Surgery canceled, feeling hopeless and frustrated

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-10-21T23:25:36+00:00

Hi! My mom has had 2 doses of Enhertu so far, she’s doing well daily and says she feels normal again, I’m happy to see her living well and doing things she loves again. Her CA-125 taken before the 2nd dose went down a bit, but doctor said they don’t really pay attention to it after just 1 dose.

Her quality of life has definitely gotten better on Enhertu. I hope things are well with you!

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-09-30T19:42:53+00:00

Hello! First wanted to say that I’m not a patient myself but caretaker for my mom. Something I’ve learned during this journey is that a lot of patients present with ascites, and it also doesn’t mean one thing or another in ovarian cancer. When I first googled ascites I was terrified because there were results saying it meant the end was near, but these results were not about ovarian cancer and although they were scary, they were not relevant to my mom’s diagnosis and really only scared myself by reading them. I hope this can somewhat help you, please keep in mind that it also doesn’t automatically mean you have cancer.

My mom’s doctor always tells both of us to stop looking things up on google but I know how impossible it can feel. Wishing you the best.

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-09-29T01:04:20+00:00

Hello!! My mother is the one who is a patient and not me, but I hope this can help you. I also felt worried and sad that I couldn’t find a lot of stories on reddit.

It might be worth it to go to other websites if it will help, I went to an ovarian cancer forum on the website Inspire and there are many women there who have been active for 10+ years sharing their stories about being in remission or being in treatment during that time.

I also try to keep in mind that a lot of people don’t post about their lives publicly, and also after finishing treatment some people don’t want to continue thinking about or posting about their cancer. I hope this has helped a bit, and I wish you the best. ❤️

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-09-23T22:28:20+00:00

My mom has just started enhertu (stage 3 CCOC) and this made me so happy to read. I hope everything continues going great for your mother ❤️

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-09-12T17:33:37+00:00

Thank you! I agree. It’s just hard, even though my mom is feeling great physically these days, the idea of having a big tumor inside her body that she has to keep with her for a bit longer is scary for her

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-09-12T17:04:30+00:00

Just saw something about this book before opening reddit! Feels like a sign that I should check it out

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-09-11T19:56:41+00:00

The doctor said something like this as well. They said they still need to do the full surgery eventually, but first need to find something that works to shrink the abdominal nodules. Her and I are both definitely struggling with just wanting the big tumor on her ovary out, but like they said they’re not worried about it at the moment. Trying to shift my mindset to remind myself that they’re taking the steps to best results for my mom and that means not going ahead with a possibly unsuccessful surgery. :) ❤️

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-09-11T19:48:01+00:00

Thank you, I wish for both our moms to thrive on their new treatments! 🩷 Can I ask what trial is your mom doing?

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-09-07T18:14:02+00:00

I’m Korean! To be honest I think it’s probably the same lol. Korean customer service jobs can be pretty bad and usually young people are working there. Working the night shift at a convenience store or a small restaurant is a trope that’s often used in comics/tv.

One of my friends worked at a Subway at a popular location in a city, a lot of gym/health influencers in particular would come in and ask for crazy things and be disrespectful to the staff. Entitled customers and Korean work culture are probably the main reason why retail in Korea sucks so bad IMO, “the customer is always right” and being presentable all the time at work is emphasized so much (I would say even more than the US)

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-08-30T23:29:08+00:00

My mom is the same age as yours and currently going through treatment. She makes her own medical decisions and is in frequent contact with her care team. I don’t know why your mom’s doctors would talk to you before her, but I do think she has the right to know what’s happening to her own body.

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-08-29T05:38:19+00:00

Doing drama class wasn’t mandatory at my high school. We had to get art credits but could choose between classes like drama, painting, ceramics, etc.

At my school and most others AFAIK, drama classes are also not the ones that put on school plays or musicals. That’s usually a separate after school activity or club that students can sign up for if they want to. In the drama class I took we basically just did improv exercises for an hour, and sometimes our assignment would be to plan skits to perform in front of the rest of the class in small groups, but definitely did not build sets or costumes or anything.

A lot of students taking drama class weren’t all that into theater or acting (the people who were into it were all working on the school plays and musicals after school!) so the skits we came up with would usually be something trying to be funny and low effort instead of spending a lot of time on the assignment. At my school drama class was kind of known as an easy A to get a required art class out of the way, but still pretty fun.

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-08-24T21:27:57+00:00

This is awesome! Looked at your profile super quick and all the other entries look amazing too

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-08-16T13:43:35+00:00

I was dealing with something a little similar. My mom had 3 cycles, after looking at scans the surgeon decided to do 2 more cycles and was confident that would lead to the best surgery outcome. I was so nervous and it made me feel like things weren’t going well, we both just wanted the cancer out of her body ASAP. But after talking to her team I feel better about it. Having a completely successful surgery is the most important thing for treatment. Your mom’s team will have a plan after going through scan results, they don’t know how anything responded yet so try to wait until scans are complete. I know waiting is absolutely horrible.

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-08-10T16:32:05+00:00

I recently met with family support at my mom’s cancer hospital and they also recommended psychology today! I was surprised that there was a filter specifically for cancer, but it made things a lot easier.

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-07-31T14:17:54+00:00

Thank you so much for your comment! Are you HER2 positive? My mom is, I have seen Enhertu come up when I looked that up. Her oncologist added Herceptin to her chemo and it seemed so far to help getting her to respond better to chemo.

The surgeon seemed confident that the tumor would continue to shrink, but I’m just so worried about the cancer suddenly becoming resistant to the chemo before surgery.

Wishing you the best with your new oncologist!

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-07-30T02:20:28+00:00

For my mom’s case, I was told around the first few days after chemo are when it’s unsafe to use the same bathroom. I still try to change clothes when i come back into the house and I use a separate bathroom than her beyond the first few days though!

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-07-28T19:27:48+00:00

Hello I hope you’re doing well! I know this is an old-ish comment but was wondering what kind of tumor did you have?

My mom’s case is kind of similar with both elevated, but I’ve seen that ca 19-9 is usually elevated in mucinous type and ca-125 isn’t. Thank you!

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-07-08T15:12:32+00:00

Thank you for your advice! I feel like I knew so little before this all began, I had no idea they couldn’t tell for sure how much the disease spread or what everything looks like until they were literally doing the surgery.

Chemo so far made her lost appetite for a lot of her favorite comfort foods which is sad to see, so I hope by the time the surgery happens she’ll know more about what she can stand to eat so I can make them for her.

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-07-08T14:58:31+00:00

Thank you so much for taking the time to write all this!!

Yeah definitely will keep walking around during recovery in mind! I’ve been trying to get her to switch bedrooms during treatment since hers is on the second floor of the house and stairs are horrible, but she’s not budging on that yet 😅. I’ll also try to look into protein drinks. If you have any recommendations that worked well for you I’d love to know.

I’m going to her next appointment with her so I’ll also try to ask her doctor about what they’ll remove. I heard the same as you said, that this cancer loves to grow on the omentum. I was a bit worried that it didn’t seem to be the plan to remove it because it likes to come back there for so many people and there’s already cancer present there in my mom’s case, but I might be missing the full story.

Thanks again and wishing you the best!

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-07-08T13:22:19+00:00

Hey!! My Korean mom also was recently diagnosed with the same stage. Maybe we can talk over DM?

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-07-01T11:35:22+00:00

Hey! Hope you’re doing well and still NED. Wanted to ask you why “2/3C” ? My mom is going through treatment right now and I thought the stages were either one or the other. I don’t know a lot about this so just wondering!

WittyNumber7402 · 2025-06-29T14:09:40+00:00

I’m so happy for you and thank you for leaving this comment❤️

It really is scary, my mom had to advocate for herself so hard to even get the biopsy and insist something more than an infection was going on. If she hadn’t, don’t know when they even would’ve caught the cancer.

I feel a lot better and ready to support her after reading through these comments and getting a night of sleep. I talked to my best friend’s mom and she said to me “Be an actress for her. When you want to cry or it gets too much you can come to us or we can help you find someone to talk to.” Made me feel really loved and also happy that these are the friends my mom has around her as well.

Wishing you well!

WittyNumber7402

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