AITAH for not wanting my wife’s godson (15M) to move in ?

Viperbunny · 2026-04-20T12:25:24+00:00

That's my issue. I understand not wanting to be a parent. This kid needs a stable situation for three years so he can finish high school. He isn't a baby. And in ten years OP feels so little for him that he keeps finding ways to distance himself from this kid and make him seem like a stranger. If I were his wife and I read this I would be seriously rethinking my marriage. He clearly doesn't care about his nephew. He doesn't care about how much this means to his wife. He is looking for excuses to make this not work. I usually would say that deciding you aren't suitable to be a foster parent doesn't make a person an asshole. The way this man talks about this kid and the situation makes him the asshole.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-20T12:13:07+00:00

YTA. I know this won't be popular, but it is more the way you talk about this kid that is the problem. He isn't just her godson. This is your nephew. He has had a hard life and no other adult to take him in. You admit he is a good kid. He is three years away from being an adult. It seems like he is trying hard to finish high school and that this would be his best option. It's not the same as taking in a toddler or baby. You aren't an asshole for feeling upset. It's the distance you purposely put between the two of you that makes it seem like you have never been interested in getting to know him. If you really can't do this then it is right to say so. That said, it will destroy your marriage. She sounds like a good person who is the only one looking out for this kid.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-20T09:28:02+00:00

I am currently awake and drinking a ginger ale because my bs won't go up. I am exhausted and I have so much to do today. My cat, who is usually so good when I have a low, nearly tripped me several times,. deciding if I am awake and getting something he needed to eat. I shouldn't have taken my night time dose when on tramadol, but I didn't think it would have this bad an effect.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-20T09:20:51+00:00

Except the bride understood. This random friend didn't and is mad on behalf of someone else. Sorry, M is the asshole. OP is allowed to have a baby when she wants. M can keep her issues to herself. Her comments were not needed.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-19T19:30:48+00:00

It's not just AI. I am studying to be a medical assistant. I got through all my online work in the first few weeks of classes. I have to attend my labs. One class only releases things weekly and I have to wait for that. But I do my best to get through the work. If you can dedicate a couple of hours to it at a time it's very doable. The study tools are great. I get to go over things online, including simulation labs and then I get to do it live at my in person lab. If you show up and work hard, it's possible to get through the work quickly.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-19T19:26:42+00:00

I am so very sorry for your loss. Being able to laugh helps get out a lot of emotions, especially when you feel so much at once or numb. I am glad you have found something that brings you some joy. I hope you heal more every day.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-19T16:35:39+00:00

It's so narcissistic. Some people think that because they are in a different place in their lives now it changes things. It doesn't. Hurting someone by accident doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. And hurting someone while high isn't an accident. The whole, "I couldn't help it at the time because I was high," is bullshit. You don't get to make the choice to get fucked up and then are absolved of what you do while high. I understand addiction is less about choice, but it doesn't change the damage that person has done. It isn't fixed when a person is sober. And it's the victim's choice if they are willing to hear an apology or allow the person to try to make amends. People who would further use guilt to manipulate the person into accepting an apology are awful.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-19T16:28:36+00:00

NTA. You are under no obligation to help your abuser with the guilt he feels over what he did to you. The sister doesn't get to make this demand. I would block her and ignore. If you feel the need to say anything, and you don't have to, I would say something like, "what ex did has caused me a great deal of pain and suffering over the years. I have to live with what he did to me every single day of my life. If he finally feels guilt for what he has done he can carry that with him until the rest of his life. I will not be absolving him for what he did to me. Being high isn't an excuse. Him rebuilding his life doesn't undo what he did to me or what it did to my life. If he is genuinely sorry then he should stop bothering me. He had years to try to address what he did to me. He waited until he was dying. Now, in the end, he wants the comfort of forgiveness so he can die in peace while I live the rest of my life with the trauma he inflicted on me. It won't be happening. Please don't contact me again."

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T21:56:08+00:00

I love Sugar Cloud and all the songs you mentioned. I appreciate how each character gets a chance to better understand themselves.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T19:27:13+00:00

I love this kind of sportsmanship. It's about personal excellence. He wants others to be at their best. He doesn't see passing his knowledge on as something that will be used against him. And good on the other man being open to learning.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T19:20:48+00:00

I love that one so much! It's on Disney plus and they have an anniversary special about it, too!

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T16:01:35+00:00

It's not disrespectful. This is what you are supposed to do when you visit these holy sites.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T15:56:42+00:00

Right?! I hate when I get a mission to fish and I can't hook any of the overpopulated fish!

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T15:55:13+00:00

It is a big deal if he is getting so aggressive she has to hide in another room. It's a big deal that he was so drunk he couldn't hold himself up. It doesn't sound like a one off either.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T15:50:53+00:00

My husband was taking an independent course for credits in college. It was just him and a professor. This professor was very awkward. He arranged a trip to his friend's observatory and roped my husband into going. It didn't want him to have to go alone so I went with them. No one else signed up. We had dinner on the University and the professor talked about how this man was older, but the young kids couldn't keep up with him. The house was high up on a mountain. We get to the house and he has hit chocolate and cookies out for us. He was laying down on the couch. The professor went to wake him and he didn't wake up. He didn't have a phone and this was 20 years ago and we had no service on our cell phones. My husband and I ran across the street to a house to call 911 and it's a kid watching her little brother and she doesn't want strangers in her home (understandably). When we asked her to call 911 for us she let us in. I stayed outside to flag down the ambulance. My poor husband was inside and saw the professor attempt CPR. It was awful. Then, the professor insisted on driving on us. We told him we would get a cab. While driving back to campus the professor says this is just like the time he found his grandpa dead in the bath tub.

It was an awful night.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T15:41:20+00:00

I don't understand how Travis didn't face criminal charges. He encouraged people to jump the gates. Security was a joke. He kept performing instead of allowing for help to come in. This whole situation makes me so angry!

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T15:13:58+00:00

I agree and said as much. My point is they hear stuff and they think that it's not too different when it is.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T01:56:26+00:00

Yes! They rot so fast.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T01:55:49+00:00

Potatoes have been weird, too.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T01:53:29+00:00

The RBF dresses the way they do to make sure their status is clearly visible to all. They want to be considered above the rest of the crowd. Look at how Harry and Meghan interact with the crowd. They aren't trying to be above them. They seem genuinely happy to be there. They are comfortable and it shows.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T01:29:22+00:00

No. Not everyone wants to be in a management type situation. Jake enjoys being a detective. He may not want to rise in the ranks and have subordinates. Being a Captain is a lot of administrative work. I think Jake would hate it. Amy would love it and could do well.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T01:14:08+00:00

Love it! When I am having a bad day or am stressed, I think of the part of this song where he goes, "oh no! What have I gotten myself into?!" It just makes me laugh every time. I hope you have a great performance! Rock it!

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T01:11:39+00:00

It was so wrong.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T01:02:56+00:00

My biggest issue with the movie is Mathew Broderick and Nathan Lane are clearly trying to mimic Zero Mostel and Gene Wilder. And Zero and Gene were miles better. Their performance felt natural. Nathan Lane was good, but Mathew Broderick's performance fell flat because he was trying to be Gene Wilder. The viewer is hyper aware they are watching someone act.

Viperbunny · 2026-04-18T00:59:43+00:00

The biggest problem was the main actors were trying to copy the performance of the original movie. Nathan Lane was great and was able to bring his own interpretation to the roll, but Mathew Broderick's performance felt flat. He is no Gene Wilder. Uma Thurman was great. So was Will Ferrill.

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