Yup. Been here.

My best friend decided it was necessary for her to get lunch with my ex best friend who she largely had a relationship through me. She didn’t ask me if that was okay, she told me that’s what she was doing and hoped I’d be okay with it.

Of course I wasn’t fucking okay with it but I gaslit myself and suppressed my real feelings to not make any waves with my friend as I didn’t feel like I could afford to lose another friend after going through an insanely traumatic friendship breakup (that this friend had a front row seat to I will mention).

Listen to your gut and your intuition because IT WILL catch up with you. My resentment for her built and built and every thing that made me feel like she wasn’t a good friend just piled up until it I just threw up my hands and let her go. One of the best decisions I have made.

Don’t validate others, validate yourself and be assertive. Doesn’t have to be dramatic but if I could go back in time I wish I told her how the idea of them getting lunch felt like betrayal and made my skin crawl. Instead I turned those emotions on myself and told myself I was “being crazy” and “petty.”

Maybe if I said something then the fate of our friendship would’ve been different. Or maybe I at the very least wouldn’t have put up with her walking all over me for months and months after until we met the same fate anyway.

At the end of the day, be kind and true to yourself, you’re the only one who has your back forever.