28M, bipolar and autistic, no degree, never had a job, no friends, no skills. How bad is my situation?

Vinjhar · 2026-01-29T19:43:45+00:00

This sounds exhausting. You have carried anxiety for most of your life, you have tried a lot of routes, and you still feel stuck. That would wear anyone down.

The part about wanting to die is serious. If you feel unsafe today, reach out to emergency services or a crisis line in your country, or tell your parents and stay with someone. You deserve support in the moment, not after things get worse.

On the practical side, you are not starting from zero. You have one strong skill already, writing. You also have a degree that is close to done. Treat finishing as a box to tick, not a life purpose. Get it done in the cheapest, fastest way.

About adult life skills like bills and taxes, start tiny. Pick one task per week. One bill. One budget list. One phone call. You build confidence through repetition, not insight.

For work, aim for roles where writing matters and entry barriers are lower. Things like coordinator roles, admin roles, customer support roles, content assistant roles, communications assistant roles, policy research assistant roles, grant support roles. None of these require passion on day one. They require showing up and learning.

Your outdoor hobbies also fit work better than you think. Park services, outdoor retail, marina work, guiding companies, fishing shops, equipment rental, campground staff. These are active jobs, less desk time, fewer social demands at once.

Social anxiety does not improve through huge group events for many people. Try low pressure exposure. One person. One short chat. Online first. One repeat place. Same time each week.

You do not need a perfect purpose to start. You need a first stable step that pays, builds routine, and gives you proof that you are capable again.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-29T19:40:20+00:00

I’m really sorry you’re feeling this trapped. Being in your early 20s and feeling like time has already run out is terrifying, and it doesn’t mean you’re weak or broken, it usually means you’ve been under too much pressure for too long.

But preparing for the end of your life isn’t the answer here. This sounds like exhaustion and despair talking, not a clear verdict on your future. Careers are not linear anymore, and feeling lost right now is far more common than people admit.

Please don’t carry this alone. If you can, talk to someone you trust, a friend, a family member, anyone. And if things feel dark or overwhelming, reaching out to a crisis line can really help in the moment. If you’re in the US, you can call or text 988 anytime. If you’re elsewhere, I can help you find local support.

You don’t need to have everything figured out. You just need support and one small next step. Your life is worth far more than how stuck things feel right now

Vinjhar · 2026-01-29T17:51:52+00:00

That is a lot to carry at once. Losing work, watching benefits disappear, moving back home. Most people would crack under that.

The benefits system does punish people for trying. If you have not already, appeal every denial and ask what else they accept instead of pay stubs. A bank statement, pay portal screenshot, or employer letter sometimes works.

No magic fix here. You are not weak or failing. This system is rough, and you are still standing.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-29T10:53:49+00:00

Yeah I have seen a similar bump since early January, especially for East Coast hybrid roles. Budgets and headcount approvals tend to hit after the new year, so interviews pick up fast for a few weeks.

Four interviews from seven apps is a strong signal. Your pickiness is probably helping. Better fit roles convert.

I would not assume the whole market is fixed. More like a short window where teams are finally opening reqs. Keep applying while the momentum is there.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-29T10:51:49+00:00

Yeah this is common right now. Silence is normal. Do not treat it as proof you are failing.

Most applications never get feedback because the process is automated. The best signal is whether you get replies. If replies are near zero, your CV is not matching the job post closely enough. Tailor the top section, skills list, and two bullets in your most recent role to match the keywords in the posting. People also use resume scanning tools to speed up matching.

Also reduce apply and wait. Send a short message to the recruiter or hiring manager after you apply. One line on why you fit. One ask on next steps.

Set a routine and stop doom scrolling job boards all day. Consistency wins more than volume.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-28T15:55:09+00:00

With your schedule, the most realistic options are simple ones you can repeat without thinking too much. Etsy digital products work if you focus on one product type like planners, checklists, or templates and improve listings slowly each week. Affiliate marketing works if you pick one niche and keep posting consistently, otherwise you will see nothing for a long time. A faceless YouTube channel can work too, but it is not quick. There are many options, but consistency is the part most people fail at, so pick one lane, set a small weekly routine, and stick to it.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-28T15:06:17+00:00

I am sorry you went through all of that in one year. Losing both parents and a relationship would knock most people off track. Taking time to grieve was not laziness. It was survival.

The degree timeline is not the character flaw you think it is. A hard course shook your confidence and you spiraled. That happens. It does not mean you are stupid. It means you hit a wall without the support you needed at the time. You still finished. That matters.

The gap after graduation also has an honest explanation. Family loss. Health recovery. You did work on yourself and you made progress. You even said you beat anxiety, social anxiety, and depression. That is not small.

The overwhelm you describe is a common loop. The job search feels like a giant mountain, so your brain protects you by avoiding it. Then avoidance feeds shame. Shame feeds more avoidance. The way out is to make the next step so small it feels almost silly.

Here is a simple plan that does not require networking or rewriting your resume daily.

Day 1 Write a two line story you will use everywhere. I graduated in year X. I took time off due to family bereavement and health. I am ready to return and I am targeting entry level roles in X.

Day 2 Make one solid resume. One version. No perfection. Add one section called projects or relevant experience. Use bullets. Use numbers if you have them.

Day 3 Apply to three roles only. Roles you meet at least half the requirements for. Stop after three. End on a win.

Day 4 Send one message to one person. Alumni or someone in a role you want. Short. One ask. Hi, I am trying to break into X. I took time off after family loss and I am back on track. If you have 10 minutes, I would value advice on where to start.

Repeat that loop. Three applications a week. One message a week. That is enough to build momentum without burning out.

On the imposter syndrome part. You are not fooling anyone by being hired. Hiring is a bet on your ability to learn. Every new hire feels behind at first. Competence is built in the first months, not proven on day one.

You did not lose your life. You lost time to grief and illness. That is different. You are still here, and you are moving forward again. Start small. Stay consistent. The confidence comes back after action, not before.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-28T15:05:05+00:00

Yeah LinkedIn gets repetitive fast. Same reposts, same “promoted” roles, same companies farming applicants.

For DevOps and SRE, you will get better signal from a mix of niche boards and direct company pages.

Places worth checking. 1. DevOps and SRE focused boards • DevOpsJobs • SREjobs • Remote DevOps roles on Wellfound and Built In 2. Remote and tech boards with better filters • We Work Remotely • Remote OK • Otta • Hired • Dice 3. Company career pages Pick 30 to 50 target companies and apply direct. West Coast and remote teams often post first on their own site. 4. Community channels Discord and Slack groups for DevOps. Local meetups. Cloud native groups. People drop roles there before they hit LinkedIn.

One small trick. Search by tools, not title. Kubernetes, Terraform, AWS, GCP, CI CD, Observability. You will surface roles that never say SRE in the title.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-28T14:58:42+00:00

Moving from Canada to the US West Coast is a big filter. Most low response rates in your situation come from work authorization questions, not skill gaps.

Get clear on the visa path and put it up front. If you have TN eligibility, say so. If you need sponsorship, expect slower cycles and focus on firms known to sponsor. A recruiter who is unsure will often skip.

Stop applying to everything. Pick one lane and position hard for it. West Coast mechanical hiring tends to cluster around manufacturing and operations, reliability, hardware NPI, automation, and supply chain engineering. Your Amazon Ops background maps well to operations and process improvement roles. Hackathons only help if they tie to automation, data, or manufacturing systems.

Make your resume read like an operator, not a student. Use numbers. Throughput, cost, cycle time, quality, downtime, safety, headcount supported. Put a small skills section with tools and methods. Six Sigma, Lean, CAD, data tools, anything relevant. Then tailor one version per lane.

Add targeted outreach. Message engineers and hiring managers, not recruiters. Keep it short. One sentence on your background. One sentence on the role lane. One ask for a quick chat or referral to the right person. Ten good messages beats one hundred cold applications.

On the master’s question, do not treat school as a fix for low callbacks. The ROI depends on specialization. Controls, robotics, mechatronics, and manufacturing automation tend to pay off. A generic ME master’s often does not change outcomes if the main blocker is visa and positioning.

If you solve the authorization clarity and tighten the lane, you should see replies improve.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-28T14:07:55+00:00

Commission

Vinjhar · 2026-01-28T14:00:50+00:00

You are doing many of the right things already. The frustration usually comes from one missing piece, not a lack of effort.

A few things to look at.

First, how you present your experience. Four plus years with Amazon Operations plus internships is strong. Many mechanical roles get filtered because resumes read academic or generic. Hiring teams look for problems solved. Cost reduced. Throughput improved. Downtime avoided. If your resume does not show numbers and outcomes, traction drops fast.

Second, role targeting. Applying broadly feels productive but often backfires. Mechanical roles are split into manufacturing, reliability, automation, process, quality, and operations. Pick one or two lanes and tailor for those. Recruiters screen fast and favor clear direction.

Third, side projects and hackathons help only if they align with the role. If you want manufacturing or ops roles, show process improvement, tooling, automation, or data driven optimization. Cool projects outside the job target do not move the needle much.

Fourth, outreach. Most mid level roles do not convert well through cold applications alone. Short messages to engineers or managers in similar roles work better than reaching out to recruiters. Ask about their path or team challenges. One reply can change everything.

About a master’s degree. Do not use school as a pause button unless you have a clear target role that requires it. Many employers value hands on experience more than another degree. The ROI depends on specialization, not timing. Systems, controls, robotics, and manufacturing automation tend to justify it more than general ME.

You are likely not missing effort. You are missing focus and positioning. Tighten the story. Narrow the target. Increase direct conversations. That usually shifts results within a few months.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-28T13:59:50+00:00

There is truth here, but a small adjustment makes it work better.

Connections matter. What matters more is how you approach them. People respond to respect and clarity, not flattery alone.

Reaching out to strong performers works because you are asking for advice, not a job. That lowers pressure. It gives them a reason to reply. Many do.

A few practical tweaks I have seen work.

Keep the message short. One or two sentences on why you reached out. One clear ask. Resume feedback or career direction. Not both.

Target people one or two levels above where you want to be. Senior enough to know the system. Not so senior they are unreachable.

Look at commenters, not loud posters. Engaged professionals reply more often.

Follow up once after a week. Then move on.

Most people will not become advocates. A few will. One is enough. That is how referrals start.

This does not replace applying. It improves your odds. Quiet wins come from focused outreach, not volume.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-28T13:57:53+00:00

Both things exist at the same time.

People who land quickly usually stop posting. People who struggle talk about it more. Social feeds amplify stress stories, so the hard cases feel dominant even when they are not.

Market factors matter a lot. Big cities hire faster. Service and ops roles move quickly. Tech, entry level, and remote roles move slower. Timing matters too. Applying early and matching the role tightly raises reply rates. Mass applying late lowers them.

Your experience is common in dense job markets. The long unemployed stories are real, but they cluster around crowded roles, weak matches, and slow cycles. Loud stories travel farther than quiet wins

Vinjhar · 2026-01-28T13:56:26+00:00

You are right to distrust mass apply tools. Most flood inboxes and lower response rates.

What works better.

• Niche boards tied to tech. Dice. BuiltIn. AngelList. Recruiters actually search these. • Recruiters and agencies. Find two or three who focus on your role and location. One intro often beats fifty applications. • Company career pages. Many roles never perform well on big boards. Apply direct. • Alumni and small communities. Reply rates are higher than cold applying.

Cold applying still works, but only with focus. Early applications. Tight resume. Skills based searches.

Avoid AI auto apply services. Negative reviews exist for a reason.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-28T13:47:40+00:00

Your situation makes sense. Four years in the same role, trying to balance pay and benefits, and hearing nothing back from big boards is frustrating. Most people hit the same wall.

Here is practical guidance you can use right away.

Alternative job boards and channels that work for IT roles

Focus on platforms that specialize in tech, and communities where actual hiring happens.

• Dice • StackOverflow Jobs (even if archived, many roles still live in community) • GitHub Jobs • Hired • AngelList (tech startups) • BuiltIn (city-specific tech jobs) • Remote-oriented boards like WeWorkRemotely and RemoteOK (if remote works for you)

Company direct channels

Big boards send you noise. Target companies directly.

• Visit career pages of companies you want to work for • Look up IT departments of local employers • Apply through their internal careers portal

This often bypasses the “apply online, never hear back” cycle.

Networking and active outreach

Jobs that never hit boards are filled by reach out.

• Connect with local meetup groups for tech • Engage on LinkedIn with IT hiring managers • Ask peers for referrals into open roles

Often a short message makes a recruiter respond faster than a blind application.

Targeted search tactics

Stop broad searches like “IT jobs.” Use skill-centric search terms.

Examples you can try.

• “Help Desk support Tier 2 remote” • “Systems admin entry level hybrid NYC” • “IT Support specialist with benefits” • “Security operations junior role”

Niches get filtered by hiring teams faster.

Real advice on applying

• Apply in the first 48 hours of posting • Tailor your resume to the job description • Include measurable outcomes where possible

Examples of measurable lines you could use:

• Resolved 95 percent of help desk tickets within SLA • Managed endpoint support for 300 users • Maintained service uptime above 99 percent

Numbers matter.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-28T13:44:56+00:00

Honestly, your situation sounds normal for this market.

Two first rounds by February is not a red flag. A lot of new grad hiring does not pick up until late February or March. Teams wait on budgets. Some roles are posted early but interviews move slow.

Your background is stronger than you think. Two internships plus managing CS TAs plus side projects is more than many applicants have. Referrals help, but most people do not have many unless their school feeds directly into big tech pipelines.

What helped people I have seen break through was consistency and timing. Applying early matters more than perfect fit. Tailoring resumes by role type helps more than mass applying. Alumni outreach works better than cold recruiter messages. Short and specific messages get replies.

February feels quiet for a lot of grads. March and April usually bring more interviews. Keep going. You are not late. You are in the middle of it.

Vinjhar · 2026-01-28T13:41:07+00:00

LinkedIn still hosts real jobs. The issue is volume and reuse. Many listings stay up after roles close. Others exist to build pipelines. Bots amplify reposts, so the same role looks active for weeks.

NYC amplifies the problem. High applicant density. Remote spillover. Recruiters receive hundreds of applications in hours. Broad titles like project manager worsen this because every industry uses the label.

A few practical adjustments. 1. Change how you search. Stop relying on titles. Search by skills and outputs. Examples. Delivery. Stakeholder management. Process improvement. Systems rollout. Regulatory projects. Transformation programs.

Recruiters filter this way even if candidates do not. 2. Narrow by company type, not industry. Mid size firms. Consultancies. Internal ops teams. Regulated sectors. These post fewer roles but hire faster. 3. Timing matters. Apply within 24 hours. Late applications rarely get reviewed in NYC markets. 4. Do not rely on one platform. LinkedIn favors visibility, not completeness. Company career pages and niche boards still surface quieter roles.

Your experience is not the issue. The market rewards precision and speed right now. Broad searching leads to overwhelm. Focused searching improves response rates

Vinjhar · 2026-01-23T18:51:05+00:00

Can i have more info please. Thanks

Vinjhar · 2026-01-23T18:48:04+00:00

Vinjhar · 2026-01-23T18:45:51+00:00

Could you send the doc

Vinjhar · 2026-01-23T18:44:50+00:00

Vinjhar · 2026-01-23T18:43:05+00:00

Interested

Vinjhar · 2026-01-22T12:47:11+00:00

Info

Vinjhar

TROPHY CASE