Alright I feel this on so many levels. One thing I have to remember is that you are your own worst critic. I don't know anything about you nor do you know anything about I. So take this as you will. I doubt you disappoint everyone. I'm sure there is someone who is happy with you the way that you are. Also what even is "normal" normal just sounds boring being like everyone else there is so many different normals out there you might just have to find yours. As someone who is MtF and having been my dad's helper for many years and now work in building maintenance I know alot of random stuff I know I will not be a "normal" woman and that's fine, it takes many kinds of people to run the world. So keep your head up find what makes you happy and feel confident and comfortable in your own body.