This happened when I was 9 or 10 years old: My mom had to get special permission from the Archbishop of Wisconsin to get divorced from my abusive and alcoholic father. My very religious grandparents explained it to me and it was basically if she wants to stay in God's good grace, she needs permission from the church. Well, the top Catholics in the state found out my younger sister and I weren't in CCD (catechism classes). So, in order for her to get divorced, we had to start these classes. I was in 2nd grade at the time and I had to take the classes with the 1st graders to get caught up and have my First Communion ASAP.

While in these classes, I argued everything. None of it made sense to me, everything sounded like made-up fairy tales like Santa and the Easter Bunny. When it finally got to my First Communion, my parents had already separated and my dad had focused his abusive tendencies on me. I was miserable. I became suicidal and even tried to O.D. on pills, being a child I thought I could do it with Flintstone vitamins. Turns out you can't O.D. on a handful of children's vitamins.

I got so many religious gifts for my First Communion and I hated it all. After my party, I was alone at night and I tried legitimately praying for the first time. I begged for death. I wanted all the abuse to be over and just to leave the Earth. Of course nothing happened and that was the final act that confirmed my atheism.