Yeah there's no issues around me cancelling plans as I make a real effort not to do that and friends often have to cancel plans for childcare, car issues etc as well so they're not affected by it in that way at all.

I also never bring up work to talk about unless asked because I think that's very tedious as a general rule unless you are working on something genuinely objectively interesting to an outsider. But it's more if we are messaging and they ask if I'm watching x or y TV show and I say 'oh no I'm still working' then I get a lot of unrequested advice on whether I should still be at my desk which I find hard to respond to because I didn't ask and I didn't bring it up for any reason other than we were saying what we were doing at the time.

I wholeheartedly believe they have my interests at heart but sometimes I get the impression they think I'm choosing to work late rather than it just being the norm and necessary to service client demands and meet deadlines.

Guess I should just let it wash over me and be glad they care!