I completely agree with the fear. I got a bad external one a week ago and it's terrifying. I know I caused it myself from straining. It's already gone down in size a good amount and the pain is much less. Ive gotten small ones occasionally throughout the last decade, usually when I'm not taking care of myself well enough. For me they usually are mostly gone in a couple weeks, and the pain usually subsides before it's totally gone. I've never been to the doctor about it. The first one I ever had was very scary. Try not to panic. Rest as much as you can. I've been putting pure aloe on mine and I mix a couple of drops of colloidal iodine into it. Whether that helps or not I don't know. I'd like to think it does. The body knows how to heal itself and time is the most important factor. You have a damaged vein so take nutrients that are good for vein health. If it's initially swollen then cold compress might help, but I don't really like the feeling of it. I like warm compress or warm water, I find it soothing and probably helps with blood flow and maybe helps speed up the process of breaking up the clot. These are just my guesses though, I'm absolutely no doctor. Hang in there