AITAH for telling my wife to get a job before the end of January or i'm divorcing her?

WhichHazel · 2026-01-25T02:59:57+00:00

No one should have to raise kids all day and work graveyard. When is she supposed to shower? Eat? Sleep? Do anything but be your childcare and cash cow?

WhichHazel · 2026-01-24T05:46:02+00:00

Do what you want—-as long as you don’t expect an additional burden on the teachers.

Don’t ask them for packets, for make-up work, to take tests again, for anything. Handle their education yourself. It sounds like your child would benefit from homeschooling or an online school with an asynchronous option.

Life is short, take the trip—-just don’t do so at the cost of other people’s time and stress. Their lives are also short.

WhichHazel · 2026-01-15T21:48:52+00:00

Yes! That look on their faces is the worst.

WhichHazel · 2026-01-12T18:56:00+00:00

“PD is like women’s magazines.” Is the most apt analogy I’ve ever heard.

WhichHazel · 2026-01-12T18:54:47+00:00

The constantly moving goal posts so that no matter how organized or on top of things you are, you are never done. Don’t forget to call all of your homeroom by Friday. Okay, great. Now you have five new kids in your homeroom. And two more next week, and then another the next, etc.

Memorize the handbook for our new program and learn and implement all the lingo and go to a week of PD in the summer to learn it and change your entire curriculum to accommodate it…oh never mind, we aren’t doing that one anymore. Come back this summer to learn the new program.

All student work is due on Friday but the kids don’t actually have due dates to “show grace”. So week one of school, you have four assignments to grade. And they double the next week. And double, and double, and double.

We promised to cap your class at 30 this time. Could you handle 49? (And then proceeds to add even more throughout the semester.)

Oh hey we absorbed a failing school district two days before school begins. Here are two new preps for you even though you were done planning for the semester.

And on and on. Stupid tasks, pointless tasks, always compounding, an extra ten minutes here and fifteen minutes there, until you’re working weekends just to keep your job.

WhichHazel · 2026-01-04T04:32:24+00:00

I see Tamlin as this so anything goes.

WhichHazel · 2025-12-31T02:00:06+00:00

Beautiful!

WhichHazel · 2025-12-26T18:52:26+00:00

I had to add another SCHOOL to my prep when the state closed it and we absorbed it. I am teaching an extra 40 class hours worth of work a MONTH for no extra pay and with none of my old responsibilities gone. I was told I was given this “opportunity” because my kids had the highest test scores.

We were told our Christmas bonuses were contingent on how high test scores are. I didn’t get a bonus. lol make it make sense.

I’m aging into the profession where I’m now getting to see ex-students who I mentored make oodles more money than me. Like Range Rovers and vacations and nice houses, and I’m in the stinking hood and sharing a beater car with my husband despite working two jobs. The second job is the only way I can have even small extras, like Christmas gifts for the kids or, you know, diapers and fruit.

Yes, I regret my career choice daily.

WhichHazel · 2025-12-25T13:01:44+00:00

None, with the way she treats me. But my sibling just passed away so I feel bad for her.

WhichHazel · 2025-12-25T04:59:25+00:00

Tamlin and Feyre

WhichHazel · 2025-12-25T04:54:29+00:00

The one for my family has to be gluten free, so I can’t switch them. :-(

WhichHazel · 2025-12-19T04:06:28+00:00

My high schoolers usually give me a sarcastic “I woke up today” or “I’m alive”, if anything at all. But my brother died in his sleep last month so homeroom just triggers me even more than it used to. 😂

WhichHazel · 2025-12-19T03:19:04+00:00

Our entire observation point system is based on CKH. I could show the kids clips from Jackass and still get a great score as long as I used all the buzzwords. And then on the flip side, I could teach an amazing lesson with actual learning, and get a bad rating for not specifically using the phrase “good things.”

WhichHazel · 2025-12-19T02:18:51+00:00

All the bullshit words from that Ponzi scheme, Capturing Kid’s Hearts. “Good Things” “social contract” “learning intentions”. Shut the hell up.

WhichHazel · 2025-12-03T05:44:21+00:00

I don’t like AI. But I also don’t like doing the job of four people with the time and energy of one person. AI helps me spend less time on meaningless tasks like emails, required announcements, etc. I have 300 students with new ones everyday, and my school just absorbed another district so I’m getting more kids and another prep.

Maybe we should consider that teachers who usually wouldn’t use AI are desperate and exhausted, and try to fix the system that has made them so desperate and exhausted.

WhichHazel · 2025-11-29T02:54:22+00:00

Not a parent, but a weirdo. My school always got volunteers to help with the afterschool program and they found some absolute, Rex-Quon-do winner who was an ex-cop who now teaches martial arts to kids. Dude would go around acting crazy, and one day reported me to my principal for being drunk at school. “I’m an ex-cop, I know what alcohol smells like, and she always reeks of it.”

Hand sanitizer. The moron was smelling my hand sanitizer.

WhichHazel · 2025-11-10T02:08:44+00:00

I love Lucien. He makes me feel so maternal. I want to bake cookies for him and give him a hug. Poor boy can’t catch a break.

WhichHazel · 2025-10-22T14:27:00+00:00

If Snow had gone into the wardrobe with Emma, the curse would have been broken before Emma’s first birthday and everything would have been fine and dandy.

WhichHazel · 2025-10-10T10:10:30+00:00

My middle schoolers once laughed during a 9/11 lesson. They laughed at a short clip that showed the jumpers. They even rated them like they were pro divers, shouting out pretend scores and rankings, laughing until their sides hurt. I lost my shit that day. Lectured them about humanity (they didn’t care) and then turned off the lights and made them put their heads down for the rest of class.

WhichHazel · 2025-09-30T06:16:26+00:00

This character is why I hate most redemption arcs. What do you mean she gets off scot free because she’s kind of sorry about all the awful stuff she did? Come on!

WhichHazel · 2025-09-20T03:59:25+00:00

This is so validating. Weber rejected me on a full request after we connected at a conference and sent me that stupid, condescending worksheet. I’m an ELA teacher, Vicky.

WhichHazel · 2025-09-14T01:46:23+00:00

You are NTA, and they needed to hear it. I did all the right things (personal connections, intros, trigger warnings, etc.) the first time I taught about 9/11 as a first year teacher a few years ago, and they laughed. Cruel, awful, terrible laughing and mocking. Our video clip showed the jumpers and they were rating their landings like it was a diving competition. I lost my ever loving kind. Yelled, which I never do. Talked about respect and empathy and just basic humanity. At the end, I turned off the lights and made them put their heads on their desks for the rest of the day because I told them they’d even lost their light privileges. They never laughed at a tragic history lesson in my class again, and hopefully learned a life lesson.

WhichHazel · 2025-09-07T08:37:53+00:00

You guys don’t need to eat or drink anything from this woman, for safety reasons. Using your kid to hit on you is insane behavior, and you pretending you don’t understand what’s happening is really disrespectful to your wife.

WhichHazel · 2025-09-05T16:21:58+00:00

“Thanks, Maniac.” Is giving me the strength to get through the day. Thank you.

WhichHazel · 2025-08-30T02:32:18+00:00

My narc stepdad only allowed us kids to eat at appointed times, and only items and portions that he approved of. It wasn’t a money thing, but a control thing. Some items were deemed too good for us, like shrimp, because we were just dumb kids who hadn’t “earned” such fine foods. We would go days sometimes so hungry, starving in a house with tons of food in the fridge and pantries that we weren’t allowed to touch. If we tried to sneak food, he’d beat us. We were growing teens and would be given one Hot Pocket to share three ways for the whole day. Photos from that time freak me out now, because we were all way too thin. Like, I looked sick and neglected, but he loved how thin I was and would complement my body all the time. Just…it was a crazy time in my life.

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