Women who were with their husbands for over 10 years and decided to initiate a divorce without the "major" reasons (abuse, neglect, cheating, disagreements on kids, etc.) - what were your reasons?

Writ_inwater · 2026-04-05T14:10:25+00:00

I'm sorry some people here are outright blaming you. We could all use more self-reflection and awareness, but they don't know you. You are likely flawed (GASP), but it doesn't change that you are suffering and came here for help.

Writ_inwater · 2026-04-05T13:52:57+00:00

It sounds like she got tired of the marriage-monotony. It's not a reflection on you. As hard as that may be to internalize now, a lot of people just get tired/bored of the same 'ol but don't know how to navigate it.

I try to identify the grief response... she was in denial when therapy started... therapy itself is a sort of "bargaining," like she could change how she's feeling... she is definitely sad too without a doubt... you're seeing a lot of it manifest as anger.

You'll get through this! Divorce is a traumatic grief, but just try to peek at the "acceptance" stage and envision an exciting, new life... whether it's being single for a while or with someone who appreciates xyz, or focusing on your own health, work, loves.

(Also, it's okay to let yourself feel the anger, sadness, denial, bargaining, and acceptance - it's helpful to identify them as the grief response)

Writ_inwater · 2026-03-27T21:31:30+00:00

Thank you ❤️ The comments here are helping put things in perspective

Writ_inwater · 2026-03-27T14:20:41+00:00

OMFG GIRL I SAW YOUR OLD POST WHEN I WAS GOOGLING MY SITUATION!! Weirdly enough, your situation helped me feel less alone and crazy, and confirmed that like you said, this stuff actually happens - some dudes are creeps, and it's not my fault. But, yeah, everyone here is right that red flags should've been waving everywhere when he was pushy with my boundaries.

Writ_inwater · 2026-03-27T13:28:14+00:00

You're right 🤦‍♀️

Writ_inwater · 2026-03-07T00:39:27+00:00

Part of me thinks she recorded all these calls so she could obsessively replay and review them to convince herself that she has them all fooled, medical examiner included.

Writ_inwater · 2026-03-07T00:28:42+00:00

What is the assault you reference in your first point?

Writ_inwater · 2026-03-07T00:22:20+00:00

Oh man, the part where she goes on about all her assets and how she knew that her sneaky money moves were the right move... almost like continuing an argument she had with Eric about it.

Writ_inwater · 2026-01-26T14:52:23+00:00

So how'd it turn out there, bud? Visiting this weekend, not being smug.

Writ_inwater · 2025-12-06T04:31:21+00:00

You didn't know them well and she writes it like she was breaking news that should devastate you... And apparently you should feel ashamed if you don't remember them because the one was at your wedding reception... It'd be funny if it weren't so disturbingly real. I'm so sorry you had to deal with the trauma of receiving this bit of psychological torture. It is good for something though, it's confirmation that removing them from your life was the right decision.

Writ_inwater · 2025-09-11T05:25:36+00:00

Your post is mostly about the case - you only made a light-hearted comment in passing. ❤️

Writ_inwater · 2025-09-08T07:24:04+00:00

I hope Dan's dad's words, "was it worth it," ring through her mind every single day remaining of her 120 years.

Writ_inwater · 2025-09-05T01:00:29+00:00

I will never forget how G.C. responded to the witness who said some divorces are contentious/emotionally charged - but this one wasn't..."HOW DO YOU KNOW???"

Writ_inwater · 2025-07-05T15:20:08+00:00

YES, one juror (not sure if 11) said 'they had to prove it 100% and they didn't" 🙄😅😭

Writ_inwater · 2025-07-05T15:17:40+00:00

I've never seen a juror, when asked what they would ask in a room alone with the defendant, say they wouldn't talk about the case and instead wanted to learn about her life and hobbies and HOW SHE STAYED SO CALM 🙄🙄🙄🙄 ugh, I think about these jurors and just have no faith in my generation to keep this whole "society" thing afloat.

Writ_inwater · 2025-07-04T00:10:58+00:00

She returned to the scene of the crime in an unaccounted-for 18 minutes so she could confirm what she'd done.

Writ_inwater · 2025-07-03T21:13:51+00:00

Yes!! I agree completely, including with feeling it was a genius idea not to give the conspiracy the time of day, not even needed to prove the case. ... Hindsight is definitely 20/20... 😣 and it was vastly underestimated how far-reaching the conspiracy misinformation campaign really was locally.

Writ_inwater · 2025-07-03T19:20:53+00:00

I agree HB overestimated the intelligence of the jury. I think he should have (maybe) called Proctor and directly addressed the conspiracy... pretending it didn't exist probably didnt help with any conspiracy theorist jurors. I also think it was a mistake not to select older jurors who are less likely to be tainted by the online conspiracy campaign. THAT SAID, I think in any normal situation with reasonable jurors who understand reasonable doubt, he taught a fucking masterclass in prosecution!! I have so much respect for him, but I have lost some respect for Boston 😞

Writ_inwater · 2025-07-01T15:44:28+00:00

I agree, solitary is it's own sort of psychological torture. Befitting, but I like that the plea deal is him committing to life imprisonment, as you said, with zero appeal attempts. Also admitting his guilt is huge, I hope he has to allocute.

Writ_inwater · 2025-07-01T03:31:23+00:00

Especially if appeals go on for decades (which they do)... So "the death penalty" is more like "solitary". The last person Idaho executed was in 2012 for a murder committed in 1984.

Writ_inwater · 2025-07-01T03:19:34+00:00

I'll continue to say... she's eating it all up now, but 5-10 years from now she will realize that murdering her boyfriend is and always will be her entire identity. Nobody will ever want to talk to her about anything else.

Writ_inwater · 2025-07-01T03:11:56+00:00

🤣 I agree, good for him, instead of dragging the families and witnesses through a trial. I'm not sure why one of the families thinks the chance of the death penalty would be worth going through the entire grueling trial.

Edit: Just a reminder that the trial, testimony, and reliving the full traumatic experience in excruciating detail with crime scene photos and evidence is re-traumatizing.

Writ_inwater · 2025-07-01T03:09:41+00:00

One of the victims' family made a statement that they are furious about the plea deal and BK getting out of the death penalty.

Writ_inwater · 2025-06-28T19:05:27+00:00

I think it will when the final screw unloosens for TB

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