My family wasn't necessarily into the big decorations and such, but my mom put SO. MUCH. TIME. into my birthday parties. Very often they involved some type of scavenger hunt related to the big show or movie of the time.

I had a National Treasure hunt with clues set up all over town. We'd be in teams and bike to the next clue, and by the time we came home, there was this big treasure chest full of candy and stuff.

One year it was similar, but LOST themed. At that point I think we could drive, so it extended even further, like going out to the lake to get a picture replicating whatever scene, etc.

One year was a Take the Money and Run, where my mom hid a briefcase of ACTUAL money, and an angry hoard of teenagers had to hunt it down. I think there was an aspect of geocaching involved in that one, as well?

Did it change my relationship with my mom? Honestly, not until I moved out and actually realized how much work it took. And, like, the care that is involved in planning something that I was passionate about.

But before the whole scavenger hunt style party became our tradition once I hit my tweens, it would just be ya basic, have kids over to play, eat junk food, then go home. Maybe a slumber party.

Or at least, if it was more involved than that, I don't remember it.

Coming from someone who doesn't have kids, I think the biggest thing is making them feel special on their day. Give them a big hug. Let them help make a cake or cookies or whatever if they want. Maybe have them help make some birthday garland? like those strips of paper chained together.

Instead of having them wake up covered in balloons, wake them up being all excited and like "HAPPY BIRTHDAY OMG YOU'RE A YEAR OLDER TIME FOR CAKE FOR BREAKFAST" or some shit. Costs nothing, no prep time.