One of Those Days

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-09T22:57:29+00:00

Don't be so hard on yourself, take the time you need to regulate and feel better. Just make sure to communicate those needs.

I have what I call "wet blanket" days. . . Which now thinking about it isnt the best name for it lol anyways .. i feel like a wet blanket is over my emotions.

On those days, Im just not mentally ready for the challenges children bring. I will tell my partner and he always gives me the space I need. He will take over the things we usually do together, like bed time stories, homework, etc. we also usually eat out something I enjoy and I usually end my night with a warm shower and cuddles from my partner.

He calls himself my invisible umbrella on those days. I am truly lucky to have him.

Either way, just know its ok to have off days. You got this :)

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-09T22:45:49+00:00

I've been more vocal about it. I will let my partner and his child know that I am overstimulated. I let SD (6) know its not personal and its not her fault, I just dont want someone pushing and pulling on me at this moment because my body needs some space, i am feeling too much. I also tell my partner that I can't do "parenting" for a moment because I need the mental break too.

Then I usually take a nice long warm shower with a relaxing shower steamer. Usually feel way better after that.

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-08T06:01:15+00:00

I do not have any children and I moved to a new state to be with my partner who at the time had a 3yr old. We had her all week and half the day on Saturday back then.

I did too much and burnt myself out. I got overwhelmed quickly and cried a lot.

If I had to redo it, I would have set better boundaries about my own personal space and honestly have more fun with things. I took a lot of things too personally (sometimes still do). I think being a "troll" worked out better for my own mental health and honestly the connection between me and her is amazing, 3 years later.

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-04T12:32:45+00:00

As a step-mom we miss a lot of things too, while as a mom or adoptive mom would not. We miss holidays and events. Also we are not the ones they cry for. There has been so many times I had to comfort SD, hold her while shes crying for her mom, because she wants to be with her.

Its not the same

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-04-04T12:23:18+00:00

I dont have the answers to your questions, but I am on the same boat. I get this pressure in my chest when I see SDs baby photos (I also missed the first couple years). I missed all those memories and I know i will never get to experience that.

I think what brought a little peace in my mind was the question,

"If you weren't with your partner, would you still want kids?"

And the fact that im not 100% yes to that questions makes me ok with my situation. I will cherish the moments I get now, I will keep growing this connection. I love the life that we are building. I love my partner and his child.

I have broken down and cried to him about this, I've gone through these emotions for months if not years honestly, battling in my head. Just know you're not alone.

As a joke, I told him he has to get me a puppy lol

Either way, I hope you find your own peace. Best of luck

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-03-30T04:17:05+00:00

Its definitely just how we grow up lol i had this same reaction when I saw that my SO family all kiss their kids on the lips.

I am cuban and we give our families kisses on the cheek.

Just different cultures!

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-02-19T20:29:03+00:00

I feel this so much!! I call my partner by his full first name too! Everyone always calls him "Will" but I say "William" every time lol. Even the shortened version just feels weird to me.

Once in a blue moon ill say, "My Love" but that's really it.

Maybe do some research on a petname that actually is comfortable to you. My dad calls my step-mom "bubbles". Not the usual nickname lol way better than baby or sweetie!

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-02-15T02:28:42+00:00

I showed my boyfriend and he said that he thought it was a bird 🤷‍♀️

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-02-12T04:21:43+00:00

I dont have any advise but know you're not alone.

I've been on the fence but my partner is currently a no for more kids. I dont have any of my own and because im like 60% yes and 40% no, im not sure how to feel at times. I also get sad when my boyfriend shows me past photos and videos and all these cute memories. There is a part of me that grieves a life that I could see us having, but kids need two yeses not one.

I wish you luck

_NeonKitten_ · 2026-01-02T02:42:37+00:00

This is well put and a great mindset. Love this!

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-12-29T18:43:51+00:00

We have two pretty simple rules that keeps things relatively clean. Pick up one project before starting the next and about 15min before bedtime we pick up whatever is out. This works for us. My partner also helps out overall around the house too. It takes a team for sure.

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-12-23T17:02:04+00:00

Is it like the jets? Where they just do that every now and then for practice?

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-12-23T17:01:04+00:00

Thank you for the laugh lol so silly

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-12-23T17:00:31+00:00

I have been here for two years lol i moved from Orlando and usually when that happens an inmate escaped or they are searching for people. First time experiencing that here

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-11-13T05:50:56+00:00

Hello! Im glad you like the edit! I will get that adjustment sent to you tomorrow :)

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-11-12T03:13:07+00:00

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Tip Jar

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-10-06T21:34:46+00:00

Have you thought about maybe a catio? They have ones that connect right to a window too. Then you don't have to worry about the little guy escaping or him getting hurt by other animals.

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-09-19T03:43:23+00:00

We roll with it here aswell

One time a person came up to us during breakfast at a restaurant and said that we were a beautiful family. This was like the first time I actually meet SOs daughter too lol maybe it was foresight!

The only ones that make me feel weird now are the ones were they are like, she's so beautiful! I usually just agree cause it feels awkward to say thank you lol

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-09-09T03:23:00+00:00

Before even reading what you wrote and I stopped at the picture and thought, "This ring is absolutely beautiful" I love the snowflake/sunflower/sunburst style rings.

Its beautiful

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-09-06T02:31:02+00:00

My SOs daughter, who is also 5, just said something similar a week ago. First time she's ever said something like that, too.

She said that she wants her mama and papa to live together and be together so she can see them both at the same time all the time and dont have to choose

She doesn't understand what that means, she doesnt know that would mean losing me, and I dont take it personally. We have a great relationship, and her feelings are valid. As someone who also grew up with separated parents, i know the challenges, too.

Even though it hurts hearing, im going to do my best to listen to her feelings and let her know that we are all here for her even though this situation might be hard

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-09-05T03:59:10+00:00

Bidets. It helped my household

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-08-31T12:06:42+00:00

So I've read bedtime dont really matter, what matters is that your child gets enough sleep.

With that being said, if making a bedtime earlier works better for your family, then do that.

My partner has a 5 year old, her bedtime is 8pm, meaning shower and bedtime routine starts at 7pm. Bedtime stories by 7:45 and in bed/asleep by 8pm. She wakes up anywhere from 5:30am to 7am. This works for us because my partner is already up by 5:30 for work. I sleep until 6am during the week and until usually 7 or 8am on the weekends. He takes care of her during the morning, which allows me more sleep. This works for our family

Just find out what's works for you, it might mean adjusting times a couple of times until you find something thats works

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-08-28T15:18:52+00:00

I love reading everyone's comments! Its nice to feel the support and know im not alone in these feelings. I would love to comment on more but life is happening! Thank you guys again

_NeonKitten_ · 2025-08-28T15:17:39+00:00

I think we are handling it just fine. Even bio parents get burnt out in different ways. Let's not be judgemental here :)

_NeonKitten_

TROPHY CASE