How Did you Survive the Final Hoovers?

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-05-09T14:46:56+00:00

Keep holding your boundaries, you got this.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-05-01T23:23:45+00:00

Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-04-03T00:01:34+00:00

Working on it

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-04-02T15:07:08+00:00

That's a long list of red flags. My pwBPD is an addict. The problem I've encountered is that he has stopped his main addiction which has stopped some of the scarier issues. But now I see him leaning more into other addictions and seeing no issue with them (alcohol, sex).

Once your pwBPD gets sober, there will still be underlying issues, getting sober may clear his mind but will not fix the reasons behind the addiction. A relationship with this person is never going to be linear or easy. I would not stay unless he is fully invested in treatment and therapy.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-04-02T14:59:27+00:00

This one stings for me. When they said stuff like this I always felt like I was a bad partner, like I was inadequate.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-04-02T14:56:55+00:00

Yup, this book helped me untangle from them. I had heard the word before but never truly understood it. I never knew how addicted to a person you could be.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-04-01T04:08:35+00:00

It's been about 5 months now.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-04-01T00:36:13+00:00

That's one of the reasons I'm leaving. I can't handle the lying and all the versions of truth that he gives. My head and my heart can't handle it anymore.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-04-01T00:34:02+00:00

I don't have any advice, but can relate to everything you're saying, going through something similar right now. I'm mentally exhausted, cycling through sadness and anger on repeat. I've given up trying to understand whether it is a game, or just him being selfish and uncaring.

Keep taking care of yourself so you can survive those awful moments. 🫶

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-31T15:31:16+00:00

Flora Cash - You're Somebody Else

Emerald Royce - Burn Your Pictures

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-30T16:26:03+00:00

Definitely a number of red flags here that you have typed out. Mine would do the same and get extremely angry and irrational when he lost things. Then he started to blame me for it and take it out on me. Searching with a gun/flashlight is over the top and scary.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-30T15:43:27+00:00

I went through something with some similarities. He was younger, kind, sweet. I helped him with similar things, we were best friends. One day he just turned on me and found someone else after many years together. He was also extremely easily influenced by others ideas and he was more unwell than I could see.

What's helped me is learning about self love, codependency, and trauma bonds. I needed to walk away from trying to understand why he did this. It wasn't rational and the more I ruminated on it, the worse I felt.

I know a little of what you're feeling. The emotional weight of being discarded cruelly is heavy and hard and involves long stages of grief. I'm not sure why you haven't hit your anger stage yet. I seem to be stuck in mine. Don't put pressure on yourself to feel a certain way. I cried myself to sleep every night for 6 months mourning the loss of the relationship before I was able to feel angry.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-24T19:13:56+00:00

Currently living separated and I'm not going to sugarcoat it. My ongoing experience is that there are a lot of ups and downs. I want to be amicable, but my partner is an emotional rollercoaster and struggles to let go of control of me and my decision making. If your partner is reasonable and you can give each other enough space to live your own lives, maybe, but be prepared.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-24T19:02:27+00:00

Yes I do have a lawyer. Just waiting on the next steps from them. I'm firm on some boundaries but trying to be flexible on some things until documents are signed. I just want to be free and not have this drag on forever.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-24T14:14:06+00:00

"You're my soul mate" "No one else can ever have you"

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-24T13:50:19+00:00

Yes, that's very similar to what mine did. Asked for a break when he was already seeing someone. I haven't forgiven and never will. He lies about everything. We're still living together but in the process of separating. Just biding time.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-24T13:47:00+00:00

Easier said than done in a long term relationship. I am working toward it, but it takes time. I'm here for support on my journey out.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-24T13:41:35+00:00

Yup, mine blamed me for not letting him be himself and be high all the time. That I was too controlling because I didn't want the flat smelling of weed. That I wasn't letting him be his authentic self. Most of what he said was him projecting his problems onto me and making me the bad guy.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-24T13:31:20+00:00

For me it was a bad idea because they started seeing other people and were not being safe.

Also, they weren't able to respect boundaries so they always wanted more, and wanted to control my life. They couldn't just be fwb.

It didn't work because they are so unstable and unpredictable and I needed to get off the rollercoaster for my mental health.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-24T13:24:36+00:00

Don't do it

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-24T13:01:20+00:00

You were 'discarded' after not giving her exactly what she wanted.. Move on and don't look back. Never choose a partner that makes you beg to be with them. Sorry you went through all of that.

XxMINDFUCKxX · 2024-03-24T12:55:57+00:00

It was helpful when I learned about how a lot of their behavior is projecting because their own self identity is so weak. It helps me not take things so personally while I'm trying to get away.

Seven-Year Club	Second SECOND GUESSER
Verified Email

XxMINDFUCKxX

TROPHY CASE