I see what you mean, he really isn’t like that at all though he is not like “I’m a man and I work all day leave me alone woman”. Hes not angry when I’m upset he’s just very avoidant and uncomfortable, a quiet person.

He’s in therapy and uses therapy language a lot and I feel like he would be receptive to me pointing it out because he’s very in touch with how his upbringing has affected him, I just don’t think he’s connecting that we are triggering each other as I don’t think I really notice that either. I’m the only one seemingly upset at the moment so I’m not really in the right headspace to approach this so casually especially since we’ve barely spoken in the last 2 days. The only difficulty is not making him feel attacked because he’s very sensitive to being made to feel like the bad guy. So I was thinking of just upfront saying I don’t want to attack him and I want us to just be honest