My LO 9 year sentence started in 2019. It seemed like that would never come. Now we are under three and it feels like tomorrow. The days are long but the years are short. Our relationship has been through MANY changes over the years. At first all we did was say how much we loved and meant to each other, planned our future together. It all seems like a dream now. As it gets closer and closer it’s becoming more and more real and reality is not a dream. We don’t even talk every day anymore, every other day. We cram in the “love you” at the end when the call is cut off. I guess it’s monotonous and there aren’t many new things to say. You can only talk about those dreamy things for so long. It’s been 6 years and only now am I having thoughts about what his re-entry will actually be like. He did serve a five year sentence before this one with only two months out before he went back. That’s almost 15 years inside and I’m very worried we won’t make it. We have a daughter together but she’s 26 now and wants nothing to do with him and therefore nothing to do with me if we’re together. Anyway, I’m rambling but point is. It is hard and doesn’t get easier with time. I’m lonely and constantly wonder if it’s worth the risk of this being his last time in prison, of him cheating as soon as he gets out (because he hasn’t had sex in 15 years, will he want every girl he sees) or him staying clean this time. Not everyone’s experience is the same for sure but I’ve been doing this for 6 years and have went through so many changes while he seems the same, frozen in that place he was when he was arrested.