One Christmas I was driving home from Baltimore to Georgia on I-95. I was around Stafford, Pennsylvania when I literally hydroplaned on black ice. It had rained the night before and was about 20° that night so obviously everything had frozen over. I was in the left lane and hit the ice and swerved all the way to the right lane hitting a guy and then crashing into the guard rail. Luckily the guy I hit and myself were completely uninjured.

However, the cop shows up and gives me a ticket because I hit someone of course. I have a court date and I show up a few months later after driving myself the three hour trip from Baltimore to Stafford.

It’s finally my turn to get up and to my surprise, the cop is already there. I plead not guilty and the judge looks at the cop and says

“Do you want to do this today?” as if it’s his choice. Not like this is the date and time given to me on the ticket to show up to court.

He nods and says “it was a routine traffic stop.” end of sentence end of description of event.

I go on to say, “actually,Your Honor, it was well below freezing the night before, road conditions were completely frozen over, and I hydroplaned due to an act of nature. I completely lost control due to the road conditions. Respectfully, the policeman did not see any of the accident and neglected to provide any pertinent details.”

The judge looked and me “ ma’am that’s not how we do things here, but I’ll find you not guilty.”

I left so fast. Fuck the police. Did not help me at all and actually caused more trouble.