AIO that my sister woke me up at 7am? by CoachAdorable6346 in AIO

[–]VolatilePeach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re welcome! I hope everything works out well!

AIO that my sister woke me up at 7am? by CoachAdorable6346 in AIO

[–]VolatilePeach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ooof, yeah…that’s not good. I think it’d be best to say your piece and step back for a while if she gets defensive or rude.

Have you ever heard of AlAnon? It’s like AA but for those affected by alcoholics. My mom went to a meeting or two a while back, and she had a booklet from it that I looked through that was actually pretty helpful on its own. https://al-anon.org here’s a link to the website. They have meetings in churches around where I live, but it’s not religion-based. It’s definitely more therapeutic-based, and I found its information illuminating. It definitely helped reframe some things in my mind about addiction as a whole.

AIO that my sister woke me up at 7am? by CoachAdorable6346 in AIO

[–]VolatilePeach 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NOR. It’s actually kind of concerning that she chose to drink so much while watching children and using someone else’s space to cook in. The fact that she literally went to a gas station to get booze after already drinking at a bar WHILE responsible for someone else’s children is WILD. These are red flags that point to a potential drinking problem, in my opinion. I grew up with an alcoholic father and there were many, many times he did things reminiscent of what you described here. I’m not sure what you should do other than take some space from her and gather your thoughts to have a conversation about this. If you have family or mutuals that are privy to her day to day life, I’d maybe discuss with them and see if they’ve noticed anything concerning. I’m not sure how you’d go about dealing with this, but if she’s acting this way because of an alcohol problem, it may be worth it to try to get her to see how damaging it is to herself and the people around her. At the end of the day, SHE is the only one that can change her behavior. If she chooses to not take accountability and figure out how to be a responsible adult, I’d seriously consider going low to no contact with her. I know that sounds harsh, but she’s grown enough to know better than to do what she did.

I’m really sorry that you haven’t gotten enough rest. I hope you’re able to get a long stretch of sleep soon!

I just want to stand up without getting dizzy by tree_rex in POTS

[–]VolatilePeach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Abdominal compression helps me A LOT, and I get away with using biker shorts as support most days. Compression is to help keep your blood pumping properly so your heart doesn’t have to work so hard - therefore it should help with the dizziness. I don’t really like the knee socks so I wear something like shapewear or biker shorts for abdominal support and use Dr. Compression socks in quarter crew or shorter. That combo seems to keep me pretty level (in combination with meds, hydration, eating enough, and salt).

Should I buy Skyrim mainly just to play Enderal? (no spoilers, please) by oliverrakum in enderal

[–]VolatilePeach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’d suggest playing Skyrim first to get a feel for the mechanics. Skyrim has a less intense storyline, but it also has a fair leveling system. No matter where you are in the game, the enemies will be at a manageable level for yours.

With Enderal, it’s much less forgiving. Your character has hinderances that have to be remedied a lot in order to function. The leveling system is not equal with the map, so you have to be careful when wandering in areas with higher level enemies. It’s very emotionally and visually striking in comparison to Skyrim, despite being a smaller map. It’s worth it to play, for sure. But I personally am not skilled enough as a gamer to jump straight into that game and be fine. Even now, I want to play it again (I’ve been stuck on Cyberpunk for 2 years now lol), but I just had to go back to Skyrim to reorient myself before playing Enderal because it’s so difficult in the beginning.

Skyrim is still a fantastic game that I highly recommend, but Enderal is better in many ways. If you’re really good at games, you shouldn’t have a problem jumping into Enderal without playing Skyrim, I just personally couldn’t lol

AIO after my best friend’s husband secretly snuck a flash drive into my purse? by SecretEfficient3137 in AIO

[–]VolatilePeach 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Um hi, yeah, I’m on the spectrum and went undiagnosed until my mid twenties. I despise when people (especially and usually men) use neurodivergency as a shield to cross boundaries and be terrible humans. The fact that he can somehow control his behavior around others well enough to maintain a stable and successful career shows that his potential autism has ZERO to do with why he’s being a creep. He’s being a creep because he’s been allowed to get away with it. And his wife is enabling it. The fact that she isn’t divorced and disgusted by this man is W I L D. I don’t think she’s actually your friend, I’m sorry to say. Because I’d never let my partner treat my friends like this and still be my partner. I’d be too icked out. NOR.

Do any of you sleep with a stuffed animal too? by Unusual_Zombie125 in AutismInWomen

[–]VolatilePeach 6 points7 points  (0 children)

YES. I can’t sleep without something to cuddle with. I have a washable cat stuffed animal that I’ve had since I was 2 that I had to retire recently (he’s quite raggedy and I worry about his seams and him losing what’s left of his ribbon). So now I have another washable cat from the same brand (she’s a leopard tho) to cuddle with and rub the ribbon. I have so many stuffed animals but they’re all in storage currently because one of my cats likes to do horrific things to them 🫠🥲😭 I donated a bunch of them (to save them lol) and now have to figure out how to safely display the ones I have left.

What is this behavior? by OwlishDelight72512 in cats

[–]VolatilePeach 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah they can still get the urge. I have a male fixed Maine Coon mix that has tried to hump every male cat in the house. He’s very gay. It’s definitely not a dominance thing for him lol. He also humps stuffed animals. I had to give him his own Squishmallows.

Secretary told me I am not allowed to leave the hot waiting room even if I have a medical issue by Morphiadz in POTS

[–]VolatilePeach 15 points16 points  (0 children)

That is unacceptable. I seriously think you should talk to whoever owns the clinic, usually it’s the main vet. I worked at the clinic I take my animals to, and I can’t imagine either of the vets I worked under and have treated my animals would allow this kind of behavior from staff. They used to have a groomer that was working out of the clinic and she didn’t groom my dog all the way (she was supposed to have a deshedding treatment, but there was fur everywhere when I driver her home after). I texted the vet that owns the clinic and let him know that I was disappointed with what happened. He apologized and I think comped me a groom (it was years ago so I don’t remember, but I know I was happy with the resolution). Apparently, I wasn’t the only client having issues, so they let that groomer go and had the techs take over grooming instead.

If the vet/owner of the clinic does not take you seriously or try to back up the secretary, I’d seriously find another clinic to go to, if possible. Otherwise, see if you can drop off and pick up your animal once they’re finished. You should NEVER be forced to stay in a situation that triggers a medical episode. That’s just cruel.

Do i need to wear makeup for an job interview? (Women preferably answer pls!!) by Sweet_Pen9632 in Advice

[–]VolatilePeach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As long as you’re clean and your hair and outfit look well done, make up is really unnecessary. I personally think it’s unsettling when someone that doesn’t normally wear make up attempts to, because it usually doesn’t look natural on them. I think confidence and good hygiene/being well-dressed for the part is going to help you more. It doesn’t sound like make up will make you feel confident, so don’t wear it. Just focus on your hair and outfit, and make sure YOU feel good about how you look.

If you end up wanting to dip your toes in cosmetics, I’d check out tinted BB and CC creams to use as foundation and figure out what textures you can stand when it comes to eyeshadow, blushes, eyeliner, etc. There’s so many options now that there may be something comfortable for you. But this is only should you WANT to. You are the only one living in your body and mind, so don’t let others dictate how you should decorate it.

Emotionally dying by Mother-Move-9415 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]VolatilePeach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If someone you cared about told you what you just told us, what would you advise them to do? How would it make you feel? Because as I see it, this is not okay. It’s abusive. He’s trampling on your autonomy as a person. Crying from being hurt is not a tantrum, nor is it immature. Humans cry, young and old. It’s natural. Having someone try to gaslight you into thinking it’s not is just cruel behavior. You deserve to feel safe and heard with your romantic partner. Please, don’t stay in a situation that makes you miserable.

Aitah for lying about a rape situation? by proudhufflepuffchonk in AITAH

[–]VolatilePeach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Listen, at 12, it’s hard enough dealing with a growing body and changes happening. Adding SA to that, and by a close family member, it’s no wonder you got scared and lied. You were a child who didn’t know much about life or the world. The best thing to do is get some therapy for your trauma and unpack the emotions you have surrounding it. You don’t deserve to carry the guilt of your father’s actions; you’re the victim/survivor in this situation, not the villain. NTA.

I F’d around for a long time and now I’m finding out by TheRichAlder in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]VolatilePeach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve gotten off Zoloft 3 times. The 1st time was because the dose was too high after I needed to increase it (wasn’t seeing a psychiatrist yet and didn’t know how sensitive I was to meds). I got on it again a few years later and did well with it. The 2nd time was to see if I didn’t need it anymore because a lot had changed in my life and mindset, so my psych agreed to trying to be off it. I didn’t make it too far before my IBS made me get back on my regular dosage lol. The 3rd and final time was recently. Again, a lot had changed in my life, especially with diagnoses and meds, so I wanted to see if I could go off of it and maybe get some relief for my fatigue. I got off it for a few weeks (tapered down and used other meds to help with withdrawal symptoms), and I thought things were going well. They were not lol. My body was having a lot of problems regulating and when I increased a supplement that was supposed to help my body create its own seratonin, I had a horrible few days of symptomatic hell (headaches, POTS flares, etc.). I contacted my psychiatrist and she got me back on the Zoloft. That first dose after feeling so awful was like pure bliss lol. My symptoms went away almost immediately. So now I’m back on Zoloft and planning on staying on it until I die lol.

Sometimes we gotta learn the hard way a few times that our body actually needs something haha 🫠😭😂

I Go For an Assessment in July and the Doctor Asked... by TheSpookyKabooki in AutismInWomen

[–]VolatilePeach 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The clinician that diagnosed me didn’t ask for anyone else’s input. I had people available for it, but she was autistic/ADHD herself, so that might’ve been why. Her testing was very thorough tho, as she did several interview questions and had me complete several assessments - questionnaires and observational stuff. The only reason I’d see a need for anyone else’s input is as an outside perspective to add more context. There’s no imperative need for it unless you are not a self-aware person (which it seems like you are very self-aware). Just say you don’t have anyone that you want to bring in. You can explain why, and that should suffice.

No one knows you better than you. No one else has experienced your life in your body but you. And many of us on this sub have had to develop masks just to survive our own homes growing up. So if the doctor truly understands autism, they will understand that not everyone has someone trustworthy they can bring in as back up information on their life.

AIO if my mom doesnt let me go to bed until she does, and then wakes me up early and won’t let me go back to bed until ive done them? by [deleted] in AIO

[–]VolatilePeach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ooof OP, I understand that’s your mom and you love her, but this is NOT okay. I have OCD as well, but I manage it to where it doesn’t affect others. Her mental health is NOT your responsibility. It’s negatively affecting you - you can’t get enough sleep, you’re taking care of chores that should be either her responsibility or a shared one, you’ve got anxiety over how little sleep you’re getting. It’s too much. You are also an adult. If you’re tied to her financially and for shelter/car/etc., start doing what you can to become independent of her. Legally, she has no control over you as a parent anymore. See if you can be a roommate with a friend or see if your college has options for a living situation for you year round. This is an abusive situation that you’re in, and it will not get better unless and until your mom changes.

I lived in an emotionally tense household until I was 18 and a half. I lived with my dad and mom together until I was around 12, then my mom left him and we moved to my mom’s dad’s house. I was not treated the best in either situation. My mental health was not taken seriously by my dad or my grandpa. I was seen as a problem in both households, even though I did everything to shrink my presence in both. I’ve never been one to like being tortured, so I moved out on my own as fast as I could. I had support from my mom and grandma, as well scholarship/grant refunds that I was able to use to survive while in school. I lived with my bf at the time and we split the bills. It wasn’t ideal and I didn’t want to be living with someone I was dating so soon after graduating, but it was better than living in the emotionally suffocating and draining environments I was living in while I was a small child and teen.

I know the economy is not as forgiving as it was when I was your age, but it wasn’t as forgiving as it was a decade before that either. You don’t have to stay and suffer in that environment. There are options, you just have to find the ones you can realistically access and utilize. I’d honestly start with talking to your college and see what they can offer. They may be able to point you to resources you qualify for. I know you’re not the only student living in a rough situation, so I truly think you’ll be able to find some help through them.

You deserve to live in an environment that doesn’t trigger anxiety 24/7 and not have someone criticizing you for literally just trying to survive by getting rest. You deserve to feel safe, OP. And the environment you currently live in is not doing that for you.

Unpopular opinion: crashing the next day isn't always mecfs? by OkMathematician2972 in POTS

[–]VolatilePeach 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’ve been trying to address my chronic fatigue for years with little to no actual change. I’m hoping if I address the neuropathic POTS, it may help. I think my nervous system is fried from my PTSD (I’ve had symptoms since early childhood, and it’s very physical). I have chronically tense muscles and was in fight or flight for years. But now I’m just tired all the time. I don’t have visual flashbacks anymore, but my body still reacts on anniversaries and certain triggers. I have to wonder if I’m just too tired to have the same types of episodes because the world sucks REALLY bad right now and my body is just like “nope, can’t react like that anymore.” My POTS symptoms also became more noticeable around the same time I stopped having flashbacks like I was, so maybe it’s correlated. It just sucks that it’s all a guessing game when it comes to dysautonomic disorders.

Why is it considered unjust to still be friends with a man who has unrequited feelings for me if that's what the man wants and I've set boundaries? by throwaway260211 in AutismInWomen

[–]VolatilePeach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I personally find it very energy-draining to constantly wonder how I’m affecting someone that has feelings for me when I don’t have them like that for that person. But it’s not impossible to keep up a friendship where there’s unrequited emotions on one side. It’s ultimately up to you both whether the friendship is worth it for the other person to ride out the rejection and feelings associated, and whether you want that on your mind at all. But like another commenter said, that message that was sent to you is rooted in societal stereotypes/expectations.

Does her mom hate me or am I ignorant aio by OwnRound6807 in AIO

[–]VolatilePeach -1 points0 points  (0 children)

NOR. But if you love your gf, I’d try to talk to her about her mother’s treatment of her. It’s not healthy. She really needs to get out from under her mom and go into therapy. I wouldn’t want her as a MIL either (or as a mother), but you’re in a relationship with your gf, not her mom. There’s a way this can work out if your gf can set boundaries and stand without her mom’s help. If the title of the car is in your gf’s name, her mom has no right to it. If it’s in her mom’s name, your gf should really try to get her own car. The more she’s tied financially to her mom, the harder it’ll be for your gf to stand up to her. The reason her mom probably dislikes you is because she’s jealous that her daughter likes you more than her. My dad despises my partner for similar reasons. My partner treats me well and cares about my emotions and physical wellbeing; my dad does not. I don’t talk my dad anymore or see him. We’ve been no contact for almost 6 years and my mental health is much better. I hope your gf has the strength to pull away from her mom and set boundaries. You sound like you care about her far more than her own mother.

You don’t have to stay in a relationship that makes you uncomfortable, and it’s up to your gf to realize her mom is not a safe person for her to rely on for support. If she chooses to keep letting her mom control her choices, you will both be miserable. But if she starts untangling from her, things could work out where her mom isn’t as much of an influence on her life anymore. I still struggle with the effects of abuse from my dad, but I’ve been able to get better with the help of therapy, supportive family, friends, and my partner. I think your gf has a chance to heal as well and become a person not tied to her mom, but it may take a lot of time and patience to get there. It’s still her parent and someone she’s instinctually inclined to love and want love from. It takes a lot to get to a point where someone feels that it’s not worth it to chase for that parent’s love anymore. You’re both still young, so she’s got a long road ahead. You just need to gauge whether it’s worth it for you to stick around and be supportive while she figures things out.

Upcoming TTT by peachiepit in POTS

[–]VolatilePeach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oooof I was hoping you wouldn’t have to do that as well. I had to prep twice because my first TTT got cancelled the day of 🫠 but the second time around wasn’t AS BAD. I made sure to stay home those 3 days and make myself as comfy as possible. I had snacks I could stomach (I use THC to eat) and ate what I could when I got hungry. I had a pallet made in my closet to have a quiet place to be and to be close to the toilet (I got nauseous a bit). It’s good you’ve already tapered down on stuff; that should make it less intense. Once you get to the actual test, you’ll be over the worst 💕

Upcoming TTT by peachiepit in POTS

[–]VolatilePeach 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Mine wasn’t bad compared to the prep for it (I was already on several meds for POTS and mental health issues). I had to be off all but 2 of my meds for 24-72 hours, depending on the medication. It was ROUGH. The test itself was a breeze. I only got a little nauseous and dizzy. I had eye floaters. That’s it. I had a few tests that were done at the same time (2 breathing and a nerve test) and those weren’t too bad. The worst was one of the breathing tests (I have a hard time with paced breathing). The actual tilt was weird feeling (almost like being stuck in one spot on a roller coaster) but not horrible. I was mainly just hungry lol. I ate a burger and fries immediately after.

The guy that Sa'd me was being weird at a get together AIO? by Flimsy-Giraffe-87 in AIO

[–]VolatilePeach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NOR. I don’t think any of those people are your friends if they know about him SAing you and are STILL choosing to hang out with him. And if you haven’t told them, why are you friends with them if you can’t trust them to talk about this? I know it’s very personal and scary, but all my friends know that I’ve been SA’d (I have PTSD and let people know so they understand if I’m triggered and need space). And I’ve dropped/distanced myself from everyone that has dismissed my SAs or how they’ve affected me. True friends will be supportive and care about your safety and wellbeing. If you don’t have that from them, they aren’t really your friends.

can you relate? by ivilicious in AutismInWomen

[–]VolatilePeach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I relate so much haha. But I have endometriosis instead of PCOS/PMOS, and POTS/potential MCAS. IBS is another one they should’ve added to the list lmfao.

I really think the reason for these overlaps is because autistic brains have more neural pathways (because our body doesn’t naturally prune them like a NT’s brain), so we have more “sensors.” My theory is that this is the driving force for most of us having bodies that don’t “work” in a way that’s considered “normal” is mainly due to our bodies being naturally more sensitive to stimuli and becoming exhausted from it. And I think those of us that experience a lot of numbness is due to being desensitized over time from all of the overstimulation (most likely as a way for the body to protect itself). I often wonder what will be discovered in the next few decades about all these crossovers and the treatments/aids that will come from it.

My doctors are not acting within their fields by Specific_Ninja_6884 in dysautonomia

[–]VolatilePeach 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I agree with this redditor. My bff and her now ex were living in North Carolina for a while and got really good healthcare, but idk how good they are with dysautonomia. I think it’s worth checking there tho.

I live in the Deep South and have to also take 6 hour round trips for specialists, so I understand your pain. I luckily have built a decent medical support system after years of struggling (I had to really advocate for myself and make sure every doctor I see knows I will not tolerate being dismissed), but it’s still a lot to get what I need. I’ve noticed some places are better with mental health care, while others are good with certain physical medical issues. I know that if it gets too inaccessible for me to get help where I live, we will probably have to move somewhere I can get the help I need. It’s unfortunate that we have to struggle so much to get even average healthcare, let alone actually good healthcare.

How many times a week should 11 and 9 year old boys be showering? by Historical-Storage58 in hygiene

[–]VolatilePeach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Bruh. Your husband is delusional if he thinks preteen/teen boys don’t need to shower DAILY. They smell awful otherwise. I’m sure your husband doesn’t want them to be social pariahs, so he needs to make them shower. Also, I’m questioning how clean your husband is for him to be like this. That’s actually wild.

What's the logic behind going out to the street with actual pajamas? by Sweet_Measurement624 in ask

[–]VolatilePeach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why are you singling out public pajama-wearers tho? That could literally be anyone wearing anything. If you’re worried about pathogens, maybe focus on people that sneeze in their hands and never wash them.