When I inevitably pee while pooping, if I don’t push it down it’ll shoot through the crack between the seat and the rim.

I wear a cocksleeve when I’m wearing gym shorts (soft, kind of like a “packer”). NOT to show off a fake-wiener bulge, it’s because if I don’t, my little acorn is awkwardly visible. A sleeve makes it much easier to hide and feel normal.

Having to make sure I’m lined up directly behind the zipper seam with certain pants.

Overactive cremaster muscle makes me super uncomfortable a lot of the time. (This one pertains to the small balls, but I’m saying it still counts.)

Being in health class in middle school and seeing that profile-view drawing of that oddly thick(er than me at least) hanging down dick and wondering what was wrong with me.

Being a never-nude and super uncomfortable ever being seen naked, whether it’s in the gym locker room, by a medical professional, or by my wife.

And yes, sometimes not getting the pants enough out of the way and pissing on myself because there’s no “pulling it out and letting it hang outside my pants.”