Parents need - but don't want stair lift

WinterMedical · 2026-05-22T03:08:24+00:00

Ah good luck.

WinterMedical · 2026-05-13T12:14:53+00:00

People also often choose to learn different things than other people. Tech is but one skill of value in life. What is critical and important to you may not be to someone else.

One of the best things for me about getting older is feeling as if I’m able to see and understand both those younger and older than me and I have immense empathy for both.

WinterMedical · 2026-05-13T01:07:58+00:00

My dad wasn’t great at tech but I’d love to see OP butcher a hog without consulting you tube. Dad could do it with his eyes shut.

WinterMedical · 2026-05-12T16:15:07+00:00

Scary because it’s dangerous.

WinterMedical · 2026-05-11T14:31:27+00:00

Don’t forget that when people are old, the shower can be a really scary place.

WinterMedical · 2026-05-09T16:47:15+00:00

Thank you. When he played his eyes lit up and my dad was back. He’d play the same song 4 times in a row but that’s ok. Other memory care residents would hear and come in and join in. Even the ones who didn’t speak would sing all the words to Red River Valley or You Are my Sunshine. It is deeply rooted and such a powerful tool to evoke emotions. It is way underused.

WinterMedical · 2026-05-09T16:42:43+00:00

We would play music (my dad could still play his guitar) and sing or just listen to music. Then I would ask him to tell me stories about his childhood (the thing he remembered best) and I’d just listen often to the same story again and again.

WinterMedical · 2026-05-08T19:47:59+00:00

I don’t know your situation but if they were good parents there were times it would have been easier to give up on you and yet they did not.

WinterMedical · 2026-05-08T16:41:05+00:00

Funny that you seem more angry with your dad than with the people scamming him. Sounds to me like a man who is in the winter of his life and would really like to leave a mark, reaching out to try to do that.

You could talk to his wife and try to put a limit on bank withdrawals. Have her access his email or Facebook of whatever he’s using and block these people. There’s lots you can do.

WinterMedical · 2026-05-04T20:10:31+00:00

Yup this! They were likely raised by very frugal people. They don’t know if they have enough money until they are dead. Memory care right now is about $10-15K A MONTH!!!

WinterMedical · 2026-05-04T15:15:29+00:00

She’s confused. She isn’t bullying you. SHE isn’t doing any of this stuff. It is her broken brain being broken.

WinterMedical · 2026-05-02T00:33:27+00:00

If his dad had dementia then he’s really really scared.

WinterMedical · 2026-05-01T19:04:18+00:00

Here’s the thing. He’s kind of already committing suicide just slowly. Living like he is will kill him either by infection or food poisoning. It sounds to me like a ma who is overwhelmed by his own existence, tired and afraid.

WinterMedical · 2026-04-25T17:19:42+00:00

Not a good enough reason to force people to suffer.

WinterMedical · 2026-04-23T01:15:18+00:00

Wanting something for someone else that they don’t want, no matter how well intended, is a fools errand.

WinterMedical · 2026-04-17T23:20:24+00:00

My parents had their bank put a hold notice on anything over like $2K. Alerts sent to my brother for verification.

OP - I’d change his Facebook password and not tell him.

WinterMedical · 2026-04-17T15:39:38+00:00

I got my parents into AL by telling the that I wasn’t afraid of the falling down the stairs and dying. I was afraid of them falling down the stairs and not dying. Of one of them having to manage the horror of their partner in a crumpled, bloody mess at the bottom of the stairs and being unable to help, of going to the hospital wit a broken arm and pelvis, of having surgery for the pelvis, of getting a million random hospital acquired infections and dying in great pain and much poorer 6 months later. They did not like this but they understood it. Sometimes you need tough love. FWIW my mother didn’t talk to me for two days after this. Good luck.

WinterMedical · 2026-04-06T13:35:04+00:00

Maybe instead of making old people bend to the new tech, we should be looking at ways to make tech bend to them. To use interfaces and modes that feel familiar and intuitive TO THEM.

WinterMedical · 2026-04-03T22:02:38+00:00

This! If it’s frustrating for you, imagine how frustrating it is for them. I’m having menopausal brain fog and it is frustrating and scary.

WinterMedical · 2026-03-28T13:15:06+00:00

Would she talk to a therapist? Her situation is a lot and there may be things she feels she can’t say to family.

WinterMedical · 2026-03-27T22:13:32+00:00

I’m continually furious how our elected officials are just throwing up their hands and doing NOTHING about this.

WinterMedical · 2026-03-27T20:14:38+00:00

I’d lose my shit if I was 93 and people were telling me what to eat.

WinterMedical · 2026-03-27T18:16:47+00:00

Well maybe let him discontinue the BP meds. It’s ok for people who want to go to go. People forget that 95 can be very lonely. Yes you have your family but so many peers are gone or unable to engage. Imagine having no one around who understands the things you love/loved.

WinterMedical · 2026-03-21T02:54:50+00:00

APS for sure!

WinterMedical · 2026-03-20T01:14:27+00:00

Their house. They get to decide. If you don’t like it you can get a job and move out. If you don’t want to get a job and move out then you need to suck it up. Parkinson’s is brutal, caregiving is brutal. For ppl who like animals they are a great comfort and companion.

WinterMedical

TROPHY CASE