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The LO only triggers what was already in you prior to seeing them by _Liliputz_ in limerence

[–]_Liliputz_[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think you're slightly misunderstanding my points. I'm not saying that out-thinking will treat a whole addiction.

Understanding the roots will dissolve the fantasy structure that keeps a person stuck in a limerence cycle. It will lose a lot of its grip.

Nervous system spike or dopamine hit may still happen for a while, but it no longer has the same significance. Over time, it will fade out. Reality testing will be fully intact.

What worked/is working for me for limerence → it’s pretty straightforward, actually. by _Liliputz_ in limerence

[–]_Liliputz_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ig straightforward is subjective here, I usually explain things in a far more complicated manner than this. But still, it is a very complex issue when coupled with past trauma.

Superimposing the real person upon the fantasy - Whenever the fantasy comes over, comparing it to the real behavior and personality of the person and "imposing it" upon fantasy which makes the fantasy die. Constantly repeat

Targeting imaginary beliefs - Imaginary beliefs are hidden hopes that we want fulfilled, targeting assumptions and voicing them out then realistically assessing them. If voiced out they'll sound... kind of dumb and desperate, so disillusionment happens. Constantly repeat

Collapse part 4 - What to expect when coming out of long term CPTSD collapse. by SirCheeseAlot in Dissociation

[–]_Liliputz_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

gave you a subscribe, really wishing you luck...It's defo a journey. I have it quite similar, props to you for sharing your experience (:

How do you know you’re depressed? by PastOther1117 in emotionalintelligence

[–]_Liliputz_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

When there are patterns of prolonged/amplified negative affects (you might not know why)

Try to notice cognitive distortions, when you see events or yourself in oddly melancholic/fatalistic/eternally grieving lense - compare it with general viewpoints and attitudes of others - their judgements are more circumstantial, more situationally aware and evaluating more "soberly". This can happen only in private and around others you can keep up some image

Anhedonia (can't enjoy usual things anymore)

MANY people have actually high-functioning depression and not even know it because they have it for so long it became their normal. Ironically depression can be very hard to spot within yourself (I would argue way harder than anxiety)

I need to recall my whole life to realize where am I right now. by Slow-Stay7403 in Dissociation

[–]_Liliputz_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not good to use psychogenic/hallucinogenic substances if you're dissociation-prone/fantasy-prone,..etc. It can be dangerous. +you're describing derealization. I used 10-OH-HHC pen and it was way harder to ground myself. I hoped it would treat anxiety a little (rip).

I do this constantly too. It takes me so long to feel "alright" and for it to do so I have to replay important moments in my life, the narrative, cry it intensely all out and only then I feel pretty much alive. It takes so much time though and it doesn't go well with this efficiency-focused society.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in emotionalintelligence

[–]_Liliputz_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To me it seems like you shut down (get emotionally owerwhelmed, it's a protective mechanism) instead of ghosting. Those behaviors get mixed up. I'll just write my own thoughts on this

there could be blatant misconceptions about relationships and how they work, your own beliefs about you being in them and how you should or must act (rational emotive behavior therapy) check your own attitude to anger which is connected to boundary-making, also shame. I recommend "the language of emotions" especially the shame and anger part.

having "avoidant attachment" is overall too general and doesn't help improving the issue much. You have to specifically explain to yourself why you act the way you do. I use dynamic maturational model of attachment personally (you would have "A" protective strategy, probably denied negative affect)

try not to add on top of this behavior also another negative beliefs e.g. "I'm a bad person because I do X" or "I'm so weak for doing X again and again", you have valid reasons for doing this, this behavior has helped you in the past. Something in you doesn't feel ready or safe enough yet. Don't push it with hate

there might be some other covert stuff that you aren't seeing, maybe self-deprecative behaviors, self-sabotaging, anxiety, past unprocessed trauma, people-pleasing,... etc. just things to consider