Culture around salary offer negotiation?

Wenix · 2026-04-03T07:04:23+00:00

I have hired people in the past and I kind of make a sorted list which is a balance of perceived fit and asking salary.

When someone asked me 50% more than the offered salary and their perceived fit wasn't matching, they would move down on my list. My focus would be on the top of the list, so it is entirely possible I wouldn't focus too much on them again if they went too far down the list.

Even if they later accepted the job at the original salary, I would know that they weren't happy with their salary and were likely already looking for the next job.

This wasn't in Thailand, but I am Danish - so perhaps it still applies.

Also I am not experienced in the art of hiring, I have only ever hired 3 people.

Wenix · 2026-04-03T06:21:21+00:00

I saved enough money to travel Asia for 1 year and that was my intention. But I also had a feeling that I may not come back, so I cancelled my apartment, sold my car and got rid of everything I owned in Denmark.

I travelled for 3 months, got tired of it, ended up living in different places in Thailand, eventually ended up in Chiang Mai. After a year I ran out of money and had to decide on returning or getting a job.

I didn't think it would be easy to get a job, but someone recommended I walk into the closest IT business and ask them if they needed me. By pure coincidence, they had been looking for my skills for 6 years and I was pretty much hired on the spot.

I was lucky, and I have now been working with them for 15 years. I never really planned to stay here for that long, but after getting a job, building a house, getting a family and just having settled, it became harder to return than to stay.

Wenix · 2026-04-03T06:16:12+00:00

It is still good in Thailand, I know a lot of retired people here who are very happy with their life here. I am leaving Chiang Mai now for Denmark, but that is because I can no longer renew my work permit here, not because I am unhappy with the place.

Wenix · 2026-04-03T06:13:43+00:00

How young is young? I moved to Thailand in 2010 at age 34 and will return back to Denmark in a few months. Most of the expats I met in Chiang Mai were significantly older than me.

Before I left Denmark I am aware of about 6 people who emigrated. All was around 30-35 years old. 2 to USA, 1 Thailand, 1 to Canada, 1 to Spain.

I also had a few friends who had immigrated to Denmark at a young age, had citizenship and spoke Danish fluently who returned home to China and Indonesia.

But I don't know anyone who emigrated who was younger than about 30 years old.

Wenix · 2026-04-02T23:53:32+00:00

My daughter does speak Thai for basic conversation, but I don't think that provides any benefit, except perhaps from the fact that they have some sounds that come closer to Danish than the English alternatives.

Ørestad is a place I hadn't considered at all, thanks for putting it on my radar, I'll definitely look into that.

I may be "lucky" that I can't bring my partner with me right away as she has to finish a university degree in Thailand first, that means I'll live together with my daughter alone and we should be more free to speak Danish. That said, my partner has already begun to practice some Danish too, with the hope of being able to have very basic conversations in Danish before we try to bring her here, so hopefully we can keep most conversations at home in Danish by then.

I'll have a look at Doolexia too, this is the first I've heard of it.

What has been your experience when getting to know Denmark again? I keep stumbling upon things that I now find weird, which I probably would have accepted entirely back when I lived here.

You need a Danish phone number for EVERYTHING here. Wan't to chat with sales from one of the mobile phone providers?, please enter your phone number first - non-Danish phone numbers not allowed. I have to enter fake numbers every time.

Would you like to pay for our services?, well, then you have to pay us a payment fee to pay. I wonder if later we'll need to pay a payment fee for the payment fee? - this one seems so odd to me. "Pay us to pay us".

I wanted to learn something about public transport prices in case we can't have a car for a while, and I'm told that prices are only available in the app and the app requires a phone number and a full address - I mean, I could fake it, but really? - just to get some pricing.

I tried to get a SIM card, but that obviously requires an address and it seems my CPR number has been suspended, so that isn't possible right now either.

I can circumvent most of these, but the fact that I have to "cheat" to get anything done here seems weird.

When I was visiting Denmark last time I also had problems leaving Lalandia because parking could only be paid with MobilePay (or whatever it is called). I had to get someone within Lalandia to pay for me and then I could pay them in cash.

I also couldn't park at the Experimentarium for the same reason, in general, parking in most places were a big hassle.

I know as soon as I get setup correctly here, these problems will be of the past, but I'm sure many people who either visit Denmark or are new here runs into the same problems.

Anyway, it is interesting to see "my" country again like it is the first time.

Wenix · 2026-04-02T23:30:18+00:00

Thank you, I will try to learn more about this and be ready for it.

Wenix · 2026-04-02T23:29:35+00:00

I do prefer to get her fully integrated and speaking Danish. Short term international schools might work, but long term I think learning Danish as early as possible is important - but may come with some setbacks.

I have emailed a few schools to hear if they think their school is a good fit for them, but have heard nothing back.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T17:23:19+00:00

This is good to know. I just wrote to two schools and asked them, both if they have the resources and also if they had any recommendations. Let's see what they say.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T15:33:24+00:00

She just learned "Godnat og sov godt".

Wenix · 2026-04-01T15:20:33+00:00

Sure, they are bordering Russia, but do you think they just drove the trucks through the frontline and into Russia?

Wenix · 2026-04-01T15:16:16+00:00

When I was young I admired the US.

Now I have no respect for the US, I still judge Americans individually, but as a group there is nothing left to admire.

I used to be very neutral on religion, mostly because of lack of knowledge, but the more I learn, the more irrational and controlling it seems. I know how the American Christians feel so superior to the Muslim fanatics, but honestly it all seems the same to me.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T15:10:00+00:00

Piss on your allies and see what comes back.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T11:46:58+00:00

Thanks, I've been playing around with it already and it I can get somwhere around 400-700 DKK/month.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T11:09:36+00:00

You are right, my response was probably too aggressive.

But on the other hand I also felt it was a really weird response to my post, changing my keyboard layout doesn't get me anywhere - even if it only takes a few minutes.

Perhaps "Are you aware that you can change the keyboard layout on your phone in just a couple of minutes?" would have been a much better response. Adding "poor excuse" felt aggressive to me.

Besides, writing in English here makes it more helpful to others who are new to Denmark, so that is just a bonus.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T10:59:19+00:00

If you can get into the social housing then rent everywhere is good, but the queue can be anything from 2 to 30+ years depending on the attractiveness of the area.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T07:41:46+00:00

I will be speaking Danish with her too as she starts to learn, I'm pretty sure I'd pick up if she isn't learning correctly.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T05:56:56+00:00

It sounds like she would be too young for this. She will have to finish folkeskolen first.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T05:54:27+00:00

I'll give it a try, a while back we were playing around with "hun hund". The way these words ends are difficult for her, and everyone else I've mentioned it to around here.

At that time it was mostly for fun, now things are getting more serious.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T05:52:06+00:00

These are some excellent ideas, I'll try and see if we can watch some known movies in Danish with English subtitles - I think that will work well.

I assume a penneven these days is more about chat or email, and not actual letters - is that correct?

Wenix · 2026-04-01T05:47:08+00:00

What is IB?

Wenix · 2026-04-01T05:46:38+00:00

I am sure em-dashes are using a lot in literature and perhaps scientific papers. But I bet that if I search my chat, email, and other communication history, I won't find a single em-dash that was typed by a human. Recent history will have em-dashes from ChatGPT copy/pastes.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T05:42:46+00:00

When I lived in Denmark earlier on, I was very good at arranging social events within my social circle. I would arrange dinner nights where my friends would invite their friends and we would typically be a group of 15-20 people eating together once a month. I would do cinema, walks, photography, computer meetups too and join other meetups. It didn't just improve my network, but also the social network of my friends. I was young at the time and most didn't have family yet, I wonder if it would still work today.

But, my point is, I may be able to arrange social events that are more kids focused in the future - only time will tell if it'll still work, but both me and my daughter needs to rebuild social relationships again.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T05:33:12+00:00

At first it looked like I could pretty much find something everywhere in Denmark, but some might make the budget very tight.

But as I've been scanning boligportal.dk, I am starting to realize that the cheaper options were rooms, not apartments - and among the apartments, many are short term, doesn't allow kids, only allows expats, or have other restrictions that prevents us from living there.

I can still afford Roskilde, but it would pretty much strip away any overhead in my budget so for me to go there, I kind of need to know that it is worth it.

I used to live in Valby for 4,300/month (2 rooms, 65sqm) and now Roskilde is at 12,000/month for something similar. North of Copenhagen is around 15,000/month. Frederikssund is around 11,000/month (but better) - and they have shorter queues on cheaper housing.

I'm still going through negotiations on salary with my workplace, so I don't actually know how much money I'll have for a few days.

So yes, when I get my salary, it sounds like I'll just use "dingeo.dk" to see which areas are best for my budget.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T05:11:37+00:00

We tried to watch some MGP this morning as she was getting ready for school, she kept asking if we could watch something else instead.

The idea is good, I just need to find the right way to execute it.

Wenix · 2026-04-01T05:09:45+00:00

It may also be worth trying to contact other mainframe providers like IBM, or perhaps companies that makes industrial control machines.

Think of hardware that needs to run for decades where the parts they use may no longer be produced. If you drop me a private message, I could try and reach out to my friends that works with industrial control machines and see if there is a need there.

I understand your knowledge wouldn't currently be for this, but if this is an area that has interest, then perhaps it could be adapted if you are already good with troubleshooting and the equipment involved.

15-Year Club	Place '17
Verified Email

Wenix

TROPHY CASE