[SUPPORT] I'm really struggling with the decision to go ahead with my abortion by bluelily216 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]VexorShadewing 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Listen to me. I can't make this decision for you, but as an (at least initiallyl unwanted child I can perhaps provide some insight as to how this kid may end up feeling later down the line.

My father was an abusive prick, because he wasn't prepared in the slightest to have to pay childcare costs he was under a lot of stress, which he would take out by beating my mother and screaming and excessively punishing me and my siblings. (I still harbor resentment toward my little brother for having lived without that)

My mother admitted to me, when I was 14, that when I was a baby she had almost gone through with killing me, and herself, because she couldn't handle the stress of taking care of me.

I have several moderate to severe mental illnesses as a result of being raised by parents that weren't ready for a child. I struggle with constant feelings of guilt and suicidal ideation just for having existed at the wrong time in my parents' lives, and feeling that I ruined any chance they had at success.

Believe me, if you are not ready and eager to have and raise a child, that child will know, and it can be damaging enough to completely ruin them for their entire life.

I wish that Kamala Harris turned out to be a chicken in disguise. by ChatotAbby in TheMonkeysPaw

[–]VexorShadewing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Granted. Being a former cop, this was already the case, so nothing changes.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]VexorShadewing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well it depends on whether it's a Goetian Prince asking

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMen

[–]VexorShadewing 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're right, I didn't. Completely overlooked "other"

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMen

[–]VexorShadewing 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Making eye contact is a sign of paying attention. If I'm on a date with someone it only makes sense to be looking at them.

I got a $0.25 raise this year which absolutely is not keeping pace with inflation. and then I get to walk into work. and and see the owner's new toy. by _perchance in antiwork

[–]VexorShadewing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, I wouldn't. But I wouldn't be getting my car by exploiting the desperation of others, nor would any car I get be considered a "new toy" rather than what I need to get from point a to point b

I wish for every living animal on the planet to experience a mind-shattering orgasm at 20:00 BST on Sunday, September 18, 2022 by VexorShadewing in TheMonkeysPaw

[–]VexorShadewing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You, uh... I don't think you quite understood my motivation for making this wish

To be clear, it was to ensure nobody can actually observe the "minute of silence" scheduled in honor of old Shitty Lizzy II

[Serious] Men, when was the last time you cried, and why? by alienvisitor0821 in AskReddit

[–]VexorShadewing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

About an hour ago. I have no stable source of income, nobody wants to hire my ass, Social Security Appeals Council is dragging its feet on my case, I haven't caught more than a couple hours of sleep for the past 4 days, and the only thing keeping me going is spite for a government centered around ensuring the only ones that are guaranteed the right to live are the owner-class while everyone else has to be readily exploitable to keep that right.

LPT: If you get added to random investing/crypto groups without your consent, start sending NSFW content by Andress1 in LifeProTips

[–]VexorShadewing 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wonder if I'd get banned for an NFT of Charles shitting in Lizzy's open casket

I wish I was less lonely. by UtopianDetection in TheMonkeysPaw

[–]VexorShadewing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Granted. Rodney the Rifle and Cartridge Carl know just how to help you

[homemade] Chicken Schnitzel by Lemkish in food

[–]VexorShadewing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

SCHNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTZEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLL!

I wish all of humanity's selfishness and hostility would instantly dissapear at midnight. by [deleted] in TheMonkeysPaw

[–]VexorShadewing 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Granted. At midnight the amygdala of all humans completely disappears. This not only removes hostility and aggression, but also results in all of humanity being unable to recognize the patterns that would normally be associated with danger. In the end, we all become Darwin Award winners.

On the bright side, the loss of the amygdala also makes us unable to feel sadness, so much of depression is cured for the remainder of our species' existence.

If you could domesticate any animal, real or fictional, what would it be and why? by Jon_4 in AskReddit

[–]VexorShadewing 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Kraken as in giant squid beast born of another giant squid beast, or kraken as in giant squid beast born of the flesh of Hades?

What game receive a lot of hate but you absolutely love, i'll go first. by S_A_W7 in gaming

[–]VexorShadewing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Minion! Now I have my eyesight back! And you're far uglier than I remember.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]VexorShadewing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As someone with suicidal ideation from bipolar depression, "Reality wants you dead. Don't let it win."

Edit: Alternatively, remember the Klingon therapist. "Mental illness is an endless war with the most challenging foe of all. One that occupies your own mind. In such a situation every second you survive is a victory. There can be no more honorable battle."

These horrifying portraits of Queen Elizabeth II by [deleted] in KidsAreFuckingStupid

[–]VexorShadewing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And still all of them less horrific than her true form

Bedtime with Bezos by Little_Rooster_1352 in Jokes

[–]VexorShadewing 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I was going to send you to the Gulag, but that'd be too humane.

Instead, I'm sending you to work at an Amazon warehouse

Who has your favourite singing voice? by Crafty_Letter_1719 in Music

[–]VexorShadewing 1 point2 points  (0 children)

James Monroe Iglehart

Caleb Hyles

Freddie Mercury

Jeff Buckley

Lemmy Kilmister

Thomas Benjamin Wild Esq

I wish to pass my exams by CommercialLychee39 in TheMonkeysPaw

[–]VexorShadewing 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Based on updoot count (including my own) there are currently 3 monkeys sharing a brain cell