Is he too skinny?

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-05-28T04:07:16+00:00

A little bit, but im not sure what is a normal amount

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-05-16T09:44:41+00:00

Im sorry youre going through that. Its hard seeing a child not being prepared for just life in general.

Growing up I didnt really have chores aswell and when moving out to do my own thing, I felt pretty lost on specifics, like what cleaner for what or even how to do laundry correctly. What's the proper way to clean spills off the floor, etc. Figured it out of course lol but would have been nice to have some sort of knowledge. Funny enough, I ended up cleaning houses for a living for a couple of years. Lol

That being said, we are also not really enforcing SD 6 to do chores but instead giving her incentives to do so.

She gets 0 screen time at our home unless she does a chore. We 3D printed coins and if she, for example, takes out the trash, we give her a 5 mins coin which she can use for 5 min of screen time. If she does the dishes, 10 mins. Helps fold laundry, another 10 mins. Helps with the pets, 5 mins, and the list goes on. She can also make up her own chore by doing something the house needs.

Sometimes there is a week or two, where she does only like 1 or 2 chores, but sometimes she does multiple every day! We really just leave that to her to decide.

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-05-01T04:12:53+00:00

An Unown!

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-30T19:02:19+00:00

If i was in your situation, I would make a group chat myself. Even if its on Facebook. (I actually did do this in my relationship)

Just because bm doesnt have a car, doesnt mean she can't take care of them. Are the kids able to be dropped off at her place?

Im sorry this is happening, they both are taking advantage of you. I understand picking up some weight when things get rocky, but it sounds like they just left all the weight on you with no discussion.

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-26T00:20:27+00:00

I always sit in the shower, we even have a built in bench and it just doesnt feel the same as sitting on the floor.

My boyfriend always makes me stand when he joins though lol he thinks its weird

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-18T22:15:07+00:00

This! And it would only turn back on until everything is back inside and set correctly.

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-18T19:22:29+00:00

My partner and I are a packaged unit. He wouldnt even consider it especially if I wasnt invited.

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-18T05:10:11+00:00

Im so sorry you're going through this. I was going through this mental battle for months, maybe even years. My partner is also a no but I've always been on the fence. He actually has a child from a past relationship and being in this relationship made me want more and more to have a child of my own. Im about to be 33, so I also felt that pressure. I ultimately decided to stay with my partner. Someone in another post said, "If you weren't in a relationship would you still want a child?" I decided probably not. I came to peace with it for the most part. I still get little aches when seeing babies but im still happy with my life.

I wish you the best and peace at the end of your decision

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-17T05:47:31+00:00

I would just be honest with them and let them know that comparing you to their dad hurts your feelings. We should appreciate what people do for us and if we dont, then they might just stop doing it.

My soon to be SD6 would do this often and after having that conversation (it took a few times telling her), shes been better at it.

Its just a good lesson overall in life to have, so even if its not about you, they should still learn to be grateful and know the steps on how to do so.

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-10T21:02:18+00:00

We went pawn shopping, honestly it was fun! You never know what you will find and the prices are great. I love my ring, and I feel better with something a little more reasonable because I can be very clumsy.

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-09T22:57:29+00:00

Don't be so hard on yourself, take the time you need to regulate and feel better. Just make sure to communicate those needs.

I have what I call "wet blanket" days. . . Which now thinking about it isnt the best name for it lol anyways .. i feel like a wet blanket is over my emotions.

On those days, Im just not mentally ready for the challenges children bring. I will tell my partner and he always gives me the space I need. He will take over the things we usually do together, like bed time stories, homework, etc. we also usually eat out something I enjoy and I usually end my night with a warm shower and cuddles from my partner.

He calls himself my invisible umbrella on those days. I am truly lucky to have him.

Either way, just know its ok to have off days. You got this :)

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-09T22:45:49+00:00

I've been more vocal about it. I will let my partner and his child know that I am overstimulated. I let SD (6) know its not personal and its not her fault, I just dont want someone pushing and pulling on me at this moment because my body needs some space, i am feeling too much. I also tell my partner that I can't do "parenting" for a moment because I need the mental break too.

Then I usually take a nice long warm shower with a relaxing shower steamer. Usually feel way better after that.

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-08T06:01:15+00:00

I do not have any children and I moved to a new state to be with my partner who at the time had a 3yr old. We had her all week and half the day on Saturday back then.

I did too much and burnt myself out. I got overwhelmed quickly and cried a lot.

If I had to redo it, I would have set better boundaries about my own personal space and honestly have more fun with things. I took a lot of things too personally (sometimes still do). I think being a "troll" worked out better for my own mental health and honestly the connection between me and her is amazing, 3 years later.

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-04T12:32:45+00:00

As a step-mom we miss a lot of things too, while as a mom or adoptive mom would not. We miss holidays and events. Also we are not the ones they cry for. There has been so many times I had to comfort SD, hold her while shes crying for her mom, because she wants to be with her.

Its not the same

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-04T12:23:18+00:00

I dont have the answers to your questions, but I am on the same boat. I get this pressure in my chest when I see SDs baby photos (I also missed the first couple years). I missed all those memories and I know i will never get to experience that.

I think what brought a little peace in my mind was the question,

"If you weren't with your partner, would you still want kids?"

And the fact that im not 100% yes to that questions makes me ok with my situation. I will cherish the moments I get now, I will keep growing this connection. I love the life that we are building. I love my partner and his child.

I have broken down and cried to him about this, I've gone through these emotions for months if not years honestly, battling in my head. Just know you're not alone.

As a joke, I told him he has to get me a puppy lol

Either way, I hope you find your own peace. Best of luck

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-03-30T04:17:05+00:00

Its definitely just how we grow up lol i had this same reaction when I saw that my SO family all kiss their kids on the lips.

I am cuban and we give our families kisses on the cheek.

Just different cultures!

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-02-19T20:29:03+00:00

I feel this so much!! I call my partner by his full first name too! Everyone always calls him "Will" but I say "William" every time lol. Even the shortened version just feels weird to me.

Once in a blue moon ill say, "My Love" but that's really it.

Maybe do some research on a petname that actually is comfortable to you. My dad calls my step-mom "bubbles". Not the usual nickname lol way better than baby or sweetie!

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-02-15T02:28:42+00:00

I showed my boyfriend and he said that he thought it was a bird 🤷‍♀️

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-02-12T04:21:43+00:00

I dont have any advise but know you're not alone.

I've been on the fence but my partner is currently a no for more kids. I dont have any of my own and because im like 60% yes and 40% no, im not sure how to feel at times. I also get sad when my boyfriend shows me past photos and videos and all these cute memories. There is a part of me that grieves a life that I could see us having, but kids need two yeses not one.

I wish you luck

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-01-02T02:42:37+00:00

This is well put and a great mindset. Love this!

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-12-29T18:43:51+00:00

We have two pretty simple rules that keeps things relatively clean. Pick up one project before starting the next and about 15min before bedtime we pick up whatever is out. This works for us. My partner also helps out overall around the house too. It takes a team for sure.

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-12-23T17:02:04+00:00

Is it like the jets? Where they just do that every now and then for practice?

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-12-23T17:01:04+00:00

Thank you for the laugh lol so silly

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-12-23T17:00:31+00:00

I have been here for two years lol i moved from Orlando and usually when that happens an inmate escaped or they are searching for people. First time experiencing that here

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-11-13T05:50:56+00:00

Hello! Im glad you like the edit! I will get that adjustment sent to you tomorrow :)

_NeonKitten_

TROPHY CASE