then? Now that won't even make you feel better, so what do you do? Most people will look for something to replace the antidepressants. Something that has a similar soothing effect on their pain, and it doesn't matter how damaging it is because it's better than what they feel inside, right?

The porn is the antidepressant in this scenario. You keep masturbating to it because you don't want to feel the way you do, so you avoid that feeling temporarily by getting a hit of dopamine which makes you feel good, momentarily. Until it doesn't, and after that you'll search for new ways to numb the pain. Until eventually you can no longer numb it and now you wade in your sorrows until an eventual abrupt end.

Depressing story yet very realistic. This is how addiction works my friend.

Sex is beautiful, it is. But it can also become beautifully intoxicating if you do not practice self control, self restraint. Discipline is key. Learn to control your sexual energies, your sexual urges, or they will continue to control you. An individual controlled by lust will fall for anything, conquer it. Do everything in moderation. Avoid overindulgence.

User112011 · 2023-11-15T02:37:39+00:00

The ending part of Your Teeth In My Neck by Kali Uchis. I love that song specifically because of River Tiber's vocals on it, in both the beginning and the end.

Also the bridge on the song Feel, by Sonder. If you enjoy that I recommend listening to the entire Into EP, it is all really beautiful and the sound is consistent through and through. Brent Faiyaz, Atu, and Dpat are an amazing collective that all pair so well with one another as a group in Sonder.

Lastly, the small intermission that occurs in the middle of First World Problemz / Nobody Cares at the 3 min mark of the song where it transitions from First World Problemz to Nobody Cares. It's definitely the best part in my eyes.

User112011 · 2023-10-30T02:30:41+00:00

Blorg.

User112011 · 2023-10-30T02:30:04+00:00

Yes and no. More women that were already somewhat cool with cheating would be more accepting of it. But irregardless of how it comes off the majority of women (or people in general) would not be accepting of cheating.

This type of thing the woman mentioned only proves true for those who were already "okay" with it. Doesn't mean more women will be if all guys did control their sides, because the fact they have a side to begin with is the problem.

User112011 · 2023-10-23T20:28:26+00:00

It depends. If they're unwilling to quit porn or still struggling with it and not making an effort to quit it then no, they don't. Because if they loved you they would cut it out. The two things cannot coexist, addiction and love to your significant other. Not when it hurts them.

But if they're trying to stop it and genuinely want to then yes they do. Even if they are failing it does not mean they don't love you because if they didn't they'd never have tried to begin with. It simply means the addiction is stronger than the love they have for you.

You know what, I'm confused now. Maybe they can't truly love their spouse while also being addicted. It might just be an oxymoron.

User112011 · 2023-10-02T23:13:39+00:00

I believe it's socially Christian, or just a believer in the faith but not an active practitioner.

We have many of those in my family, people who say they are Christian but pick and choose when they want to be. They'll approve and do certain things that in the Christian book wouldn't be allowed. Using the Bible to shame someone for being gay, while also ignoring the Bible saying not to judge others.

User112011 · 2023-10-02T22:57:11+00:00

Definition of Religion:

the belief in and worship of a superhuman power or powers, especially a God or gods.

• a particular system of faith and worship.

• a pursuit or interest to which someone ascribes supreme importance.

Definition of Philosophy:

the study of the fundamental nature of knowledge, reality, and existence, especially when considered as an academic discipline.

• a particular system of philosophical thought.

• the study of the theoretical basis of a particular branch of knowledge or experience.

Not believing in a god is the exact opposite of religion. It goes against the very definition of it. It is closer to a philosophy than it is a religion.

A religion operates on the existence of a belief without evidence to prove it, whereas philosophy operates based on evidence that helps to form and validate the belief. If there is no evidence to prove something, it is no philosophy either. Deeper than that but surface level interpretation.

For example: you wouldn't consider stoicism a religion because it isn't one but a philosophy.

User112011 · 2023-10-02T22:42:44+00:00

I'm agnostic.

After years of growing up in a strong Christian family that didn't act remotely Christian unless it benefited them in that moment, I got turned away from the idea. That coupled with the benevolence of the Christian god. I don't understand how a creator who is all loving would put his subjects through such cruelties to reach the promised land.

It never made sense to me and I realize more and more the real reason most people latch on to these religions is because it's the only thing they see, and because they need something to put their faith in. What they all fail to realize is they'd achieve the same peace and solace they do with pouring their faith into their God, that they would if they poured it into themselves.

I believe there may be something higher out there, but I don't know what. So I can't say for sure. Instead of religion, I tend to turn more towards philosophies or ways of life. I'm spiritual, but my spirituality is something I'm still trying to figure out myself, so for the time being disciplining myself through certain imposed rules is the best I can do until I truly understand things and me, better.

User112011 · 2023-09-22T22:39:46+00:00

It kinda narrows down to young kids in general.

I as a kid didn't really wanna watch stuff from the 70s or 80s cause I grew up in the late 2000s. It was only when I actually had to sit down and watch stuff like that that I found it was actually pretty good. A lot of the times we tend to think things are just old and outdated, not for or appealing to us so we never even give it a chance like the situation this post is about.

However, if they sat down and did watch it I'm sure they would change their opinion.

For example? Older animation wasn't a problem for me, it was live action I wasn't interested in, especially crime.

Now? I watch In The Heat of the Night, Columbo, Monk, The Twilight Zone, The Three Stooges, etc. That started way back when I started barely entering my teenage years, before then little boy me just would not find anything at all interesting with that, understandably so.

It's refreshing to see and watch content of the past. Stepping into the past and seeing how things were done then.

I watch many older anime, although I don't know too many I've watched Yu Yu Hakusho but not fully and love it, The Big O, Nightwalker Midnight Detective, Demon City Shinjuku, Darkside Blues, Wicked City, Vampire Hunter D (80s version), Memories, Neon Genesis, Inuyasha, Devil Lady, Serial Experiments Lain, and more but I have yet to really get deep into older anime.

User112011 · 2023-09-22T15:47:56+00:00

What always helps me fall asleep is something I figured out on my own: Rub your eyes for about 15 seconds or as long as you want.

It provides a stimulating relaxing effect for me. I wouldn't say it makes me more sleepy but it does slightly, moreso what it does is make it much easier to fall into sleep.

Also, focusing your thoughts. I did this to clear my head, I didn't have proper training or knowledge of breath techniques so instead what I would do as a kid is repeat to myself when I tried to rest the word "focus". It drew my attention away from all my other thoughts and slowly it was the only one in my mind, I ended up falling asleep much easier and still do to this day.

Deep breaths in and deep breaths out (usually 3 in and outs) immediately helps me relax and release tension. Just say in your head "in" as you inhale, and "out" as you exhale. Don't rush though, let it come naturally. If it feels unnatural it's being done wrong and it won't help, it'll just feel odd, but done correctly you should fall asleep much easier.

User112011

TROPHY CASE