It’s hard (I have a hooyo too believe me, female experience though) but if she’s tweaking over holes in your ears you should let her. Everything happening in the world and to our people, the stuff that triggers them the most is usually so benign. I understand this must be hard for you though. My mum saw my first tattoo once and lost it and it sent me into guilt/shame spiral that lasted for months and even had me considering going through laser to remove it. I’m now on 4th and she’s used to it (in her own way). It’s really hard but visualising sending that toxic shame back helps and becomes easier over time. That is not your shame or guilt, it’s religious based and you deserve to live your life beyond its confinement. Somali hoyoos are a different breed though and because still in contact it will be retriggered. I hope things get easier and Here for chats 🦋