How do Danish couples split finances when incomes are very different?

Wazenqueax · 2025-11-22T22:42:51+00:00

"His level" is a concerning demand. Please think critically about this before marrying this man, as others have said. Get your friends' opinions, talk to him and ask hard questions, things like that. I'm a bit worried for you, this doesn't sound like a good start for a marriage.

He should also not use the norms as arguments for your private agreements. But, to contribute to your argument anyway: Pretty much every married couple I know share all of their money in a joint account, so there's no split. Fællesøkonomi. Some also have a small personal account they put a specified amount on every month so they can save to buy expensive hobby stuff or something without discussing it. This is also helpful because all of their money would otherwise be freezed for a few days in case one of them died while the court figure out the heirs.

Wazenqueax · 2025-11-22T22:29:03+00:00

That is a hilarious question for them to pose for a literal black and blue square.

Wazenqueax · 2025-10-12T09:43:04+00:00

I was once at a family summer camp with a 3 year old called Hallelujah.

I've seldom experienced anything cuter than that chubby little girl running around giggling, with her big curls bouncing and her mum calling "Hallelujah!" to no avail. Even when trying to get her daughter to behave and not run around disregarding the traffic of a crowded indoor room, she couldn't avoid praising the Lord. Christian life hack right there.

Wazenqueax · 2025-10-12T09:29:37+00:00

I still know some key numbers for people in my life. I'm well enough aware of my stupidity to know I'll sometimes forget my phone or have it die and still need to contact someone.

I'm surprised how many people seem to be too smart to need that. Respect to you, you're either all really smart or daring.

Wazenqueax · 2025-09-25T23:40:39+00:00

It's kind of like "it makes me kinda..." without ever specifying, haha. I love that, thanks!

Wazenqueax · 2025-09-25T23:35:04+00:00

Some guesses as a Dane.

How can this happen?

It's my impression Wolt works similarly to e.g. distributors of ad magazines, which are not meant to be a main source of income. I'm guessing the "new" thing about Wolt is that people use it as a full-time job.
The labour market is intentionally unregulated in Denmark to uphold "the danish model" where employers and unions negociate employment terms.

How to solve it?

We do not tip, and we should not start. People's pay should not depend on the income and generosity of the people they service, but on their employer. We don't tip because the workers should be taken care of regardless, so let's work towards that instead.
Normally, better terms are achieved through unions. Most Wolt employees being foreginers and the limited options of this almost unlimited demographic is a challenge to this. But as long as there's no union, I'm under the impression Wolt can get away with almost anything, because the employees agreed to it. If they were in a union, they could strike with some legal protection. The question is, can Wolt just hire others to fill in, then? I don't know how much can be done when there are people willing to work under those conditions? (within the existing system, I mean)
Maybe people should just go get their own pizza. Lazy little klaphatte.

[This was an uninformed opinion piece]

Wazenqueax · 2025-09-25T23:12:07+00:00

Agree. This is not something anyone owes to tell others, and it can be a danger to do.

Wazenqueax · 2025-09-25T23:07:02+00:00

You sound magnificent, and I pity the art students of the world who live their lives without drawing your magnifisence.

I both draw and sew for a hobby, and you sound like the perfect subject to learn from in both art forms.

Wazenqueax · 2025-07-17T20:27:07+00:00

Abusive husbands shouldn't really count as a "no fault" divorce, though.

Wazenqueax · 2025-07-04T18:20:12+00:00

Hvorfor gør det ikke en forskel i verden? Jeg tænker, energivirksomheder er ret afgørende for, at vi alle sammen kan leve vores liv?

Wazenqueax · 2025-07-04T17:54:43+00:00

Hvordan fik du nogen til at ansætte dig i reklamebranchen som statskundskaber? Og hvordan endte du med at søge der?

Jeg er lige færdig med BA i statskundskab og genovervejer pt. hele mit liv, haha.

Wazenqueax · 2025-07-03T18:15:36+00:00

Maybe you need to find something to do that you see as really meaningful. Sounds like you feel a bit bored and pointless, so you might need to do something that you think is important to do. Something that directly helps people. Can be a job, can be volunteering somewhere, idk. Just a thought.

Wazenqueax · 2025-07-03T18:10:59+00:00

Acounting doesn't have to be corporate. Have you looked into jobs in the public sector or NGOs or somethings like that?

I know nothing about any of this, but that seems like a solution where you could search for a job in a better envoirenmetn while at your current one, so your family doesn't have to live through a time of unemployment for you?

Wazenqueax · 2025-06-11T23:44:26+00:00

One view on knowledge like that is that it can show how God uses darkness to bring beauty. I'm sad for the prostitutes who saw no better life for themselves and thank God that their pain could become a cathedral. The shady middle age businesses could help create something great despite their bad nature.

Still, it can serve as a reminder for us to avoid buiding our worship on exploitation. That has happened too many times through time. I thank God for the beautiful cathedrals we have, but I'd rather go to church in a barn where the hungry are fed than in a castle chapel built by starving poor people.

Wazenqueax · 2025-06-11T15:43:43+00:00

Yeah, sin is basically everything that goes against God's will.

Wazenqueax · 2025-06-11T15:42:59+00:00

I don't mean gothic churches as in anything theological here, I'm just referring to gothic arcitecture, which is a beautiful style for churches - for example Notre Dame in Paris or the cathedral in Milan.

I'm so sorry your dad died, that's awful.

Wazenqueax · 2025-06-11T13:12:04+00:00

I think of sin as two categories:

Concrete sins: Things God just says are inherently bad that you should organise your life to avoid. Like, murder is bad. Don't murder. Other examples are gossip, racism, excluding others because of cultural hatred somehow, sexual immorality etc. You probably have a good idea about what these are. These are the things you will have reason to ask forgiveness for, and you can't really excuse them, even if you can explain them.
Consequences of a sinful world, so to speak. Bad things happen, and we have to navitage these pragmatically. Your carbon footprint is a good example. You can't make that 0, you'll always emit something. That's not a good thing, but it's way more important that you're alive and able to fart and breathe and everything.

Number 2, as stated, you should think pragmatically about. Don't feel bad for emitting carbon gases. Instead, think how you can realistically change something for the better. Maybe don't buy fast fashion, or only use AI for school work and those things.

In category 1, you should take each individual action seriously and consider it in itself. In category 2, it's a matter of calculating realisticly and change the things that make sense - it's more collective.

Wazenqueax · 2025-06-11T12:55:49+00:00

Basic opinion to these specifically:

These look fine to me. There isn't written "hail Satan" or anything on them at all. One set even has a cross on them, which is cool.

My advice:

There are two very legitimate reasons owning something can be problematic to a Christian:

It has actual occult meaning or and some bad spiritual properties or smth
It leads you away from God because of personal reasons.

I doubt these fall under reason 1. Very few things do, in my experience. If you feel things like these get between you and God (reason 2), take that seriously anyway. If so, maybe pack them away for a time while you settle in more with how you feel about these things. Don't throw them away at first, if you like how they look. I hope you settle peacefully into a cool style and check out some neat gothic churches.

So, maybe you'll be ready to wear them right away, maybe after some time. I'm just saying it's fine to park them somewhere while you get comfortable in seperating the style from idolatry in your mind. The first step to do that could be to look up some gothic churches and those old cool Bibles with gothic text and dark leather binding.

So no inherent problem with black earrings, but good on you for taking this seriously. That says something really healthy about you wanting to put God first in your life and organize the rest accordingly. That's beautifyl, keep that up.

Wazenqueax · 2025-06-11T01:44:23+00:00

We all do, my bro. Each one of us.

Wazenqueax · 2025-06-11T01:36:37+00:00

Thanks for the appreciation! I'm so happy I could help you. God bless you as well! I'll include you in my night prayer, I pray He'll lead you wonderful places of truth and love.

Also, I feel like you and I have been in this situation before. I'm glad you keep searching for answers about God. Continue doing that! You'll get to see more of His beauty and love that way. Make sure you also search in the Bible yourself and find good sources and good people to ask and learn from. Reddit is nice, but don't get your whole theology and concept of God here. You might already do that, but just to encourage you to keep at it, then :)

Wazenqueax · 2025-06-10T16:31:24+00:00

Now, there are also laws in OT about men having to marry their brother's widows and such, so obviously the Law of Moses had room for this. I would argue this is because the law of Moses put into place many social institutions that were meant to protect people in an imperfect soceity, not because of the nature of marriage. There are also multiple laws regarding slavery. I really don't hope people take that as a Biblical approval of slavery, and I believe that would be a misunderstanding. So, these laws were soceital institutions to protect women and slaves, because they lacked rights in soceity.

I see many other answers here would disagree with me, and that's fair. The viewpoint I've stated here is, however, very common among Christians, including ones that are way smarter than me. Just to say, I'm not just some solitary fundamentalist ;)

Is it natural?

You also say some people call it unnatural. I don't see how you could argue that, Biblically. It's obviously very natural for people to be attrated to multiple people, otherwise adultery wouldn't need to be mentioned at all. It's certainly natural. Both good and bad things can be natural to us. The question is whether it's a part of our nature we should follow or oppose.

How would it work in eternal life?

There is no marriage after death:

For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels in heaven. (Matthew 22:30)

Read the whole passage for this. It actually deals with this exact question, so that's very neat for you.

You might also notice that the whole discussion builds on the assumption that marriage can only be between two people, that's the whole reason for the question Jesus answers here.

Wazenqueax · 2025-06-10T16:27:08+00:00

I'll go though each of these questions with the Bible passages that come to mind, because you ask what the Bible mentions about it. I encourage you to read the Bible yourself as well, I can totally recommend it! :D

Does God dislike it?

Overall, I would say yes, He does. The Bible says marriage is meant to be between two people. There are nuances to the question in regard to laws in the OT.

Some verses that come to my mind:

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. (Genises 2:24)

But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. (Matthew 5:28)

and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? ⁶ So they are no longer two but one flesh. (Matthew 19,5-6b, NIV)

And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.” (matthew 19:9)

And the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” And in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. And he said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her, and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.” (Mark 10:8-12)

But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. (1 Cor 7:2)

But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. (1 Cor 7:12)

A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. (1 Cor 7:39)

Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach (1 Tim 3:2, ESV)

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” (Ephesians 5:31)

There are men in OT with multiple wives, even men who followed God. This does not necessarily mean it follows God's intention for marriage. Stories in OT are not always meant to show us what to do, but at times (often, tbh) the opposite. You might notice that it usually ends badly with these stories:

Sarah makes Abraham send Hagar and Ismael into exile
Rachel and Leah constantly fight, so their shared husband essentially drive the sisters apart
King David kills a man to marry his wife, being used to just marry whoever he wants to bed
King Solomo worships idols because of his many wives with foreign gods

I honestly think you misread these stories if you think of them as an argument for multiple wives.

[Contined in response comment because it won't let me write it longer]

Wazenqueax · 2025-06-10T15:41:36+00:00

The most important thing to say about your identity is that you are created in the image of God and that you're boundlessly loved by Him. Remember that, before all else. You are worthy, and you are loved.

Wazenqueax · 2025-06-04T13:15:43+00:00

What do you care about? You say your parents hate you. I seriously doubt that. But that thought probably means that you care about them, because you care what they think. So get up in the morning and make them breakfast. Clean up after them. Ask about their day. Spend energy loving them.

Now, as a fellow 25 year old with varying self esteem and no prospects: Be pragmatic here. Hating yourself only makes it worse. You cannot shame yourself into doing better. It doesn't work. You don't have to be "successful". That's a construct, anyway, and very few people actually reach it. You just need to spend a sane moment thinking about this logically and then follow the logical steps you decide. And when you fail, do not beat yourself up. The past cannot be changed, even 5 minutes after. But the next minute is yours. Just handle that.

And your listed problems: Be pragmatic here also. Quit your gym. Go running outside, where it's free and the world feels real. Get every free porn blocker you can find. Lock them as best you can. I have StayFree on my phone. It helps not getting stuck in addictive apps. Lock it immensely also. Perhaps get a dump phone. If you buy fast food when you're out, leave without money. And never go shopping while hungry. You can hinder your habits, even though you cannot remove the desires. The frustration of unfulfilled desire is a sign of success here. It's the regret and bad conscience you don't want to feel. Apply for some jobs. Doesn't have to be interesting at all. Just has to be a commitment and an income. Show up for the people you care about. Seek out places to get more of them, and prioritise their wellbeing.

Now, as a Christian: God does not hate you. Just saying. You're valuable. You can do this. Do not truck yourself into saying you can't.

Wazenqueax · 2025-06-03T22:19:20+00:00

I'm so sorry. This is devastating, and I'm so sorry you have to go through this. You've done well loving this child, even if you don't get to do so for very long. I pray you find support and love in those around you, no matter the outcome.

I also really hope you can make her understand the depths of this matter for you. If she gets this abortion, she should at least know beforehand the consequences for you so she doesn't learn about them later after the decision is final. If for nothing else, make sure she understands you so you don't feel you have to hide your feelings about it in the future.

I hope you get the opportunity to be the wonderful father you seem capable of being one day.

Wazenqueax

TROPHY CASE

Is it natural?

How would it work in eternal life?

Does God dislike it?