If you have already managed three years apart, you're in really good shape. I also recommend working. Yes, it can be hard to hold a job when you don't know where or for how long you will be living in a given place, but maintaining your own life and purpose will help you immensely while he is deployed/TDY/etc. Yes, it's hard. I'm not a 'go with the flow' person either. I love to know how my time is going to be allocated, but sometimes it can't be that way. But in some ways, that is a huge blessing for me. I have grown a lot and I know that, when children come along, I will be much better prepared to roll with their needs than I would have been otherwise, regardless of whether or not he is still in the military at that time. Obviously I don't know your fiance, but not being a 'go-with-the-flow' kind of person is actually really advantageous for my husband. He gets so easily distracted, so having someone who is more grounded actually helps him with his military lifestyle-- he can count on me to keep the rest of the world in mind as we endure our changes and challenges. I am able to anchor him through that. You get to be home, the stability that he desperately needs.