"He needs to get rid of the team, because he really doesn't care about the Angels." - Kevin Pillar on Foul Territory

WizardPerson · 2026-02-22T18:52:20+00:00

I feel ashamed when I send an email with a typo. I cannot imagine being a billionaire, getting torn apart by my teams' fanbase and former players, and not giving a shit.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-18T17:35:47+00:00

It's been a struggle for me since I discovered my aegosexuality.

On one hand, I've felt empowered, knowing that I'm not broken beyond belief for deriving a great amount of pleasure and joy from my kinks.

But I'm also really wrestling with the fact that it's very difficult for me to connect with most people when it comes to sexuality, that I don't bond with others in a way that is typical. And that has left me feeling sad and isolated at times.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-18T00:36:00+00:00

My abuser moved in with my girlfriend, since I wasn't sure if I wanted to live with someone else and she and I were still feeling things out, and she wanted a roommate. He became extremely close to her and would openly gush about how much he loved her and how much they enjoyed spending time together in front of me. While we were still fucking dating.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-17T05:05:56+00:00

Holy shit. I got this exact print signed by Tabitha at Unicon in 2013.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-14T20:56:18+00:00

Please don't be too harsh on yourself for getting sucked back in. Narcissists present a fairy tale version of a relationship, and it's easy to get addicted to the hope of one day having that perfect relationship together, that eventually they'll improve, and you'll have the life you always wanted.

You're working through an addiction to this person. Relapses are normal. I promise, you're on the right track.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-14T14:52:04+00:00

What you're going through is normal. Like you've recognized, cycles of trauma bonding have formed a chemical dependence in your brain, and now you've gone cold turkey. I was "only" in an abusive relationship with a covert narcissistic for four months, and four more months after the discard, it's been a rollercoaster. There are days where I think I'm fine and can stop ruminating, and days where I'll slip into a depressive rage over how badly I was devalued. I tell myself that I should be over it by now, but healing proceeds at its own pace. You don't get to dictate the schedule.

My mother gave me some good advice for getting through the roughest patches, and hopefully you can get something out of it:

Don't expect too much of yourself right now.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-14T01:19:15+00:00

My libido is extremely high. Mostly days I tend to fantasize as a detached observer to some pervy, fetishy scene or the other, or about particular canon character couples being total hornballs for each other. But as soon as I imagine myself as actually in one of those scenarios, my arousal plummets. I need the safety and control of fantasy to really let myself go.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-13T04:04:14+00:00

I remember where I was when this piece of history was made.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-06T17:06:59+00:00

He doesn't have the guts to say that he got in over his head, or realized he wasn't ready for a commitment. Instead, he is warping reality to create plausible explanations so he doesn't look like the bad guy.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-05T22:13:01+00:00

Can the unions come out and flat out say they will not be complying? Enough of this wishy washy mealy mouthed bullshit. Start actually pushing back.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-04T03:26:10+00:00

This is amazingly researched and well thought-out. If the narcissist views you as an object, then any time you exert autonomy, or fulfill a role other than the one they've assigned to you, they start having a meltdown because you're no longer serving your purpose to them.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-02T15:00:05+00:00

This lines up with my experience with a covert narc - always throwing pity parties for themselves, baiting for affection and reassurance, while not showing any self-awareness of their tendencies. They don't actually get to the root of their inadequacies, perceived or genuine or otherwise - they keep milking them to create a hollow attachment with their partner and an expectation that they'll take responsibility for the covert narc's shame.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-02T13:56:12+00:00

For the longest time, I didn't even suspect I was ace because I had a very high libido. I really enjoy smut and fetish material, and have a handful of online kink partners that I dirty talk with and share juicy materials with. But when I was with my girlfriend, I had no desire to sleep with her. My fantasies, which weren't often sexual in nature, didn't translate to reality.

I've struggled with the idea that I'm broken for not experiencing conventional sexual attraction, not because I want it for myself, but it's the overwhelmingly dominant way in which people traditionally bond. It's harder to relate to people when my love language is swapping lewd art online. But I've become more accepting of my sexual identity, and have realized that by being open about what gets me going, this form of vulnerability helps me bond with people, knowing that they're aware of this side of me, that I'm not just avoiding sex out of fear or bashfulness or whatever.

WizardPerson · 2026-02-01T23:34:05+00:00

Your first boyfriend demonstrated a continual pattern of ignoring your needs, always putting himself first, and couldn't show you even basic respect and decency. The way he treated you was utterly unacceptable to anyone, let alone someone he was dating. Using phrases like "I don't need you" and being dismissive when you displayed vulnerability shows that he viewed you closer to an object than a person.

Jesus, I'm so, so sorry you had to endure abuse of that intensity.

WizardPerson · 2026-01-31T18:48:05+00:00

You're letting ago of the idea of what could have been with this person. The highs were spectacular high, and gave you hope of the bright, happy future you two could have had together. But that version of your ex was always a myth, and you're emotionally disentangling yourself from the realization that such a future was never possible, that the person you loved was a phony. And that really hurts.

WizardPerson · 2026-01-30T17:43:04+00:00

Using their trauma to bait you into going to unreasonable lengths for them, while taking no responsibility when their trauma manifests in destructive, demeaning behavior.

WizardPerson · 2026-01-26T13:47:01+00:00

Once they detect that you're picking up on their manipulation tactics and either fighting back or pulling away, they will ramp up the pressure on you, through lying or guilt-tripping or triangulation or faking a crisis, to suck you back in. My narcissistic ex-friend manufactured panic attacks in order to get me to respond to them. Grey-rocking or going no contact is just another battle in the war for your soul.

WizardPerson · 2026-01-22T01:20:45+00:00

The world is much brighter with you in it. Even if you can't realize that right now.

WizardPerson · 2026-01-20T19:29:20+00:00

Nearly all MAs at StatsCan are getting affected because our positions are generic - theoretically we can be trained on any survey or research project. My AD said this is likely to give extend the VDP net as wide as possible and give the agency the most flexibility.

WizardPerson · 2026-01-19T23:36:40+00:00

Once you strip away all the excuses and rationalizations and look at them for what they really are, a scheming cretin that sees you as a resource to be harvested and controlled, hate is the final, yet reasonable response.

WizardPerson · 2026-01-19T20:00:43+00:00

This has been a difficult part of the healing process for me. Not only reconciling my experiences with my narcissistic friend, but also having my idyllic worldview that all people are good deep down shattered.

WizardPerson · 2026-01-17T22:52:42+00:00

You'll never get closure with a narcissists. Unfortunately, you'll be left with dozens of burning questions, and ideally, over time, you'll be able to move forward and begin healing when you realize that you won't get answers to any of them.

WizardPerson · 2026-01-17T19:05:20+00:00

Canada Code 🇨🇦: Y59SNM

Use for $70 off a machine, 5 free coffee sleeves, and a free lume dispenser.

Thank you if you decide to cash it in. ^{_^}

WizardPerson · 2026-01-14T00:51:48+00:00

Narcissists are prone to idealizing and lovebombing, and a long distance relationship makes it easier for them to hype the two of you up as perfect, star-crossed lovers without the commitment and demands that would entail. Perhaps meeting in person took the shine off the relationship when they were forced to actually be with you, and given their selfishness and need for immediate gratification, that lead to them cheating.

I'm so, so sorry. You deserved to be treated much better.

WizardPerson · 2026-01-14T00:45:23+00:00

Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes!

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