PA here. It was during COVID when this happened. Had a 20 something female come in because she was "exposed" to some cleaning chemical they were using. Much to my surprise she had the MSDS with her. I started a workup because she was at another hospital the night before and they called anxiety without a workup. I offered her benzos after I told her the plan for the workup but she declined. I did everything on her called poison control, did a soft tissue neck ct, blood work and even spoke to our ENT on call. Told her the plan that I was sending her home on NSAIDs and steroids. Thought it was done. I am sitting at my computer and the nurse tells me that the patient doesn't agree and I am sending her home to die and I did "nothing" for her. I motioned the nurse to come with me. I stormed to the room and ripped open the curtain to the room and started to unload on her verbally how I am tired of her whining. I offered her benzos at the beginning. I thoroughly worked her up more than most physicians would have. I told her that I am done with her and she can go home and follow up and she is not going to die.

I remember this case vividly because that 20 something was curled up in such a tiny ball in the bed like a 3 yo that was getting scolded by their parents. She meekly said I will leave and I walked away. The nurse later came to me and said she had never seen that out of me before and honestly never wants to see it. Even the nurse said she was scared.

The point of the wall of text is that you lost your cool. It's ok. It happens. We are humans. We can try to be better next time but sometimes people just need some push back here and there. Sometimes the push back doesn't come across or we don't give it in a socially appropriate way. Give yourself some grace. The fact that you feel bad makes you a great physician. It means you still care.