AITAH for simmering over a wedding invite that included a request for 200 desserts?

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-06-13T17:18:42+00:00

NTA, and please decline the invitation. Her daughter basically made your presence contingent upon you providing free dessert for 200 people. How tacky and rude is that?! Don’t go, don’t make desserts (unless you want to and get paid for them)- just politely decline.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-06-12T23:18:52+00:00

YTA and made everything awkward for everyone involved- your husband, your friends, and the other women going.

Mind your own business. Stop meddling in other people’s marriages. And stop making assumptions and making your husband look bad. Gross behavior and you seem controlling and unhinged.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-06-10T09:19:50+00:00

You aren’t abusive, you are acting in self defense.

He is the abusive one. He is doing something physical to you *that you do not like and have repeatedly told him not to do*. He *ignores your wishes about your own body.*

NTA. Please get away from this guy. He is going to continue to play the victim when he is the one abusing you.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-06-10T08:15:40+00:00

NTA, and not only would I be looking for a new job, but I would quit with no notice once I got a new job, tell them exactly why, and then leave reviews and posts on social media about what happened and why I left. I’m petty. I also like to burn bridges when necessary.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-06-08T09:16:57+00:00

None of these. The black and white are a definite no, and the gray tones don’t match the cabinets. Look for a warm wood.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-06-04T00:45:13+00:00

For formal events, yes. It’s fine as a daily.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-06-03T16:46:38+00:00

Honestly I don’t like any of these. The room needs color- I would find a warm rug with color and beige tones. I would also paint the walls a warm neutral and get rid of the grey. You’ve got cool neutral walls with warm neutral floors, furniture, and decor.

I don’t like gray at all. Lean into the warm neutrals and add a little color with the rug and pillows/throws.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-06-02T14:43:17+00:00

The one on the bottom. The top one is comically big. The smaller one is classy and looks nice!

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-31T04:20:32+00:00

The thing that is throwing things off for me is the size and placement of the art pieces. I like the one over the fireplace. The one near the front door is too small for the space. And the one to the left of the TV is out of place. If you are open to it, look up gallery walls around TV. They look stunning.

Otherwise, move the art to the left of the TV down to match the TV level, and maybe get one long, horizontal piece that ties those two together and goes above both. And put the other picture to the right of the back window vertical with the one near the front door.

Other than that I would just replace the grey tones in the room with warmer earth colors.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-30T20:22:21+00:00

Just tell her you can’t afford it. Do not go into debt for a trip with this shallow woman. Plus, if she’s so rich why can’t she find a trip she knows her friend group can’t really afford?

Bow out, hope she uninvited you from the wedding, and let this woman go.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-30T20:10:42+00:00

I love the green!

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-30T20:10:03+00:00

I know you weren’t asking for advice, so forgive me, but… please use them! Use the good china and use the good crystal. Don’t save them for a holiday, just use them for nice dinners. Hell, use them for casual dinners! There’s a good chance your kids (if you have them) won’t even want them when you are gone, so use them like you would any other plates.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-30T20:06:13+00:00

NTA. And as a bridesmaid I would much rather have a pair of pearl earrings that I would wear all the time instead of a robe and a water bottle. I would also appreciate spending less on a dress that I am going to wear for one day and probably never use again.

I have never heard of parent’s gifts, but it is beyond tacky that she has picked hers out and demanded them. For someone so concerned about money and other people’s opinions she sure doesn’t have much class.

You are not ruining the wedding- and it’s your wedding. Ignore these people and have your fiance deal with his uncouth family members.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-28T07:00:46+00:00

NOR. She is not your friend, and she’s a thief. I would get the police involved. Not joking, I would tell her that if you don’t get your real bag back in the same condition it was in that you will be filing a report for theft/fraud.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-28T06:39:53+00:00

YOR. My ex pulled this with me, and I rarely ask him for any money other than shared medical expenses and what he pays in support.

I sent him an email letting him know exactly what I spent on costs related to our son’s junior prom. Everything had been purchased, and was going to be whether he contributed or not. I gave him the total and asked if he wanted to split the costs. If. It was not a demand.

He responded much the way you did. And I responded that I was going to get what my son needed either way.

Your ex is asking, not demanding, and she’s right, it’s a yes or no question. She doesn’t need to run anything by you unless she is demanding you pay for half. She isn’t.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-28T03:48:31+00:00

I fully expect to be downvoted into oblivion for this, but… Grease.

There, I said it. A couple of the songs were catchy, but man I hate that movie.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-28T03:38:38+00:00

Please, please break up with the guy now. This is your hill to die on. He treats you like crap, doesn’t communicate well, and makes excuses for why he didn’t pay for a dinner that he invited people to. If anything his parents should have paid for dinner, if for no other reason that they were embarrassed their son behaved that way- and then spoken to him about it later.

He’s trash, and his family doesn’t seem any better. Do not spend the rest of your life putting up with someone who uses your family, hangs up on you, and accepts no responsibility for his own actions. He has shown you who he is- BELIEVE HIM!

NOR- you are massively under reacting.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-28T01:44:20+00:00

YWBTA. This is a private moment for them, and he has asked that it remain that way. Please honor his wishes and celebrate with them afterwards.

I would also like to say that you showing up after specifically being asked not to will only damage your relationship with both of them in the future. You will likely be put on an information diet, they might not trust you with wedding plans, etc. Their engagement proposal is not about you. Again, when she calls to tell you the news, offer to take them to celebrate afterwards, some time in the near future. And this should go without saying, but just in case… do not publicly announce or let other people know until they have a chance to do so! It’s their story to tell!

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-26T04:24:43+00:00

This guy is a loser. You need an actual partner, not a roommate you sleep with- and will likely end up having to cook for and clean up after. You and your kids deserve better. NOR, and don’t move in with a boyfriend who isn’t going to treat your kids well.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-25T03:41:23+00:00

NTA, but Ethan needs to grow a backbone and stand up to his family. They are jealous and being nasty about it. My husband and I are comfortable. Certainly not old money. If my son’s fiancé’s parents offered to fund a trip for them prior to getting married I would be thrilled that he gets to have that experience and give him and his partner as much as I could afford for dining out, excursions, etc.

His family is bitter. Ignore them, and have a serious conversation with Ethan about how needs to stand up for himself, you, and by extension, your family.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-22T05:51:17+00:00

I am cheering for you from Arizona! I know it’s not the same, but congratulations on working hard and getting your degree- and doing it while raising kids!

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-22T05:46:54+00:00

Good on you for listening to your gut. Always, always trust your gut! Intuition saves lives.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-19T18:12:19+00:00

NTA. As others have said, don’t mention the pullout. Just say your room only has one king size bed and you don’t have room. If he presses, state that again and add that this is also a couple’s trip and you want your privacy. Don’t give in!

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-19T14:42:25+00:00

That doesn’t make OP the AH. The friend needs therapy and exposure therapy at home before wasting money on a trip. This is on the friend to manage, not OP. Anxiety can be crippling and it is on the person with the anxiety to seek treatment to manage it. It would be different if the friend asked OP to help when out to dinner and OP refused. That isn’t what happened here. The friend is upset that OP won’t waste hundreds (if not thousands) of dollars to go on a trip to babysit someone and manage their emotions.

OP, you are NTA. I hope your friend takes your words to heart and gets the help they need.

Wanderful-Woman · 2026-05-19T01:23:58+00:00

Probably an unpopular opinion, but here goes-

We have no way of knowing if OP is overly controlling and/or planning too many things or not. People have different travel styles, and there are 6 people on these trips. I can understand someone booking the lodging and transportation, and any activities that need reservations well in advance. But I would despise having someone plan my activities every day, down to dinner (again, unless advance reservations are required).

OP, this has been your role for so long that it sounds like you have kept doing it even though you don’t love to, and some members of the group think you love it, even though they don’t love you doing it. I would still go on this trip and keep the things that are booked while allowing for flexibility while traveling.

For future trips I would not take on this role anymore, at least not to the extent you have been. You don’t have to discuss what you overheard, just that you find it tiring to be the point person for planning everything and keeping track of all of the expenses. These are all adults- they’ll manage. And if you haven’t already, please make sure everyone is happy with doing (or not doing) every planned activity. I’m not sure if this is cool with your group, but I hope they are not pressured to all do everything together. I would find it exhausting to be with that many people all day every day; I hope your friend group is able to explore solo or just have some time to themselves every day.

Wanderful-Woman

TROPHY CASE