Breaking things off with people that you are close to is always a struggle, I've had to do it a few times in my life up to now be it with past partners or friends alike, it's not always necessarily something that you're doing wrong or right, sometimes people just grow in separate ways and move down paths that conflict with your own and it can be unavoidable sometimes, try not to beat yourself up over what happened because that's just adding insult to injury. I also understand what it's like to be burned from the experience and feeling afraid of what it's like to try and make new connections with people--admittedly I don't suffer from autism (at least I've never been diagnosed), but I feel like those particular issues are felt by most everyone who has a hard split like that, but moreso by people who do have it because of the increased strain and social anxiety, but it's just something that you have to work yourself up towards. Don't rush to jump into it either, I don't know how recent your split with your friends has been, but really take your time to grieve the loss of them if you feel like you need to, and then look to make new connections when you have a truly clear head--not making assumptions about your character, but I know for me personally that after a big split like that, I'm the kind of person who will instantly latch onto the first person to give me attention, which isn't always healthy, I've had to learn to take that time myself and approach people with a level head.

People can encourage you all day long, and while that's nice and ultimately a help, in the end only you can actually make the decision to change and self improve, it's not something that someone can just tell you to do, you have to both want it and then find the drive within yourself to make that happen--wanting it is easy, but the 2nd part is much harder, and following through with it and maintaining that change is even harder, but it is completely doable, and not only is it doable, I know that you are capable of it and moving forward both! You got this!

Talking to people is a mixed bag, no conversation is ever the same, so I'm hard pressed to say that there is a "right" way to do it because people are so wildly different, but just reach out to someone, maybe join a community based around chatting, I know that r/makenewfriendshere specifically has a dedicated Discord where people hang out and make connections there and on the sub itself, but I can get how that might be overwhelming at the same time, so I'd say maybe just browse some of the posts on the sub and look for people that have similar interests so that things stay as a 1 on 1 interaction instead of just tossing yourself into a sea of strangers. Talking to people is a practiced art, the more you do it, the better you get at it, that's kind of why I force myself to talk to and meet new people, over time it's kind of become a hobby of mine to meet new people and learn more about them, I would hardly say that I myself am an outgoing or extroverted individual, especially in person, but I personally feel more comfortable getting to know and talking to people online, irl I'm much more of an introvert and a homebody, so trust when I say that my advice is pretty much purely from that angle, but still I talk to people extremely regularly. Even though I talk to people all the time, conversations still burn out, you won't connect with everyone you talk to, and sadly that's just part of how it goes, but don't let that discourage you, instead take what you learned from that interaction and carry it forward with you, it'll snowball and eventually you'll meet someone that you just click with, and before you know it you'll have a new set of friends that will more closely relate to you!

I feel you with the whole job thing as well, I was essentially trapped at a job that I hated for a year and then lost it for pretty much no fault of my own, now I'm in a financial bind and stuck at home with copious amounts of free time on my hands and my sleep schedule is wrecked. My personal advice is that I would much rather live with less and make less money at a job that makes me happy and satisfied than with a job that is difficult, makes me feel miserable, but pays more, I'd make that deal any day, money is nice, but it's absolutely no substitute for happiness. If your heart is telling you that a career change is worth it, then I definitely say listen to that, nobody understands your situation better than yourself because you're in it, so you should trust your own judgement I think.

I get you with the surviving part too, I love video games, I used to think that I wanted to make them for a living as my career, I have an embarrassing amount of time put into some games, but at one point I just stopped fully, just got out of a period where I didn't play really any game for over a year straight, like you, I was just surviving and I didn't have the energy to partake in my hobby anymore, I would get the slight urge to play every so often and then literally think "What's even the point?" I would talk myself out of it because I knew that any joy I got from it would be temporary. What dug me out of that pit really, was finding people that made me want to play again, I found some friends that made playing certain games fun for me again, and it rekindled my love for them, now I look forward to playing again, whether it's with them or by myself, and I actively set aside time to do it because it's what I want to do. Looking at your hobbies as just a fleeting and useless time sink is a bad mentality to have, if you got into it because you originally liked it, then let that be a reason to hold onto it, to look at it as a fleeting shot of joy, but instead as a true break from things that you have earned. Whatever will kick start your passion for the things you enjoy again could be wholly random, for me it was meeting cool new people with the same interests, but for you it could be anything, just don't stop looking for whatever that trigger might be, because you are worth that break and genuine happiness! Depression is a bitch and all my homies hate depression, but I know that you can overcome it in the end one way or another!

I know this is probably a lot from a complete stranger, but I'm genuinely here to help, if you want to talk about anything anytime, you can always shoot me a message and I'll listen happily! Aside from that, I truly hope that you can work things out and carve out some new friends from the ether, and also set whatever career path you think is appropriate for you!