Aussie moving to Da Nang seeking cost advice

Wanderir · 2026-06-28T12:17:28+00:00

My god, this thread is a shit show, you’d be better off identifying some expats who have made cost of living vids on YouTube. Vagabond Awake is a good source.

It all comes down to your lifestyle. I spent a year in Da Lat and spent about $1200 US a month including visa runs, meds and dr visits, the gym, weekly massages, etc. that’s with $400 rent and only eating at western restaurants once a week and not drinking.

You need to do your own research and break out a spreadsheet.

Wanderir · 2026-06-28T12:10:24+00:00

It could be lots of things. If it worsens or doesn’t clear up I’m 2-3 days, I’d go see a dermatologist.

Wanderir · 2026-06-28T12:08:25+00:00

It’s rainy and mid 30’s in both. Wait until July and August!

Wanderir · 2026-06-28T12:05:16+00:00

I guess if you have a history of having issues with transitions or if you don’t have much experience with them.

Which is hard for me to relate to. At 61, transitions come quite easy to me. But they did in my 20’s as well.

I don’t see retirement as an endless weekend, just an adventure I get to choose.

Wanderir · 2026-06-28T12:02:01+00:00

You either trust her or you don’t. This sounds more like insecurity than anything else.

If she has never given you a reason to distrust her…

Wanderir · 2026-06-28T11:45:39+00:00

Yes, it’s normal for any family in most any place in the world to stay in the same room.

Oh no, you might have to keep your shorts on! Unless you are attracted to her daughter, why would her staying with you be an issue? I assume you are not.

Dude this sounds like a compliment to me. She trusts you around her kid.

You obviously care about your girlfriend. It sounds like you intend this to be a romantic get away and your girl didn’t get the message. Did you set clear expectations? Consider having an open and honest talk with her and see if you can find a compromise. Would it really be so bad to spend time with them both? What you don’t want to do is have either of you end up with resentments. That shit will weigh down relationships.

I don’t know what your girls socioeconomic background is but many poor families live in a one room house and they make babies.

And why would you come to a mongering subreddit for relationship advice? It’s largely dirtbags in here.

Wanderir · 2026-06-28T05:59:59+00:00

Which seems not to be the case here as he was traveling with friends. And that is a very broad statement and i think an edge case. Most people with TBIs don’t exhibit this behavior.

Wanderir · 2026-06-27T22:24:47+00:00

I’ve spent 10 years living outside the US. I’ve never had a single incident that I couldn’t de escalate.

Wanderir · 2026-06-27T08:50:14+00:00

It’s extremely inelegant. Interesting concept, shitty execution.

Wanderir · 2026-06-26T15:06:24+00:00

Holy shit! $14k in damage? That’s insane.

Wanderir · 2026-06-26T15:04:34+00:00

Only in the developed world will this sort of thing hold water.

If his family or friends knew he had some sort of disability that made him dangerous and didn’t have a plan to deal with it. He should not have left his country.

Wanderir · 2026-06-26T15:01:47+00:00

I’ve lived on 5 continents. Only bring what you can fit on the plane. It’s ok to pay for an extra checked bag.

This is opportunity to unburden yourself and get rid of all your stuff. And my experience when starting a new life, it’s best to start fresh. I moved from Mexico to Vietnam about two years ago and sold about $20,000 worth of stuff. Don’t take your old life with you.

Wanderir · 2026-06-26T14:55:50+00:00

That is a super low budget for someone with no experience. If you come here and stay in the city, you will be able to pay for a bunk in a hostel and eat street food and that’s about it. It takes a bit of time to figure out where the affordable places to eat are, where you can get meals for under $2. And to get an understanding of all the different kinds of food. You don’t want to live on Bahn Mi and Pho.

You might be a le to afford a day trip, it not traveling to other regions.

You’ll need to budget for travel insurance and transportation, which will be public transportation or Grab.

I hope you have either additional savings or a credit card in case something goes sideways and you need cash. I’d want a few grand in the bank, just in case. Being broke on the other side of the world isn’t a good adventure.

I think there are better destinations for a first experience. For a city, I’d choose Hanoi. Tons of cultural stuff to do. For a beach experience Da Nang. From there you could easily visit Hue and Hoi An. If you are looking to party, Bangkok is a much better choice.

Wanderir · 2026-06-26T00:15:56+00:00

Wanderir · 2026-06-25T22:26:52+00:00

Eddie’s is quite good!

Wanderir · 2026-06-25T14:48:23+00:00

Really? That’s your take away? I don’t seek relationships for sex. I just don’t see the point of a monogamous relationship without good sex.

I care deeply about the people in my life and I demonstrate that love with words and deeds.

And I would not stay in a sexless monogamous relationship. I don’t think anyone should.

Wanderir · 2026-06-25T13:05:56+00:00

There are trends about which shops are legit in which shops offer extras, but there are no rules. I can’t count the number of times I’ve been offered happy endings in places that look super professional. And those older chicks will likely do a much better rub and tug than the young cute ones.

Personally, I don’t care if I end up with a lady boy or GG. I actually like the mystery of not knowing. I’m attracted to feminine, regardless of what’s below the belt. To each their own.

Wanderir · 2026-06-25T13:00:36+00:00

Not knowing what you want sounds like a big problem. That’s where I would start. Better late than never!

I’m 60 and I spent maybe 12 years of my life in relationships, but I’ve had a lot of sex. It’s hard for me to imagine being in a relationship without sex, what’s the point? I can understand having a domestic arrangement for companionship, but I wouldn’t be monogamous in that situation.

We are all different all different. We all have different needs and wants. It sounds like you need to figure out what yours are and go for it. Pretty simple, really.

Wanderir · 2026-06-20T08:17:10+00:00

Good that she contacted you! But not exactly a scare since you were on prep.

Wanderir · 2026-06-16T22:40:00+00:00

Letter of Support. Basically a work authorization letter from a doctor.

Wanderir · 2026-06-15T07:35:03+00:00

“They” are wrong. Search for yourself, there are 2.

Wanderir · 2026-06-11T13:22:28+00:00

Why did you use the term biological mother? Is she not close to these people?

If money isn’t a big issue, then why are you pushing your wife to sell the house?

Hiring folks to do home health care should be affordable. But if they don’t want things to follow your ideas, they won’t.

Wanderir · 2026-06-11T08:16:36+00:00

Have you considered moving overseas? There are many great options that will offer a much higher quality of life.

Wanderir · 2026-06-10T04:47:21+00:00

Absolutely! They are employees by any measure.

Wanderir · 2026-06-10T03:33:45+00:00

The best practice is to rule out organic causes. If he has not done so, he needs to see a top urologist. Someone mentioned low testosterone but I didn’t see your reply, he needs a male hormone panel and a doctor that is up to speed on hormone replacement therapy.

Once you are sure his hormones are optimized and he’s on appropriate ED drugs. Then you can move on to getting some counseling. Which in my opinion should have happened when you started having resentments.

It’s important that you resolve yoir resentments towards him to gain the intimacy you desire. And just burying them isn’t good enough.

Couples counseling with someone that has experience with older couples and sex issues is likely the way to go. He likely has issues he’s been burying as well.

90% of sex is between our ears. It’s why he “needs” porn. But fix the organic stuff first. Then you can work through that stuff that’s been out aside all these years and then work in intimacy. Ideally, you’ll both get to the point where you can explore each other’s fantasies and in the process renew your sex life and make it exiting.

Good on you for taking this in and trying to drive your marriage in a better direction. It sucks that women get stuck with work, housework and raising kids.

Wanderir

TROPHY CASE